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Author Kelly Williams Brown On How To Be Kind When Other People Aren't

05/18/2017 01:43 EDT | Updated 05/18/2017 01:52 EDT

When it seems like the world is falling apart and every piece of news you read is just straight up sad, it can be hard to stay positive.

Don't try to deny the fact that shade is thrown around these days like confetti. You, a young adult in this questionable world, are just trying to get by and have a nice time in the process. But people are haters. Mean guy at the coffee shop, mean woman at the gym, mean hangry people at work. Mean, mean, mean humans everywhere.

So how can you stay compassionate and considerate when others are killing your vibe? It's a hard question to answer, right?

That's why we got Kelly Williams Brown, author of what should be every adult's bible, "Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps" and "Gracious: How to Embody the Qualities of Charm, Tact, and Etiquette," to give us her top three tips on how to be kind in a world where A LOT of people are dicks jerks.


"But wait! Why should I be kind?" you're asking us. Well, good sir/madame, when you go out into the world with an intention of being gracious (which Kelly says is being present to the humans around you), you will be treated the same way. Recognize everyone's desire to be seen and noticed (so yes, get off your phone), because as Kelly says, goodness is what we want people to have.

Check out Kelly's tips below!

#1 Jerks are like jellyfish

"My friend thinks of mean people as jellyfish, just sort of floating around stinging people," the New York Times-bestselling author told HuffPost Canada. "You can't reason with a jellyfish ... that's when you just have to be like, 'she's a jellyfish! That's what she does.' Think of yourself as a non-stick pan."


#2 It's all about context


One of Kelly's friends gave a great tip on dealing with a hater: "It's always really important to remember I have no idea where that person is coming from and that could be in the last 20 minutes or the last 20 years." At the end of the day, it's important to be kind to people, especially when you don't feel like it, because having the satisfaction to just walk away from a situation where you don't know a person's story and where they're coming from with their anger, is a very good skill.


#3 Keep insults to yourself

"Here's the beauty about thoughts," Kelly tells us. "You can have them and you probably don't necessarily control them." That urge to be rude to someone back? Kelly says take a pause before you do something you'll regret. If you really feel the need to insult someone, do it in your head. All you are in your life are your choices, so choose to be nice.

For more marvelous and kind tips from Kelly Williams Brown, check out the video above!

Also on HuffPost

How To Be Kind