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Dr. Shimi Kang

Psychiatrist and Author

Dr. Shimi Kang is Harvard trained psychiatrist, award winning researcher, speaker, and #1 Bestselling author of The Dolphin Parent: A Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Self- Motivated Kids (Penguin Books) and The Self-Motivated Kid: How to Raise a Child Who Knows What They Want and Goes After It (Without Being Told)(Penguin/Randomhouse). She is the Medical Director for Child and Youth Mental Health for Vancouver and a Clinical Associate Professor at the University of British Columbia. Dr. Kang has helped thousands of people move toward positive behaviors and better health. She is a recipient of the Diamond Jubilee Medal for outstanding community service.
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Lessons I Learned in My Dad's Taxi Cab

Growing up, I was often embarrassed that my dad sometimes drove a taxi because I thought it was not "prestigious." Ironically, it was during my research on motivation at the prestigious Harvard Medical School Addiction Research Program that I realized that much of what motivates me (and all people) comes from lessons I learned from him in that taxi. Here are some of them.
06/16/2014 08:29 EDT
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Are You Parenting 'The Dolphin Way'?

Dolphin parents are not authoritarian pushing parents or hovering Tiger parents (who stifle internal motivation) nor are we permissive spineless Jellyfish (who fail to cultivate impulse control), we recognize we are authority figures and use guidance, role modelling, and a balanced lifestyle to ensure the development of internal motivation, impulse control, and independence.
05/21/2014 01:18 EDT
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Thank You to My Dolphin (Not Tiger) Mom

My mom was not an over-controlling, overbearing tiger mom. Nor was she a permissive, directionless jellyfish mom. My mom was the balance of these extremes and was firm yet flexible. She had rules and expectations -- including clearly expecting us to do well in academics with respectful behaviour. Yet, she also valued our freedom to be kids, individual passions, and independent choices.
05/08/2014 05:44 EDT
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How To Help Your Child Deal With Shyness

Start with displaying some empathy for your child -- which means putting yourself in your kid's shoes. Let them know you understand how they feel and you are not mad or disappointed in them for being shy. Perhaps state something like, "When I was a kid, I was shy too. I remember sometimes it was no fun and got in the way of things I wanted to do. Sometimes I even get shy now."
04/27/2014 10:19 EDT

Why Making Mistakes Is Good For Your Kids

Children who are exclusively rewarded for right answers or who are shunned or punished for making mistakes may become afraid of trying new things. Children are more open to learning and more willing to try harder when they are praised and rewarded for their efforts, not their results.
04/17/2014 06:25 EDT

The Storm of Modern Day Parenting

As we emerge from the torrent of weather storms this winter, I can't help but take note that many of us parents have been caught up in a bigger, perhaps more destructive storm -- that of modern day pa...
03/28/2014 05:05 EDT
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The Four Words Parents Need to Say to Their Kids

As a child, I built a wonderful bond with Mother Nature. Nowadays, when I look at the empty playgrounds and parks near my house, I can tell a lot has changed since my childhood. My parents encouraged my friendship with Mother Nature by telling me to "go outside and play" on a daily basis. Where have all the children gone?
03/26/2014 12:17 EDT
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Don't Ban Bossy, Ban Barbie!

Theoretically, I understand how calling a little girl bossy could possibly deflate her willingness to speak up, however how much does this actually play out in reality? (Because in general, bossy people don't like being told what to do!) More importantly, I see a much bigger culprit against women's leadership flourishing amongst us, the other B-word -- Barbie.
03/21/2014 05:35 EDT
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A Parent's Guide to the Oscars

As a busy mom of three who just finished writing a book, I had little time to watch all the best picture nominated movies so I have been speed-watching what I can this last week. It is amazing what movies can teach us and make us come to terms with.
03/03/2014 12:58 EST
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Using the Olympics to Help Your Kids Learn a "Gold Medal" Attitude

My family had a serious case of Olympic fever. Along with many Canadians, the winter games have become a permanent fixture on our television screen, and a major topic of discussion around the dinner table. The Olympics present valuable learning opportunities for adults and children of all ages. Parents can use these great learning opportunities to foster "a gold medal attitude" for children.
02/24/2014 12:30 EST