Listen, empathize, and prepare answers for the media's many questions about your "implausible good looks." That's what politics is all about, according to a satirical letter published by The New Yorker on Saturday, "Campaign Tips, from Justin Trudeau to Bernie Sanders."
"Contention can arise from an issue as innocuous as, say, un-airbrushed shirtless photos floating around the Internet that show off your chiselled body to millions of people," wrote Iain Reid in the fictional letter. "Iâ€™m not here to make any insane allegations, like that these photos arenâ€™t accurate representations of reality, because, yes, they absolutely are... Thatâ€™s just me. With my shirt off. Thatâ€™s literally what I look like, not just in photographs."
Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders speaks at a rally on the campus of Southern Illinois University-Edwardsville on Friday in Edwardsville, Ill. (Photo: Michael B. Thomas/AFP/Getty Images)
The piece pokes fun at the media's focus on Trudeau's looks, while at the same time, focusing only on Trudeau's looks. "You need a thick skin... To have to endure, day after day, week after week, month after month, mobs of reporters; to put up with articles and essays and think pieces... proclaiming how 'sexy' you areâ€”although accurate, itâ€™s all quite wearisome."
Presidential hopeful Sanders could use some actual campaign tips, as he lags farther and farther behind Hillary Clinton, the front-runner for the Democratic nomination. He only has 432 delegates supporting his campaign to Clinton's 1,066, as of Saturday. But as Canada learned with Trudeau's landslide win in October â€” it's not over 'til it's over.
This upcoming week, Trudeau is visiting Washington, D.C., where he will attend a State Dinner hosted by U.S. President Barack Obama.
â€” with files from The Canadian Press