No, seriously. Guys generally are not complex creatures. And they don't tend to ask for much. The occasional electronic gizmo (which they'd rather pick out for themselves anyway, thank you very much). Maybe tickets to a sports game. Perhaps somebody else to mow the lawn for once. Heck, even just a night off to play poker with his buddies.
See what I mean? Guys are easy. Which is why no matter what sort of dad you have, chances are very good that he would love somebody to make him a killer sandwich.
Which is to say, you can't just make him a ham and cheese on white bread. Even basic guys like a great sandwich, emphasis on the great. So we created a sandwich inspired by one of the most famous sandwich-loving dads: Dagwood Bumstead. His version was more difficult to eat — and often twice the size of his head — but we tamed it only slightly. Serve with a pickle spear and a pile of crisp potato chips or french fries.
FATHERS DAY DAGWOOD SANDWICH
Start to finish: 20 minutes
1/4 cup cider vinegar
2 tablespoons sugar
Hefty pinch kosher salt
1/4-inch thick slice red onion, separated into rings
2 slices soft deli-style rye bread
1 slice soft dark pumpernickel bread
Thousand Island or Russian dressing
2 slices deli-sliced turkey
2 slices deli-sliced ham
2 slices provolone cheese
2 tablespoons sliced roasted red pepper, patted dry
2 large leaves romaine lettuce
2 slices pastrami
2 slices Swiss cheese
3 slices crisp-cooked bacon
2 slices tomato
2 tablespoons sliced banana peppers
2 large green olives
In a medium microwave-safe bowl, combine the vinegar, sugar and salt. Microwave on high until simmering, 30 to 45 seconds, then stir to dissolve the sugar. Add the onion rings, stir, cover and set aside for 10 minutes.
Meanwhile, arrange the 2 slices of rye and 1 slice of pumpernickel on the counter. Spread 1 slice rye with light mayonnaise, spread the second slice of rye with deli mustard, then spread the slice of pumpernickel with Thousand Island or Russian dressing.
Start assembling the sandwich with a slice of rye on the bottom. Top with the turkey, ham, provolone and roasted red peppers, in that order. Top with 1 of the leaves of romaine, folding it as needed to fit the sandwich. Add the slice of pumpernickel bread, then top that with the pastrami, Swiss cheese and bacon. Top the bacon with the second leaf of romaine, again folding to fit. Top with the tomato slices and banana peppers.
Drain the onions and pat dry with paper towels. Layer the onions over the sandwich and top with the second slice of rye. Cut the whole sandwich in half, placing a large toothpick topped with an olive into each side to hold it together.
Nutrition information per serving: 980 calories; 470 calories from fat (48 per cent of total calories); 52 g fat (25 g saturated; 0 g trans fats); 185 mg cholesterol; 3,500 mg sodium; 57 g carbohydrate; 8 g fiber; 11 g sugar; 69 g protein.