Erika Lust2013-05-25T01:04:27-04:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.ca/author/index.php?author=erika-lustCopyright 2008, HuffingtonPost.com, Inc.HuffingtonPost Blogger Feed for Erika LustGood old fashioned elbow grease.Why I Make Porn With "Real" Peopletag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.31766762013-04-29T11:21:20-04:002013-04-29T12:21:14-04:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/
Have you seen the video of Dove's latest social experiment yet? If you can't remember, then you probably haven't since I've yet to hear of someone experiencing a small or indifferent reaction to it.
In truth, the subject matter is hardly breaking news: women's perceptions of themselves tend to be incredibly warped because of our insecurities. Some of us tear up, wondering what our portrait would've been like had we taken part in the study, relating to these women's crippling self-criticism. A few cry out against dove for using such methods to push their brand of beauty products. Still others question the entire message of the experiment, which ends with the offer "you're more beautiful than you think", as highlighting physical rather than character-based qualities.
When I watched the video, it was with a grim nod of understanding. Regardless of who made the video, or why, the problems surrounding women's self image are real and relevant in society. This idea that we're "not enough" is so pervasive in our lives that it's impossible to pinpoint who came up with, and then fed us, this idea. The media? Advertising? Television? Men? Women? Pornography is a common culprit in this day and age. I think this is because it combines many of the things we are most insecure about: sex, intimacy, nakedness and body image. Though I can say with certainty, and maybe even speak for others within the adult industry, that working here has never done anything to dull, damage or skew my admiration for the human body in ALL its forms.
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On a personal level, I was very fortunate in my upbringing never to come up against insurmountable self-esteem issues. It's only now, while raising my own two daughters, that I can fully appreciate how rare this is, and how difficult to avoid.
I grew up in liberal Sweden, I was an active kid, ate well thanks to my mother, my body always seemed to function fine for my purposes, and I had friends with the same mindset. In short, I was lucky. It wasn't until going on exchange in France that this changed dramatically.
There were two girls belonging to my host family, roughly my same age...and obsessed with dieting. What I found incredible, too, was that my host mother seemed completely unperturbed; even when the girls opted out of dinner for diet coke, slim fast and cigarettes.
On a basic level, and as someone from a Northern country where food is salted and stewed, I would never understand why or how a person could refuse the succulent French cuisine. But at this time, a slowly creeping doubt began to wind itself around my brain: if these two girls, roughly my age and stature, needed to diet so badly, what did that mean for me? It felt like I'd waited my whole adolescence to attain womanly curves, and suddenly they might be my worst enemy.
Luckily those thoughts didn't follow me back to Sweden, which makes me feel like I dodged a bullet during those formative years. I won't lie, when I first moved to Barcelona after college, I felt that twinge of insecurity again during my first summer. Blonde, fair, and curvy, I didn't really look like the perpetually tanned, lithe-as-gymnasts Barcelonés crowding the beach every day. So when I began working on assistant production for bigger mainstream companies, what many would consider a trigger for insecurity actually turned out to give the perspective I needed. Picking up the performers at the airport, hanging out with them, witnessing the prep, and generally understanding the process of filmmaking gives you incredible insight on how different these productions (the key word here) are from reality -- the most important being that adult performers are people, just like you and me.
This is something I want to communicate to those who let this idea -- that actors and performers are somehow super-human -- warp their self-image. Obviously I'm not the only one wishing to dispel this idea, since that's exactly what makeup artist Melissa Murphy has been doing for over a month by publishing photos of her adult-star clientele as themselves when they walk in the door, and as their camera-ready "pornified" selves.
In every single set, the performer goes from the fresh-faced girl next door to a dusky-eyed starlet, and it's a real eye-opener for those who have been comparing themselves to something so idealized -- and, let's face it -- homogeneous. It's also encouraging to read those comments that are so supportive, both of the makeup artist's message, and of the performer's natural looks.
Though I'm fascinated by this process and applaud those who want to deconstruct this beauty myth, especially within the adult industry, I prefer in my own work to steer clear of it entirely. The alternative, independent adult community as a general rule prides itself on showing people, and the sex people have, in a more authentic light, something amateur porn is also doing in effect.
And I can't tell you how much more I enjoy my, and my contemporaries', films because they not only show that heterogeneous perspective, but really revel in it. In just about every interview, I get asked about how I started making erotic films for women, and I always reply that I first set out only to make a film for myself. And something I would want to see in good erotica is real, interesting, varied people, because I'm a great believer that everyone is sexy in their own way, and can lead a pleasurable and exciting private life.
So I've found my home in the indie erotic film movement because it reflects my own value that anyone and everyone can and should feel sexy. We are all beautiful, just as Dove says, and we are also all sexual -- so why should sexiness be relegated to a single type? I don't buy it, and this is thanks to a great extent to my career in the adult industry.]]>With More Women in Film, Has Anything Changed?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.23759192012-12-28T12:47:56-05:002013-02-27T05:12:02-05:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/
Sometimes I hate being a natural skeptic. In university, this trait was praised as "critical thought," but away from the world of liberal academia, it's just a killjoy. Like a few weeks ago, when my newsfeed was filled with stories from this year's Sundance Film Festival: "Record Number of Female Directors!" "Women Directors Step Up" "...Rule Over Sundance" etc.
Headlines that put a bounce in my step and make the winter morning just that much brighter, I think to myself.
But halfway through the day, I begin to wonder if the headlines are really true, thinking, "wait, so there's an even number of women directors as there are men... but only in one category? Only in one country?" And while I appreciate that "more than half of the narratives are stories about women," I can't help but feel that, though this is a great thing, it's not representative of the actual state of the Sundance festival or the film industry as a whole.
When that doubtful feeling doesn't go away, I read the articles more carefully. Maybe it bothers me because I'm also a director, maybe because I am not a part of this wave of direction equality in the U.S., maybe it's specifically because I choose to make films about women's sexuality. Either way, after giving my skepticism free reign, and doing a little informal research, my suspicions were confirmed.
There are 12 film categories, containing in total 119 feature-length films as of now. Of which there are approximately 34 women directors or co-directors, and incidentally somewhere in the neighborhood of 34 women-based narratives. This is more the number I was expecting. Of those female narratives, the Sundance programme director says,
"There are a lot of women's stories, and interestingly enough, a lot of those stories exploring sexual relationships. We have had some over the years that have been from a male gaze looking at sexual politics and sexual relationships, but this year we have got a wave of films doing that from a female perspective, which is intriguing and exciting."
Women directing films about sex, and being recognized for it: I can definitely get on board with that. But when perusing the Sundance program, I found it really difficult to understand what the films were truly about, and where the sexual relationships came in. However, what little information I could find about the films centering around women with sexual storylines (regardless of director gender) led to utter disappointment -- did they all just happen to be really dark, or is the female perspective on sex an utter failure? Two lifelong friends, mothers, each having an affair with the other's son. Two stories of older women having affairs with high-school students. One of "the salvation" of a stripper. And finally, a life crisis leading to a world of prostitution. These don't portray female sexuality in a very positive light to me.
What kind of message is this sending -- when women are independent, sexual beings, their lives begin to crumble? It's practically medieval how female sexuality is still associated with devolution and destruction. And it seems (I can't say for sure without having seen the films yet) that many of the Sundance films are falling right into that societal trap. Where is my sexuality represented in all this? How often do we see movies about women's sexuality that are positive and relatable?
The ironic part in all of this, is of course that one of the few sex-positive stories comes from a documentary about what's perceived by many as the dark underbelly of sexuality: kink. Following the giant porn hub kink.com, director Christina Voros strives to shed light and understanding on the sexual practices considered taboo by most, and misused as fuel for the sex-negative camp of thought. Even Voros admits that she had some preconceptions of what the documenting process would be like, saying "I was carrying some baggage about porn. I had a boyfriend who took a job editing soft-core fetish videos... and I lost my mind! But I spent three days talking to (porn) directors, male and female. I found them very relatable, like Princess Donna, who was a gender studies/photography double major at NYU. They were people that I would hang out with -- smart, funny, driven."
I really thought that if lots of new female voices had sprung up this year in the boy's club that is cinema, then a better-rounded perspective on human sexuality would be the result (as with Voros's documentary). And while it's obvious this goal would be a difficult one, I really did get excited at all the headlines -- expecting a major leap forward. As it is, I'll take this year's lineup as another small step towards a very great goal.
Kathryn Bigelow's win for Best Director at the 2010 British Academy Film Awards:
]]>What Sex Sells to Women?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.19132442012-09-27T12:51:20-04:002012-11-27T05:12:01-05:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/
One of the questions I can rely on being asked during most interviews would be, "what do women want?" As a leader in the indie erotica scene, with films and products aimed at a female audience, people seem to think I'd have the answer. Which of course, I don't. I've been incredibly lucky that my vision of lust and sexuality rings true for a lot of people, but that doesn't mean I'm an authority on the subject of pleasure.
Maybe it's just my liberal Swedish upbringing, but I was raised with the belief that sexual preferences were as varied as personality, though it was quickly apparent to me after entering the adult industry 11 years ago that this wasn't the message being broadcasted.
The more women speak out on this topic, the better and more evolved our ideas of sex will be; and there have been several recent developments in this regard:
Firstly are the fabulous efforts by sex-educators and sex-positive activists, who work with a range of media: streaming, television, radio and internet. From Tristan Taormino's podcast "Sex Out Loud", to the wildly popular "Savage Love", Cindy Gallop's site "Make Love, Not Porn" and Vice's series "Pornification", people have a wealth of honest, upfront sex advice like never before. This kind of frank discussion both challenges people's conceptions of sex and empowers individuals to exercise control, safety and enjoyment of their sex life.
It would be impossible for me to outline the recent changes in women's interest and consumption within the sex and adult entertainment worlds without mentioning the phenomenon of the Fifty Shades of Grey novels. If you've checked out my previous posts, then you already know what my objections to the trilogy are.
But, as I hope I relayed in the earlier piece, whatever gets women to open up on the topic of sex is a good thing, regardless of hype or quality. I know women who would've been mortified to discuss sex with relations, but freely admitted to recommending the book to their mother. In terms of my business, there have been undeniable boosts in products like whips, bondage material, spanking powder and kegel beads as a direct result of readers wishing to re-enact or explore the BDSM fantasies portrayed in the trilogy.
Some couples even attribute a rekindling of their relationship to the Fifty Shades novels after boredom in the bedroom developed into a dwindling sex life. One of the most explosive examples of women's willingness to participate in the discourse of sex, one has to marvel at the impact social acceptability has on a topic.
Another example, beyond my own experience running an erotic boutique, of women's increasing role in sex and erotica consumerism can be seen in the film, Magic Mike. For those unfamiliar with it, this semi-autobiographical film about the rise and fall of a male-stripper was a massive success; earning an astounding $39.1 million in it's opening weekend. Of this massive viewership, 78 per cent were women, suggesting that "sex sells" for either gender. Okay, so the film might not win any oscars, nor does it offer us a very complex vision of sexuality, but again, I'm just glad that women are taking advantage of these erotic opportunities.
All evidences that "leading by example" is more than just the anecdote of after-school specials and those youth assemblies you never heeded. With this in mind, I don't believe any single person can say what women want, but I can say with certainty that women do want. And the sooner society, media and business realize that this is the case, that men aren't the only sexual beings, the sooner we'll have greater variety to choose from and representations that reflect us.]]>How Julian Assange Made it Harder for Women to Report Rapetag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.18386662012-08-29T11:46:36-04:002012-10-29T05:12:04-04:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/the topic of rape -- how it's defined, prosecuted and who can commit it. As the headlines have already informed, Wikileaks founder Julian Assange faces an Interpol order for his extradition to Sweden for the crime of sexual assault and one of illegal coercion which were reported in 2010 and have only recently resulted in charges.
At that time, he was speaking at a seminar organized by the Brotherhood Movement, and seeking work and residence permits in Stockholm (possibly due to Sweden's strong laws for media protection and journalistic shield). It was only four days later that allegations of rape began, but charges dropped and Assange left for England. He is currently in London's Ecuadorian embassy after being granted asylum, claiming that, if returned to Sweden, he would then be extradited to the U.S. where severe charges, or even death, would await him.
This case infuriates me: as a Swedish woman, a feminist, and someone who works to promote sex as passionate and beautiful act within the adult industry. Born and raised in Sweden, I can attest to my country's excellent laws protecting women's health and rights, which gives us the confidence to report such trauma and also that the system will pursue justice in our case.
In a 2009 study by the European Commision, the number of rapes reported in Sweden was 46 per 100,000 citizens. Its definition of rape is broad and it was one of the first countries in Europe to recognize and criminalize spousal rape in 1965. The incident of rape in any country is a horrible thing, but I am particularly proud to come from a culture that encourages its women to speak out about their experiences in an effort to eliminate the act.
"When Julian Assange was first arrested, we were struck by the unusual zeal with which he was being pursued for rape allegations... whether or not Assange is guilty of sexual violence, we do not believe that is why he is being pursued. Once again women's fury and frustration at the prevalence of rape and other violence is being used by politicians to advance their own purposes."
While I understand that their stance is one denouncing a judicial system which ordinarily minimizes or badly defines the crime of rape, I can't help but be astonished. Despite being advocates of sexual assault survivors, it feels as though they, as with all the Assange supporters through their actions, are saying that these rapes are not crimes in their own right, but rather can be used falsely and as a scapegoat. This effectively minimizes everything Sweden is doing to encourage women to speak out, especially in this case where the alleged rapist is a well-known figure, by indicating that even rape support groups won't believe that you don't have ulterior motives.
Rape is a gross power play and the message to victims needs to be that, though they were violated, they can regain control through reporting their rape. I understand that many have no faith in the legal and political system, and that Assange is responsible for a lot of disillusionment in this regard. However, what I cannot reconcile the idea that "we want rapists caught, charged and convicted... But does anyone really believe that extraditing Julian Assange will strengthen women against rape?" No buts. I want him to answer to the charges, and it's the men I want to strengthen against rape: the politicians, popular figures, and citizens alike.
It doesn't seem very far fetched to me that even a global champion of human rights and free information can be chauvinistic in their private lives. In fact, the public and private spheres rarely tend to be related -- particularly when sex is involved -- and it is the powerful figures who tend to think they are persecuted for who they are, rather than fair legal issues, while simultaneously being untouchable.]]>Fifty Shades of Male Fantasy? No Thankstag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.16979452012-07-24T11:33:51-04:002012-09-23T05:12:09-04:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/Fifty Shades of Grey could be a massive help to women authors of erotica to gain some recognition within a widespread audience.
But inevitably, the success of the novels inspired lots of criticism, little of which led me to believe the books had any real merit beyond "being a hot read." What a shame that others in my field not only admitted that, as a cultural phenomenon, the books were considered required reading despite it's terrible quality, but also that they were capitalizing on a very unrealistic story of BDSM. That in turn only furthers the divide between what erotica is being popularized now versus what other women are writing, thereby hurting the cause for women authors rather than supporting it.
In my first piece for the Huffington Post, I wrote about the positive aspects of a BDSM sexual relationship. As I outlined, the most important components to safe and fun kink are open communication and enthusiastic consent, which obviously applies to every other kind of sexual relationships as well. Imagine how dismayed I was then after finding out that this wildly popular series not only represented a relationship devoid of those components, but also some of the most male-driven fantasies and sexual stereotypes!
First, there's the "virgin" thing: I mean how many women out there truly have a romantic notion of the first time after the fact? I recently heard an anecdote that went something like, "sex is a lot like making pancakes, the first one off the griddle is never the best" and for most I think that holds very true. So, this is definitely a male fantasy of initiation. In addition, although Christian, the dominant male protagonist, makes it clear that he wants a BDSM relationship by presenting Anastasia a contract, she never signs it, indicating both a lack of interest in the practice, and refusing to communicate what her needs and preferences were by even negotiating the terms.
Finally, there is the classic element of a woman dealing with abuse (which is essentially what it was, given a lot of his behavior and her refusal to sign the contract or otherwise indicate her consent) with the ultimate goal of saving the damaged man. And that's really the most stunning part of the story to me: suggesting that the only reason Christian practiced BDSM was because he had faced some sort of trauma, which doesn't paint this type of sex in a flattering light at all. How can it simultaneously entice readers by promising erotic scenes of spanking and bondage, whilst simultaneously transmitting the message that you'd have to be sick to enjoy it?
So I guess what I'm actually disappointed by isn't even the bad representation of BDSM, but the use of it as an angle and guise for what is really a story of traditional chauvinist values. The blend of the two very opposite things, and the resulting popularity branding it as mainstream is totally perplexing. It really reminded me of how conflicted I felt after Kathryn Bigelow was awarded Best Director at the Oscars -- so happy that a brilliant woman was finally recognized in an industry dominated by men, with which I can definitely sympathize, and yet disgruntled that it was in recognition of a war movie devoid of any female protagonists or perspective.
Doubtless her direction was brilliant, but I truly wonder whether the masculine subject matter made the decision to award her easier... as opposed to say, Sofia Coppola or Jane Campion, both of whom were nominated for, but failed to receive, the same award in 2003 and 1993 respectively, and whose movies represent more feminist themes and feminine perspectives.
If you're like me, and the whole idea of the popular trilogy just leaves a bad taste in your mouth, I suggest looking into other erotica -- and there is a huge, well-penned selection out there that represents a more fresh and modern take on sex, rather than just a Disney fairytale that's dressed up in leather. A great compilation of suggested titles by sex-educator and blogger Violet Blue are a favourite. And if you're more of a visual person interested in the true sex appeal of BDSM, check out my 2009 short, Handcuffs, filmed in Barcelona and based on true events.]]>The Kind of Porn You SHOULD be Watchingtag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.16059652012-06-19T08:01:43-04:002012-08-19T05:12:08-04:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/
According to a recent New York Times article, there are parents who agree with me on this. Okay, so I doubt many have had the same kind of premeditation on the subject or it's broaching as I have (see my last blog post), but I was so impressed by how the parents interviewed chose to deal with "the talk" after it became evident that their child had seen, or was interested in porn. And just like the most successful "drug talks" I've heard of, the parents with whom I was most impressed chose to educate their child in the most informative, supportive, judgment-free environment possible.
On the heels of this article arrives one by the Los Angeles Times, a five questions piece regarding the recent book The Demise of Guys: Why Boys Struggle and What We Can Do About It and the authors' findings that great exposure to pornography (as well as video games, interestingly enough) leaves young men isolated and socially stunted. I won't argue this point, but I would like to add that this would probably occur under specific conditions: those being that viewing porn without any context, and without any real-world experience can be a very confusing thing.
This is because the current state of mainstream porn is sad. From what I've seen, it rarely represents the typical human sexual experience in any way, and without that element of reality, reflects a kind of parallel universe of hairlessness, bleaching, diminutive speech, athleticism: a formula devoid of much pleasure, ending in ejaculation. I imagine teens being transfixed by this parallel universe, much like young children who reach up to touch the Sesame Street puppets shown on the TV screen, completely unaware that the images are in no way real. Regardless of one's sex politics, I think there are few parents who want their children to think that that's how sex is or ought to be.
Maybe, as the Los Angeles Times interview suggests, there needs to be a closer marriage of reality and porn, something that brings it out from the shadows of isolation and instead adds to a person's social wellbeing. All I can suggest, as I so often do, is seeking and promoting good porn. Something that leaves the viewer feeling good about their experience, rather than bad or confused. One parent from the New York Times article even went so far as to offer their child a couple of websites that they thought were appropriate, which would both offer their teen an outlet for their interest, and represent a positive sexual experience.
It reminded me of a recent interaction I had in nearby Girona, during an art house screening of my latest movie, Cabaret Desire. Two middle-aged fans approached me to sign a copy of the DVD and we chatted. When I asked to whom I should make out the signature, the woman stated that it was for her son. "He's sixteen, he watches porn anyway -- so he'd better be watching this!"
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm thrilled when parenting and sexuality intersects, and appreciate the debates and conversations that arise when it does. So I'm particularly excited when two large news publications cover the topic of porn and parenting back-to-back like this. These discussions remind us that, just like one can't rely on TV to be a babysitter, one can't rely on porn to be their child's sole sex-educator. That information has to come from the parent before they seek porn or have sex, and then maybe they'll have a chance to be able to distinguish between good and bad porn, reality and fantasy, and leave them more connected to others and the outside world.]]>How I Will Tell My Daughters I Work in Porntag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15622662012-06-04T04:00:55-04:002012-08-03T05:12:17-04:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/
The feminine voice is marginal in the discourse of porn, which has been expressed in masculine (and often chauvinist) terms for more than four decades. But in these last few years, other young directors and I have successfully demonstrated that another kind of adult film is possible: one where the woman is the protagonist and her pleasure has importance, where the roles that represent us aren't those of the prostitute, Lolita, nurse, babysitter, nymphomaniac... where, finally, the men aren't the stereotype of the f--king machine, where the styling and the locations make sense, where there are stories about feelings and passion, where the sex (although explicit) is human and beautiful, and not gynecological or athletic. We are successfully producing porn that is a pleasing experience in both aesthetics and ethics, so far beyond traditional porn, which is so often offensive, violent and displeasing.
I truly believe that if I were a man, I wouldn't receive the constant moral questioning I referred to initially: about what my parents think and how I'm going to tell my girls, but we already know that being a woman, even today, has it's ups and downs. I think that I was even judging myself at first, and because of it I had to resist telling my parents, who live in Stockholm, while I was safely away in Barcelona. But they had Internet and my mother, who I had believed incapable of using Google at 70 years old, searched for "Erika Lust" and forced it to come out. But both she and my father surprised me with a very positive reaction, and showed me they understood that there was a very important, very radical difference between my work and traditional porn. They would certainly have been more comfortable if I'd been a lawyer, professor or architect -- at least it would have been easier to talk about their daughter's work with their friends.
Regarding my daughters, I have to admit that I haven't thought about it at all, since the oldest is four and the youngest is one. But I feel that when the moment arrives, there won't be a problem: My work is honest, innovative and has a cause. Not only for the content and message of the movies I make, but also because the sex-positive feminism with which I identify, and which defends the idea that sexual freedom is an essential component to women's rights. And I think porn that is intelligent, respectful of women, contemporary and thoughtful actually contributes to women's full sexual liberation.
Society is always trying to control and oversee our sexuality, as it does with everything else. Sometimes it's the state, many times it's the church, sometimes the more radical feminists, the conservatives and the male chauvinists; all have their motives for controlling us. Their objective is to limit our sexuality to family and reproduction, with the intention that sex should never seem fun; should it, we become dangerous and unworthy of respect in their eyes.
Many times pornography is accused of being the lowest product of society, and of transmitting the worst values; but we shouldn't forget about television, cinema, advertising, fashion, all of which quite often transmit negative messages about a woman's body and breed confusion about gender and sexuality.
Fathers, mothers, teachers, aunts, friends, grandmothers, all of these in fact transmit values about sex and gender to children. We must all (including those in porn) think about what we say and how we say it, until the end of their childhood or early adolescence.
I want my daughters to learn that sex is life and pleasure, not just the risk of disease and unwanted pregnancy. I will tell them that I am a writer and director of films, and this my movies talk about love, about men and women who desire each other, about passion and sex. And of course I have to tell them what sex is, but this isn't just me, it's all of the fathers and mothers in the world! If we learn to explain what sex is to our children tactfully and in a natural, intelligent manner, we avoid that first explanation being from Nacho Vidal or Rocco Sifreddi. Or in the case of my friend, from Google, when her eight-year-old son and an older friend searched the web for "bitch".
When they are adolescents and a boyfriend shows them a porn film, I want my daughters to be able to decide what they like and what they don't: to be critical, to laugh if necessary, and ideally, to show the boys a different kind of film, one that they prefer instead.]]>CHANGE MY MIND: Should Modern Women Feel Empowered by S&M Porn?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15035572012-05-09T13:36:22-04:002012-07-09T05:12:04-04:00Erika Lusthttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/erika-lust/Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James -- a book which focuses on the relationship between a recent college graduate, and a young businessman with a sexual penchant for BDSM -- people are asking themselves whether this is a topic that empowers the modern woman, or is a fantasy which promotes their degradation and exploitation.
Are ropes, chains and handcuffs in the bedroom the literal shackles of sexism? Or do they represent an enlightened sense of self and choice amongst modern women?
Should we, as a society, accept this particular fetish as being a powerful tool for women to assert themselves today, or should we stand in opposition to it, and denounce it as not only a patriarchal construct, but a violent and demeaning one as well?
Erika Lust, an award-winning erotic director and writer, and Dawn Hawkins, executive director of Porn Harms and Morality in Media, wrestle over the issue below. Who changes your mind?
