"I am, Smoothini," intones the young man in jeans and a baseball cap. "The ghetto Houdini."
"Like Houdini...?" begins America's Got Talent judge Howie Mandel.
There's nothing ghetto, however, about what happens next in the talent competition's June 10 episode.
"Now, the thing about bar magic as opposed to regular magic is the fact that I don't use big props," the former marine and current practitioner of bar magic tells the audience.
"I can't afford them."
He plunks a deck of cards on the judges' table, alongside a salt shaker.
"That's all I have."
The thing that happens with magic that's close to your face," he continues, "is that it has to be performed exquisitely. I can't pronounce that word correctly, but..."
He seems to gag for a moment.
YES, THOSE ARE CARDS POURING OUT OF HIS MOUTH.
Now, he's plucking cards, one at a time, from thin air!
Now, salt is flowing from nothing at all!
And now...! Okayokayokay... It's easy to get excited about magic. Just look at how fast Smoothini's audition has gone ultra-viral.
Since it was posted on YouTube on June 10, the video has burned through 5.5 million views. Okay, so maybe it racks up a lot of re-views — how the bejesus did those cards just pop out of the air? — and a lot of joy-killing analysis from the doubting masses.
"Fake thumb cover clear as day.," writes YouTube muggle Jason Travor.
"Sleight of hand," blares another boor.
We think YouTube user Domino sums it up rightly:
"I hate when people reveal how magic is done. It's like ripping Santa's beard off."
Sing it, Domino.
And let's have another look...