Jenni Lake, Pregnant Teen, Stopped Cancer Treatment To Protect Baby In Idaho

First Posted: 12/29/11 03:23 PM ET Updated: 12/29/11 06:26 PM ET

POCATELLO, Idaho - Jenni Lake gave birth to a baby boy the month before her 18th birthday, though she was not destined to become just another teenage mother.

That much, she knew.

While being admitted to the hospital, she pulled her nurse down to her at bed level and whispered into her ear. The nurse would later repeat the girl's words to comfort her family, as their worst fears were realized a day after Jenni's baby was born.

"She told the nurse, 'I'm done, I did what I was supposed to. My baby is going to get here safe,'" said Diana Phillips, Jenni's mother.

In photographs, the baby's ruddy cheeks and healthy weight offer a stark contrast to the frail girl who gave birth to him. She holds the newborn tightly, kissing the top of his head. Jenni, at 5 feet and 4 inches (1.6 metres) tall, weighed only 108 pounds (49 kilograms) at the full term of her pregnancy.

A day after the Nov. 9 birth, Phillips learned that her daughter's decision to forgo treatment for tumours on her brain and spine so she could carry the baby would have fatal repercussions. The cancer had marked too much territory. Nothing could be done, Phillips said.

It was only 12 days past the birth — half spent in the hospital and the other half at home — before Jenni was gone.

Even so, her family and friends insist her legacy is not one centred in tragedy, but rather in sacrifice.

This month, her family gathered at their ranch-style home in Pocatello, where a Christmas tree in the living room was adorned with ornaments picked out just for Jenni, including one in bright lime green, her favouritecolour. She had passed away in a bedroom down the hall.

Recalling Jenni's infectious laugh and a rebellious streak, her mother held the baby close, nuzzling his head, and said, "I want him to know everything about her, and what she did."

———

The migraines started last year, when Jenni was a 16-year-old sophomore at Pocatello High School. She was taken to the family doctor, and an MRI scan found a small mass measuring about two centimetres wide on the right side of her brain.

She was sent to a hospital in Salt Lake City, some 240 kilometres south of Pocatello, and another scan there showed the mass was bigger than previously thought.

Jenni had a biopsy Oct. 15, 2010, and five days later was diagnosed with stage three astrocytoma, a type of brain tumour. With three tumours on her brain and three on her spine, Jenni was told her case was rare because the cancer had spread from her brain to another part of her body with no symptoms.

Her parents, who are divorced, remember they were brought into a room at the hospital and sat down at a long table as doctors discussed her chances of survival.

"Jenni just flat out asked them if she was going to die," said her father, Mike Lake, 43, a truck driver who lives in Rexburg, north of Pocatello.

The answer wasn't good. With treatment, the teen was told she had a 30 per cent chance to make it two years, Lake said. While he was heartbroken, Lake marvelled at how strong she seemed in that moment. "She didn't break down and cry or anything," he said.

But her mom recalled Jenni did have a weak moment that day.

"When they told her that she might not be able to have kids, she got upset," said Phillips, 39.

Jenni started aggressive chemotherapy and radiation treatments, while also posting videos on a YouTube site titled "Jenni's Journey," where she hoped to share her story with updates every other day. She managed to upload only three videos, though, as her treatments left her tired and weak.

On her second video, posted Nov. 20, 2010, Jenni appears distraught while a family friend records her having lunch with her mom.

"Last night, like, I was just lying in bed and I was thinking about everything that was going on and it just, like, it just hit me, like everything, and I don't know, it made me cry," Jenni says on the video.

Her mom is shown burying her face in her hands. "Do you know how hard it is to be a mom and know that she's sick and there's nothing you can do?" she says, before collapsing into tears.

Jenni persists: "It's hard. It's, like, I don't know how long this is going to last and I just want it to go away ... I feel like this is holding me back from so much ..."

By March of this year, the tumours had started to shrink, the family said.

In a picture taken at her prom in early May, Jenni is wearing a dark blue strapless dress and gives the camera a small smile. There's a silver headband in her hair, which is less than 2.5 centimetres long. Chemotherapy took her shoulder-length blond tresses.

Her boyfriend, Nathan Wittman, wearing a black dress shirt and pants, is cradling her from behind.

———

Jenni started dating Nathan a couple of weeks before she received her diagnosis. Their adolescent relationship withstood the very adult test posed by cancer, the treatments that left her barely able to walk from her living room to her bedroom, and the gossip at school.

"The rumours started flying around, like Nathan was only with her because she had cancer," said Jenni's older sister, Ashlee Lake, 20, who tried to squelch the mean-spirited chatter even as the young couple ignored it.

They were hopeful, and dreamed of someday opening a restaurant or a gallery.

Jenni had been working as an apprentice in a local tattoo shop. "She was like our little sister," said the owner, Kass Chacon. But in May, Jenni's visits to the shop grew less frequent.

She had been throwing up a lot and had sharp stomach pains. She went to the emergency room early one morning with her boyfriend and when she returned home, her family members woke up to the sound of crying. "We could hear Jenni just bawling in her room," said her sister, Kaisee, 19.

She had learned that she was pregnant, and an ultrasound would show the fetus was 10 weeks old.

Jenni's journey was no longer her own.

From the start of treatment, she was told that she might never have children, her mother said, that the radiation and chemotherapy could essentially make her sterile.

"We were told that she couldn't get pregnant, so we didn't worry about it," said Nathan, 19.

Jenni, the third of her parents' eight children, had always wanted to be a mom. She had already determined to keep the baby when she went to see her oncologist, Dr. David Ririe, in Pocatello two days after she found out she was pregnant.

"He told us that if she's pregnant, she can't continue the treatments," Phillips said. "So she would either have to terminate the pregnancy and continue the treatments, or stop the treatments, knowing that it could continue to grow again."

Ririe would not discuss Jenni's care, citing privacy laws, but said, generally, in cases in which a cancer patient is pregnant, oncologists will consider both the risks and benefits of continuing with treatment, such as chemotherapy.

"There are times during pregnancy in some situations, breast cancer being the classic example, where the benefits of chemotherapy may outweigh the risk to mother and baby," Ririe said. "There are other times where the risk outweighs the benefits."

There was no discussion about which path Jenni would choose. Her parents didn't think of it as a clear life or death decision, and Jenni may not have, either. They believed that since the tumours had already started to shrink earlier, she had a strong chance of carrying the baby and then returning to treatment after he was born.

"I guess we were just hoping that after she had the baby, she could go back on the chemotherapy and get better," her mother said.

———

Jenni and Nathan named the baby Chad Michael, after their dads. Nathan has legal custody of the child, who is primarily cared for by Nathan's mother, Alexia Wittman, 51.

"Nathan will raise him," she said. She brings the baby to Jenni's house to visit her family whenever they ask.

Jenni didn't show regret for her decision, not in the final weeks of her pregnancy as she grew weaker, and not when she started to lose her vision as the cancer took its course, her family said.

Jenni's last words were about her son as he was placed beside her a final time, her father said. As she felt for the baby, she said: "I can kind of see him."

———

Jenni's Journey: www.facebook.com/jennis.journey

Jenni's YouTube videos: http://www.youtube.com/jennisjourney

Below, photos of Jenni Lake's family and newborn son:
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"Chad Michael was born on 11/9/11 at 5:21 p.m. He was 6 pounds 3 ounces and 19 inches long. And, as you can see, perfect and beautiful. :)" -Jenni's Facebook page
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POCATELLO, Idaho - Jenni Lake gave birth to a baby boy the month before her 18th birthday, though she was not destined to become just another teenage mother.That much, she knew.While being admitted to...
POCATELLO, Idaho - Jenni Lake gave birth to a baby boy the month before her 18th birthday, though she was not destined to become just another teenage mother.That much, she knew.While being admitted to...
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
dollydimple62
Author....reader ,love life.
05:25 PM on 01/03/2012
Such a sad tale of a brave young lady! a selfless act.... I hope that little baby always knows what a wonderful courageous mummy she had...
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Alexander Borschel
01:12 PM on 01/03/2012
It is a very sad tale, but it gave her life meaning, and her son will be one who knows, knows that he was loved to a point that his mother wouldnt just give her life so he could live, but that she already has. There is no greater blessing a person can have, I hope reading this article, someday, will bring her child peace.

I've seen a few people remark that self-sacrifice is something to avoid. It is when it is for selfish reasons... and what fool could even try to remark there was anything selfish in what she did?

I hope, I pray to be as good a father to my children, should I ever be gifted with them, as she was. I hope between my life and theirs, I have the courage to forgo my safety for them, and put them first. I hope I can be like this 17 year old.
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CharliDenae
04:09 PM on 01/02/2012
You know, my naivety continues to astound me. I am actually shocked by some of the things people have written about this story. I'm thinking, 'What a brave girl to do that. That's such a loving and mature decision to make." and other people are talking about how irresponsible she was and making political comments. *sigh* I guess I just shouldn't read the comments when I read one of these stories because I want to keep my naive fantasy that people are basically loving and caring.

Anyway, I, too, was diagnosed with cancer as a teen. My boyfriend and I had just begun dating the year before when I found out. I was in the fourth stage already and, though I didn't get pregnant, we were having sex. We were normal teenagers and cancer does not stop hormones. I honestly don't know what I would've done in a similar situation but I am proud of Jenni for the decision she made. I, too, did not know if I would make it and aborting a baby that may have a long, healthy life when my chances were slim, seems like a bad choice to me.

My prayers go out to Jenni and Nathan's families. I hope that they tell that little boy how special he is every day and remind him how much his mama loved him. I pray he has a long and happy life and is cherished, as he should be. Rest in Peace, Jenni.
01:31 PM on 01/02/2012
Self sacrifice is not noble - buda
01:25 AM on 01/03/2012
Spoken like a truly selfish person. If you were attributing that quote to "Buddha", fine for Buddhists, but most of the Judeo -Christian world feels differently. Even some atheists are willing to sacrifice self for others.
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PiperSniper
09:19 AM on 01/04/2012
I certainly agree with your first sentence. However, your use of "most" christians and "some atheists" made me laugh as all I could picture was "a couple of Muslims" being the next part. Please don't generalise as I'm sure "most people" period feel for this stoic girl and her family.
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mu chowdhury
Truth is elusive
09:24 AM on 01/27/2012
You are right.
Driven by materialistic and monetary happiness,
mother's love for children, sacrifice and other
similar attributes are becoming extinct nowadays.

In these respect, animals are superior to humans, I can bet.

F& F
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Alexander Borschel
01:12 PM on 01/03/2012
Buddhists destroy their self so as to allow for a better one, to serve others better. There is nothing selfish in self-sacrifice, unless made solely for oneself, and for selfish reasons.
05:15 AM on 01/02/2012
Am I the only one thinking of how unlikely it is that doctors really advised her that she couldn't possibly get pregnant and that if this girl was a better decision maker she wouldn't have had to make this sacrifice at all? Judging from the reaction of her family it looks like she comes from a long line of poor decision makers, and personally I find the big sacrifices a lot more inspiring when they're made by someone who's not just blundering from one breathtaking potentially fatal error to the next. We hold this story up as a paragon of virtue at our peril.
09:11 PM on 01/02/2012
Chemo generally kills your eggs, so yes, the Dr. did tell her that she wouldn't be able to get pregnant after chemo. How about not blundering from one breathtakingly ignorant opinion to the next?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
sbblessedbe
And Another Thing....
09:13 PM on 01/02/2012
Wow talk about disrespect. You know nothing about this girl and her family. The doctors probably did tell her that she probably couldn't get pregnant. They tell that to most cancer patients. What decision did she make. Why would you comdemn the whole family for it. How do you know what decions have been in their lives? I can't see where you get that she was "blundering around from one breathtaki­ng potentiall­y fatal error to the next" I have no idea of what your life is, but it has made you very judgmental.
05:12 AM on 01/02/2012
h
11:40 PM on 01/01/2012
What an incredible sacrafice!!! I am so proud of this girl for her courage and commitment to her child. My heart felt prayers go out to her family and may God ease some of your loss with the love of this child.
11:13 PM on 01/01/2012
My one niece discovered she was pregnant then, shortly afterwards, discovered she had cervical cancer. The doctors wanted her to terminate the pregnancy and take chemo, but she refused. While her death occurred several months later, she had already made arrangements with her older sister to raise the baby, since, after one child, her older sister couldn't have anymore.

No greater love has a mother than to be willing to sacrifice her own life so that her child can live on.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
sbblessedbe
And Another Thing....
09:14 PM on 01/02/2012
Amen
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
dollydimple62
Author....reader ,love life.
05:27 PM on 01/03/2012
absolutely...
07:08 PM on 01/01/2012
she gave up her treatments so her baby could live, She was more of a woman than a teen
I'm proud of her for thinking more of her baby than herself.
she could of had an abortion like so many do without the thought of the life within them and so easy for them to kill a life.
God is holding her now God Bless Her
02:03 PM on 01/01/2012
This girl had cancer but became pregnant anyway and had to quit chemo. Now she is dead and the grandmother has a child to raise. I am sorry for everyone involved but I find this action to be very irresponsible.
08:50 PM on 01/01/2012
Ahhh.....Rae.....Pity you didn't gestate long enough to form a complete brain.
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Susan Osterhout Troiano
When arguing, attack the issue, not the person.
09:15 PM on 01/02/2012
This girl was very responsible. If you read the article you will learn she didn't really have a good survival rate. Any one with brain cancer will not survive and her brain cancer went into her spine. All chemo does is make you so sick you can't even live out the rest of your life without being sick. I watched my husband go from finding out he had cancer and he didn't even feel sick until the chemo came. He was so sick right up to his death. That child had the greatest unselfish mother. You on the other hand don't see that.
11:56 PM on 01/02/2012
My sympathies for your loss. I stand by my writing. She was irresponsible for getting pregnant and leaving her baby an orphan for her mother to raise. She wanted a baby so she had one even though she was dying. That is not only irresponsible, but selfish also.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
jdollinter
01:03 PM on 01/01/2012
Hope her message empowers single teenage mothers everywhere, whether you are contemplating your 1st at 15 or 4th at 18, there is a large infrastructure to support you and your babies.
03:09 PM on 01/01/2012
A large infrastructure to support them? That infrastructure has been in the process of being dismantled since Clinton was in office. I truly hope your advice to teens is tongue in cheek. There is nothing empowering about advising young girls to pump out babies they can't provide for. True empowerment is encouraging them to stay in school, get an education, a good job and learning to take care of themselves before they even think about bringing an infant into the world and the most important: If you're going to be sexually active--learn how to use birth control.
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diogenes tub
Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company
04:35 PM on 01/01/2012
What infrastructure??
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April Pells
12:40 PM on 01/01/2012
I wish her family well. I also hope that child does not grow up feeling guilty.
12:35 PM on 01/01/2012
Wow! Never mind all the talk, how many of us are capable of being as strong as young Jenni in the face of life threatening adversity? I hope that her heroic sacrifice can at least be a source of strength to other young mothers to be. She deserves that and she is my newest hero.
http://nutzforstuff.com
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disabled54
facts only
06:52 AM on 01/01/2012
First of all it is not anyones business what this young lady chose to do///it was her body and her love for her unborn child that she made that choice so please just be nice on here and wish her family the best
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
disabled54
facts only
06:45 AM on 01/01/2012
God Bless her what a brave young lady Please do not make this a political thing..... My heart goes out to her family and her child God Bless