Natalie Strouth2013-06-18T18:25:39-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.ca/author/index.php?author=natalie-strouthCopyright 2008, HuffingtonPost.com, Inc.HuffingtonPost Blogger Feed for Natalie StrouthGood old fashioned elbow grease.Ask Elizabeth: How Can I Support My Wife Who Has Cancer?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.33913932013-06-05T17:22:33-04:002013-06-05T17:26:16-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Brad asks: My wife Karen was recently diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer. After getting over the initial shock, we've told our friends and family. We want to help but Karen gets frustrated when any of us try to do things for her, with the kids or around the house. She mentioned wanting to join a support group, but I worry this will be depressing. I don't know how to be strong as the best husband, caregiver, and deal with my own fears about what's happening. Can anyone be a 'super caregiver'? Do you have any advice for me?
Your mixed emotions as Karen's husband, and now her caregiver, are completely normal and to be expected. You're trying your best to be supportive and strong when your wife needs you most, and not fall apart, despite your own fears. I won't overgeneralize, but there are some studies that find many male caregivers have a harder time asking for help, discussing their feelings, or talking about their caregiving situation at work. This is especially hard when appointments, caregiving responsibilities, and the inevitable bad days require time away from work.
Support is really a personal experience. Giving your wife the freedom and space to explore her feelings and how she is best going to manage them is really important. Sharing your feelings and listening may not come naturally. It is typically much easier to just try and "fix it." Switching the focus from fixing things to being there will take a lot of pressure off of yourself and help direct your energy.
You need to get support for yourself from family, friends and your health care team so that you can be there. Even though you may not see the value in joining a support group, it could be the perfect place for your wife to gain perspective, connect with others and share her feelings and experiences.
First and foremost, support groups give people a safe place to express their fears. This is more powerful that you may think. At first it might seem difficult to tell your story to a group, but there is something empowering about saying it out loud, and owning your own cancer journey. Listening to others and giving compassion and encouragement to people who know where you are coming from, and maybe even sharing a laugh, can be the best medicine some days.
Finding a support group that you like and that suits your personality may seem daunting at first, especially if you don't feel like much of a "joiner." The decision will be a personal one, but there is no doubt that this diagnosis will change both of you in different ways. Your wife might feel driven to find and connect with others like her, who are travelling the same road, and to research everything. However, I've also talked to people who don't yet know where they fit in their new patient world. There is nothing wrong with this.
Support groups are not all the same. Some people like the energy and connection of talking in person with a larger group. Others, like introverts who prefer more intimate conversations with one or two people, find great solace and people who lift them up through social media and online patient communities.
A support community, whether virtual or in person, can bring grace, inspiration, strength and comfort in ways you never imagined. If you or your wife are thinking about it, try it! If a support group doesn't work out, she doesn't have to continue. There are many options for creating a circle of support.
To help you in your caregiving role, ask health care providers many questions and learn all that you can about your wife's cancer, so that you can be a strong advocate. Tell your employer what is going on. Take time to care for yourself and watch for signs of caregiver burnout. You need to be in good health, both mentally and physically, to face the road ahead together.
The Canadian Cancer Society offers:
Online support through Cancer Connection.
One on One Support -- Connect by phone or in person to a cancer survivor or caregiver whose experience most closely resembles your own. Call 1-888-939-3333 or TTY 1-866-786-3934, Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. or email peersupport@ontario.cancer.ca.
Above all, remember this...the secret in care for your wife is in caring for your wife.
Send your caregiving question to askelizabeth@saintelizabeth.com. Answers may appear in an upcoming weekly column. Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.]]>Ask Elizabeth: Should the Elderly Fear Falling?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.33196952013-05-22T11:11:37-04:002013-05-22T12:17:30-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Todd asks: My parents are getting older and recently, mom has become afraid of falling. She often talks about friends who have taken a spill, and whenever they come over she tells me we should have a railing for our front steps. She's even avoiding rooms where our kids' toys are on the floor. Neither one of them have had a fall -- how worried should we be about this?
My husband called to wish his 92-year-old grandmother a happy birthday last week. It sounded like a pleasant conversation from what I could hear, but he hung up with a sigh and a confused look on his face. When I asked if everything was okay, he chuckled and said, "Somehow our conversation went from being very cheery and happy to her scolding me about the dangers of falling. She warned me to be very, very careful to not fall... because if I do, I will never be the same again. Doesn't she realize I'm only 36 -- what's the big deal?"
His conversation got me thinking about my own family -- my grandfather at 89 years old went from living independently, driving, caring for his home and my dependent grandmother to having to give up his driver's license and his home, moving into a retirement home and using a walker at all times -- he was never the same because of one simple slip.
I found this startling statistic from the Public Health Agency of Canada: "About one in three Canadian seniors will experience a fall at least once each year. Such falls are the leading cause of injury-related hospitalizations among older people. Apart from causing injury, falls can result in chronic pain, reduced quality of life and, in severe cases, death. Psychological effects of a fall may cause a post-fall syndrome that includes dependence on others for daily activities, loss of autonomy, confusion, immobilization and depression."
At Saint Elizabeth we have found that the time of year can increase your risks of falls. There is a somewhat surprising trend that seniors fall more often in the spring and summer than in the winter. Robin Hurst, Saint Elizabeth's Advanced Practice Consultant for Seniors and Mental Health, feels this is attributed to how "the warm weather encourages older adults to get outside. In the spring and summer we receive more reports of older adults falling off of decks, falling while going in and out of buildings, and going for walks. We recommend older adults and their family members review how safe their outside environment is, install safety railings on their decks, and be cautious when walking outdoors."
Also consider if your mom and dad have some of the risk factors for falls. For instance, are either of them:
over the age of 65
living with vision or hearing problems
taking medications to help them sleep or calm their nerves
living with dementia
having problems with balance or difficulty walking
having difficulty getting in and out of the tub
experiencing mood or memory changes, or symptoms of depression
Your mom's fear of falling is warranted but the good news is that checking medications, having conversations about preventing falls, and encouraging her to keep active with exercise that improves strength and balance can all help. Her doctor or health care provider can help determine the right kind of exercise for her.
Finding Balance is a great web site to help seniors prevent falls before they happen.
Although there are plenty of valuable strategies for preventing falls, they can't stop every older adult from ever falling (even if it's just an ungraceful spill) -- nor can my 36-year-old husband guarantee his grandmother that he won't lose his balance. Your mom's fear of falling is actually quite typical, and warranted, for her age. Instead of overly limiting her activities, which some studies show can actually lead to a fall, your mom can be cautious and avoid those toys on the floor, determine safe physical activities to maintain her strength and balance, and address any risk factors. We could all be better off to do the same!
Send your caregiving question to askelizabeth@saintelizabeth.com. Answers may appear in an upcoming weekly column. Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: Can People Live Safely at Home with Alzheimer's?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.32796232013-05-15T17:28:04-04:002013-05-15T17:28:12-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Rebecca asks: My grandmother is getting older and was recently diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's Disease. She is still very healthy and independently living on her own. We have talked about her desire to remain at home and independent for as long as she can. How can we keep her safe in her home?
First, I think it's wonderful that your grandmother is still very independent and enjoying her usual activities, as are many people living with early stage Alzheimer's or dementia, and that your family respects her choice to remain independent as long as possible. This is really important. However, I can empathize that the changes ahead with her memory are likely scary and unsettling.
Right now it's important to focus on what she can do, and to develop strategies for successfully doing the activities that she may find harder to do. Although she may only need a bit of help right now, it's important to plan ahead for care she will need in the future.
Consider arranging help with tasks around the house like housekeeping, meal preparation or transportation. Speak to a local community support organization, home health care organization or health care authority.
Also, create a list of phone numbers of people who help her already, what tasks they help with, when they visit, and how to get in touch with them. Post this list near her phone.
If your grandmother starts to show signs of getting easily overstimulated, having difficulty following conversations, or a limited attention span, help her to pick activities she can manage. Breaking tasks into smaller steps can be helpful. Maintaining social connections is very important, but you may find that one-on-one or small group settings are easier.
Organization tips:
Talk to her bank manager about "bank at home" services. Arrange for direct deposit of cheques and automatic withdrawal for bills, if this is not already in place.
Designate an obvious place to keep keys, such as a large bowl in the hall, and leave an extra set with a trusted neighbour.
Label cupboards with words or pictures that describe what is inside. For instance, dishes, knives and forks, cereal.
Clean out closets and dresser drawers to only include necessary items. This will make it easier to find items and make daily decisions, such as what to wear.
Write emergency contact information and important telephone numbers in large print and post them by the phone. Also program these names and numbers into her phone.
Keep a pad of paper to write down "Things to Remember" handy at all times.
Have a daily newspaper delivered to remind your grandmother of the date.
Use electronic aids such as alarm clocks, timers and cell phones to help manage the changes that are happening in day-to-day life.
Safety tips:
Use electrical appliances that shut off on their own.
Install smoke and carbon monoxide detectors and check the batteries regularly.
Leave written reminders like "turn off the stove" or "unplug the iron." Place them where they will be seen frequently and easily.
Have her keep a map of where her home is.
Have medications organized in a weekly bister pack or dosette and delivered on a regular schedule.
Having a diagnosis of dementia, or caring for somebody who does, is a big adjustment. However, there are many strategies and tools available to help people live well with dementia. Maintaining a healthy lifestyle, such as proper nutrition, physical and mental activity, can enhance your grandmother's ability to manage the changes she is experiencing.
Here are some additional resources to support people with dementia and their family partners in care -- and help you prepare for the road ahead:
Send your caregiving question to askelizabeth@saintelizabeth.com. Answers may appear in an upcoming weekly column. Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: Caregiving as an Only Childtag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.32010302013-05-02T17:25:26-04:002013-05-02T17:25:42-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Sandra asks: My mom's health has been deteriorating greatly over the past year. As an only child, I am her primary caregiver and this last hospital stay has really taken a toll on me. She gets very limited formal help and the rest of her care is left to me. I am so tired and can't concentrate on anything any more.
My colleague, Cathryn, was happy as an only child, and felt no need for brothers or sisters while she was growing up. But when her parents divorced and her grandparents developed serious health issues that consumed her mother's time as a primary caregiver for seven years, Cathryn suddenly felt panicked and alone. She needed someone to not only share the current emotional burden, but for the first time she realized what lay ahead. With a young family and a demanding job, she worried about how she will cope as an only child in the future when her own mother needs more care.
Research tells us that the demands placed on caregivers often means that they face significant health problems themselves. Caregivers, on average, take more medications and have higher levels of depression and stress than people who are not caregivers. They are also less likely to take proper care of themselves, for instance getting regular exercise or going to the doctor.
The good news is, only children who are caring for aging parents -- and all caregivers, for that matter -- can find tremendous support by tapping into a network of friends, family, and community members.
No one can do everything themselves, especially an only child. When you are both mentally and physically exhausted, you are less able to provide a good level of care. Exhaustion and burnout does not in any way mean that you are a bad caregiver, it just means that you have reached your limits and have no more internal resources.
1. Build your own 'sibling' support system of friends, spouses, even your own children. Knowing that it's OK to ask for help is key to providing care and advocating for yourself and your mother.
2. Shore up support from community resources:
Local crisis lines and intervention programs
Have a financial planner. The costs of caregiving can really add up when you don't have others to share them with, and planning is essential.
Call 211 for information and referrals to local home and community supports
Government funded home care programs
Respite care, local retirement or long term care facilities
Not-for-profit community support organizations
3. Get support from caregiver groups and relief programs. Of course, there is no single way to do this. The needs over caregivers are often overlooked, and they depend on many variables: the demands of caregiving, which change over time; your caregiver's family, financial and work circumstances, your emotional temperament and response to stress; your relationship with the person being cared for, and resources available, among many other factors.
Saint Elizabeth recently undertook a research project involving family caregivers to identify caregivers' unique needs and what good support looks like in different scenarios. A key recommendation was that caregiver support programs need to ask caregivers what they need and then tailor services accordingly.
Joining a support network ensures you have people to talk to who understand what you are going through is invaluable. If you don't think attending a support group is the right fit for you, there are online groups as well that offer a sense of connection and solace.
Caring for someone else can be one of the most rewarding and uplifting journey we can take however as with everything there are something that can be done to set yourself up for success and avoid the pitfalls that lead many to burnout and exhaustion.
Some only children may actually find some benefits to their situation, such as no disagreements with siblings over care planning, no feeling of resentment if siblings don't all contribute to caregiving responsibilities, and the ability to make decisions themselves.
Make time for yourself too. Caregiving breaks are necessary, and don't always require large blocks of time. Try these Creative Ways to Take Caregiving Breaks.
You may want to read this recent post in the New York Times' New Old Age blog, "Suddenly, They're All Gone." Carol Mithers reflects on her caregiving emotions and experiences, from the other side, in an insightful and beautifully written piece.
Send your caregiving question to askelizabeth@saintelizabeth.com. Answers may appear in an upcoming weekly column. Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: How Do I Care for my Dad with Parkinson's?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.31487992013-04-24T17:00:00-04:002013-04-24T17:20:04-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Daughter, plus caregiver and nurse; we may think about our parents getting older, but when they start needing more support are we really prepared? Does it seem to creep up on us?
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Catherine asks: How do I care for my dad as his physical health deteriorates? His Parkinson's is advancing and he needs more and more help. I feel unprepared and anxious, but I want to be able to care for him as long as possible.
The shift from our parents caring for us to us caring for them is a difficult one, but you are not alone! Many caregivers report that they feel better prepared and less anxious when they are equipped with information about the skills and tasks that may be required of them as caregivers. Here are some key tips to begin providing the practical help your parents need:
1. Ask for help. Many caregiving tasks and skills may be new to you, like lifting and moving someone or coordinating medical care. These skills are sometimes far more complex than they initially appear. For instance, driving an elderly person to an appointment is not just about hopping into the car and going for a drive - it may involve dressing the person, transferring them into and out of a wheelchair, into the car and out again, and avoiding potential safety risks. This activity requires many different skills! Ask health care professionals lots of questions, such as a nurse, personal support worker, or occupational therapist, as they have knowledge and experience with these tasks.
2. Create a support team of family and friends. They are wonderful resources, especially if they have been through a similar situation. Your brother who lives further away might not be able to drive to medical appointments but he can organize important financial and legal documents. Your friends can be a sounding board when you feel overwhelmed. Support groups and local community support organizations are also great resources for learning new skills and sharing experiences that will help you gain confidence and ease your worries.
3. Safety first. Looking at your loved one's physical environment can reveal many opportunities to make life easier and safer for them, and to increase your confidence as a caregiver. There are many assistive devices and mobility aids designed to make tasks such as transferring, walking, eating or bathing more efficient and comfortable.
4. Involve the person you care for in making decisions. Respect the person's choices, even when you don't agree with them. As long as there is no risk of danger to themselves or others, it is important to support them in making their own decisions.
5. Try not to focus just on the physical needs. People still need to feel connected to others around them and to participate in activities just like they did before they became ill or lost some independence. By making them feel part of normal household and social activities, and by encouraging hobbies such as music, games or crafts, you may also have some much-needed time for yourself.
Reach out and learn as much information as possible to feel confident and empowered in your caregiving role. Caregiving may last a few months, or several years, so you need to take care of your own health too. Hopefully your support system will include immediate family, but remember that home and community care services can help, as can online support communities.
The important thing is to find what works for you to provide the best possible care for your family.
Care-ring Voice is a free, bilingual program that offers learning sessions by telephone on a range of topics for caregivers and families.
Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: Can Your Aging Parents Still Live Alone?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.31010942013-04-17T12:45:59-04:002013-06-17T05:12:01-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Have you had "the talk" (or series of talks) with your parents about them getting older, and where they want to live? We know overwhelmingly that Canadians want to live at home for as long as possible -- and yet many of us don't plan early and learn about options for our families until a crisis occurs.
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Ryan asks: At Easter this year I looked around my parent's house and realized that they are not going to be able to live here forever. My dad recently had a knee replacement and my mom's been diagnosed with high blood pressure. When do you start talking to your parents about the future and where they going to live as they age?
It's a big mental leap to watch our parents age and realize that the changes they are experiencing will impact their ability to care for themselves and their home. For some, the ability to cope without help at home is a slow decline. For others it comes as a sudden change that requires immediate decisions about where and how we want to live. Here are some strategies that may help open the discussions:
Start now talking with parents about their wishes. Where, and how, do they want to live as they age? What's important to them? Help your parents consider their older years as a chance to have new experiences, downsize their homes and enjoy the things that really matter to them more.
A close family member of mine went through a very difficult experience with her parents because she had never had these conversations. Their difficult decisions had to be made in the midst of a crisis. Her advice is to "talk openly and honestly about future living options early, and research these carefully... take into consideration geography, financial requirements or constraints, and in-home support. Leaving this decision until an emergency occurs (a major fall, broken hip, etc.) puts too much stress on the elderly person and the family, and may force multiple moves into less desirable locations."
These conversations will make transitions easier to navigate when the time comes.
Take a look around their house together. Discuss possible renovations or changes to adapt the home to changing needs. Talk about who could help with home and yard maintenance, such as family members, friends and neighbours.
Don't be surprised if this is very overwhelming for your parents, especially if they have lived in the same home for decades and raised your family there. You may want to break down tasks into manageable pieces like de-cluttering, staging a home for selling, modifying or renovating in stages -- and reinforce who can help them with these things.
Have candid discussions about financial resources. This will help to forecast how their assets will cover the accommodation and level of care your parents want (e.g., home care, assisted living, long term care).
If your parents are moving into alternative housing, I suggest you explore housing options early on. Your parents should be involved in learning about what is available, such as visiting an open house or event at a local adult community, joining a local seniors centre, or exploring volunteer opportunities at a long term care facility.
I can't stress enough how much preparation can help prevent a crisis and ensure your parents are safe and comfortable as they age.
The Care Guide is a comprehensive guide to seniors' housing and care services across Canada.
Senioropolis.com is a comprehensive directory of retirement homes, retirement communities and long-term care homes throughout Canada.
Send your caregiving question to askelizabeth@saintelizabeth.com. Answers may appear in an upcoming weekly column. Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: Sometimes with Caregiving, the Crisis Is How You Feeltag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.30612072013-04-11T12:15:26-04:002013-06-11T05:12:02-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Caring for someone can involve juggling a host of mental, physical and emotional dynamics. Sometimes you just need someone to talk to. Our Ask Elizabeth* advice column has some resources that may be helpful.
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Sandra asks: My daughter is the joy of my life but sometimes I feel incredibly stressed by the daily responsibilities and challenges of her disability. What can I do when I feel like this?
Being a parent is a 24/7 job, and caring for a child with special needs is even more so. While it is a deeply rewarding experience, the emotional, social and physical impacts of caring for a medically fragile child can't be denied.
As a community nurse I have worked with many families whose primary focus is one child or adult's medical issues, and they are often overwhelmed by trying to manage day-to-day tasks. What complications and worries are they dealing with that day? How will the house get cleaned this week? Is the other sibling feeling neglected? Will they ever feel organized and peaceful when they walk in their door?
Your mental health is vital as her parent and caregiver. You -- and the many people across the country who are caregivers for children, spouses, parents or other family and friends -- need to know there is somewhere you can turn for emotional support and guidance when dealing with the ups and downs.
Crisis lines are free and available 24 hours-a-day, 7 days-a-week across Canada. A crisis line provides professional support to anyone experiencing a change in their ability to cope, at any time. The people who run crisis lines believe that no problem is too big or too small.
When you call a crisis line, you:
only have to talk about things with which you are comfortable;
can ask questions and find out what help is available;
do not have to give your name, and you can hang up at any time;
can request to talk to someone face-to-face in your home or community.
I have talked to many people who feel hesitant to call a crisis line. The word "crisis" can sound scary, and you may not relate to the term, yet the people who run crisis lines believe that no problem is too big or too small. At Saint Elizabeth, our own crisis staff have talked to caregivers on a range of topics, from listening about daily challenges and frustrations, to providing guidance on specific and delicate situations.
Remember, you are not alone. Call a crisis line to connect to a trained professional who is compassionate, understands your situation and can refer you to helpful services or connect you with immediate support.
Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.]]>Ask Elizabeth: Finding Mobility Aids for Stroke Survivors on a Budgettag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.30012392013-04-02T15:59:39-04:002013-06-02T05:12:01-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Coming home from the hospital following an illness or surgery can be overwhelming in an already stressful time and it's important to have a plan based on your needs. Who will help you recuperate at home? Is there anyone who can help you understand how to manage new medications?
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Maria asks: My husband had a stroke and is coming home from the hospital. I'm really worried about how we will afford everything the hospital has recommended for him to recover at home. How can I find equipment, like mobility aids, on a fixed budget?
Ensuring our family members are safe and independent is very important. I have received many inquiries through Ask Elizabeth from people who share your concerns and are looking for resources. The cost of purchasing and maintaining equipment like wheelchairs or bed rails can have a huge impact on families.
Many types of assistive and mobility equipment may improve your husband's safety and independence, including:
manual and power wheelchairs
canes, crutches and walkers
super poles, bed rails, bath benches and rails, raised toilet seats
patient floor lifts
electronic aids for daily living that assist with answering the phone, turning on the lights, opening and closing doors etc.
face-to-face communication devices for non-verbal adults
Fortunately, health care professionals involved with the purchase or rental of equipment understand the hardships you are facing. Doctors, nurse practitioners, occupational therapists, physiotherapists and equipment vendors are all great resources to assess your needs and make recommendations.
They are very knowledgeable about funding options and ways to make assistive device and mobility equipment accessible.
Your local health authority, the Ontario March of Dimes and the Red Cross may be able to offer further support and guidance.
Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.]]>Ask Elizabeth: What Is Palliative Care?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.29174982013-03-21T12:26:53-04:002013-05-21T05:12:01-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Family caregivers may hear that someone will be receiving palliative care, and think that it's only for end of life. The truth is that palliative care can improve quality of life at any stage of illness, and in some cases, even extend it.
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth, a home health care company, has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Megan asks: My grandmother has terminal cancer and her doctor has told us that there are no further medical treatments that can be done for her. He says she will be receiving "palliative care." What does this mean?
Caring for someone toward the end of their life will bring on a huge range of emotions. It is likely something you and your family members are unprepared for as caregivers.
It's important to know that shifting our perspective through palliative care -- which in the simplest terms, means changing the focus from cure to comfort -- can be a great, huge relief.
Palliative care is a type of care for people and families who are dealing with the last chapter of living, at any age. The focus is on providing excellent physical, emotional, spiritual and informational support to patients and their families.
You may also hear palliative care sometimes referred to as hospice care or end-of-life care. This does not mean that there is no more treatment, nor is palliative care only for the elderly or people with a specific illness. I think those myths can leave families under-served, because palliative care addresses the "whole picture" and helps families make informed, tailored decisions about care.
Palliative care professionals include nurses (including home care or community nurses), family doctors and/or specialist physicians, social workers, spiritual care providers, occupational therapists, physiotherapists and personal support workers. They will provide compassion, companionship and care to your grandmother and your family. Care may include:
managing pain and other symptoms such as loss of appetite, shortness of breath and fatigue
nutritional support and personal care (for example, bathing)
emotional, spiritual and cultural support for your grandmother, you and your family
bereavement support
Sometimes family and friends provide palliative care, with no outside help. However, in my experience as a nurse, it is wise to seek help as this type of care is very difficult to do alone. There are professional and volunteer agencies in the community that can help.
Your family members may wish to join an online community to talk and find support when you need someone to lean on, such as Canadian Virtual Hospice.
Although this is a very difficult time for your family, palliative care can make a real difference in re-focusing care and compassion as your grandmother's cancer advances. It may help to also recall these words from Ida Azhari: "Never get tired of doing the little things for others. For sometimes those little things occupy the biggest part of their hearts."
Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: How to Manage Multiple Medicationstag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.28524802013-03-12T08:27:20-04:002013-05-12T05:12:01-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Coming home from the hospital following an illness or surgery can be overwhelming in an already stressful time and it's important to have a plan based on your needs. Who will help you recuperate at home? Is there anyone who can help you understand how to manage new medications?
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Chad asks: My wife was recently discharged from the hospital and she is now on many medications. This is very new to me and I find all this medication confusing and overwhelming. What should I do?
Managing multiple medications is tricky, whether you have had a hospital stay or are living with a chronic health condition. With all the different instructions and potential side effects it's hard to know if the medications you take on a daily basis are working as well as they should.
As a community nurse, I have been the first health care professional to visit many patients after being discharged from the hospital, and I know how confusing and overwhelming it can be to get home and open that bag of new medications.
Meeting with your pharmacist, who is THE medication expert, is a great way to alleviate your concerns and make sure your wife is taking medications safely. Your local pharmacist is an integral member of your community health care team and can support you and your wife with managing this new experience.
I recommend you schedule a consultation with your local pharmacist to discuss the recent change in your wife's health and the new medications she is on. This will help you understand what they have been prescribed for and discuss any possible side effects.
It's a good idea to write down any specific questions and bring a current list of all medications and dosages. Things to prepare for meeting with your pharmacist:
Tell the pharmacist that you are a caregiver and get permission from your wife to receive information about her prescriptions.
Write down any specific questions you have before you meet.
Bring a current list of all medications and dosages, including any over-the-counter medications like acetaminophen, vitamins, supplements and topical creams. List any side effects or reactions.
Make sure you receive, understand, and can read the written information about the medications.
Review each new medication with your pharmacist. Make sure you understand what they have been prescribed for and discuss any possible side effects.
Tell your pharmacist about any allergies or reactions to medications your wife has or has had in the past.
In Ontario, MedsCheck is a program that allows you to book an annual 20-30 minute meeting with your community pharmacist to ensure that you are safely and appropriately using all types of medication. And it's free!
Consulting with your pharmacist should help clear up any confusion you are having. I also suggest you always use the same pharmacist, which will help him or her get to know you and your needs.
Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.]]>Ask Elizabeth: Why You Should Step Up Foot Care with Diabetestag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.27658842013-02-27T17:33:50-05:002013-04-29T05:12:01-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/Over three million Canadians have diabetes and this number is expected to reach 3.7 million by 2020. Caregivers of people with diabetes, especially seniors, need to learn all they can about stepping up foot care -- from maintenance, to shoe selection. Going without proper foot care can be dangerous. Our Ask Elizabeth* advice column has some tips that may be helpful.
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Kerry asks: My grandmother lives with me and she has diabetes. Her doctor told me that she needs to take better care of her feet. How should I be helping her?
Stepping up proper foot care is critical for a person with diabetes. Your help will play a big role in preventing unwanted complications associated with your grandmother's diabetes, like circulatory problems, infections or foot ulcers. As always, prevention is the best medicine. Here are some things you can do to help:
Inspect her feet thoroughly for any cuts, cracks, or sores and report any of these changes to her doctor.
Her feet should be washed daily and dried well, especially between her toes.
Ensure she is wearing the right shoes. Shoe irritation can cause a wound or ulcer, which can be dangerous for a person with diabetes. Look for signs of redness or blisters that may indicate a shoe concern.
As a general rule, people with diabetes should not soak their feet. Soaking can increase the risk of infection, overly dry skin or burn injuries for people who have decreased sensation in their feet caused by their diabetes.
Her toenails and calluses should be cared for regularly by a health care professional.
You can find health care professionals in almost every community who specialize in foot care:
Chiropodists and podiatrists specialize in treating foot diseases, disorders and dysfunctions
Diabetes educators provide education on living with diabetes, including foot care
Doctors assist in diabetes management and some have specialized training in foot care
Nurses often have specialized training in foot care
Orthotists and prosthetists specialize in orthotic and prosthetic devices
Pedorthists specialize in orthotics, footwear and footwear modifications
The Canadian Diabetes Association offers educational workshops on many topics, including foot care, that your family may find very helpful.
Remember, you can prevent most complications associated with diabetes. Learning how to properly care for your grandmother's feet has long term value for her overall health.
Send your caregiving question to askelizabeth@saintelizabeth.com. Answers may appear in an upcoming weekly column. Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: Talking About Signs of Dementia With Your Aging Parenttag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.27270452013-02-21T17:31:15-05:002013-04-23T05:12:01-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/It's not easy talking to a loved one you suspect has dementia. There can be moments of frustration, anger and fear. How do you communicate with them, and also discuss a diagnosis, when emotions are running high and there is confusion on many levels. Our Ask Elizabeth* advice column has some suggestions.
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Bill asks: My dad is becoming increasingly forgetful and confused. He often calls me several times a day and forgets why he is calling. I tried talking to him about my concerns but he became quite agitated. I am really frustrated and don't know what to do?
Watching the symptoms of dementia or Alzheimer's disease affect a loved one is a painful and frightening experience. Speaking to his doctor and getting an early diagnosis is essential. In my experience, there are also some first steps you can take to manage the situation.
Communication skills can make all the difference. Your dad's memory and behaviour are changing but his feelings are intact. Consider your dad is actually trying to say "I don't mean to frustrate you. I know you get impatient and tired of telling me things three times in a row. Please be patient."
Stay focused on his abilities, be patient and give him extra time to process your conversations. Try to have these conversations face-to-face and when you both have the time to really be present and patient. This should help create a sense of partnership with your dad.
Your local Alzheimer's Society has more information and support to help you cope with the challenges you are facing. They can provide you with:
• Educational resources to help you learn more about the symptoms your dad is displaying;
• Referrals to medical professionals to advise you on diagnosis and health management;
• One-on-one and group support to help you cope with the emotional impact of the disease.
Tips to help start talking about the future with someone who may have dementia or Alzheimer's disease:
Be aware of your non-verbal communication. Maintain a calm tone of voice. Many times a senior does not know what is happening, and your reaction may escalate the situation.
Listen and communicate patiently. Listen more than you talk and ask open ended questions.
Gently and slowly start talking openly about the person's symptoms, diagnosis and the future. Focus on his abilities and keep him a part of the decision-making process.
Allow extra time for your dad to process conversations and information. You may need to come back to a conversation several times and break things down into smaller pieces.
You both need to feel supported during this time. Remember that you are not alone and there is guidance is out there.
Ask Elizabeth does not offer legal guidance, nor does it answer questions about personal health issues.
]]>Ask Elizabeth: Taking Care of a Loved One Starts With Taking Care of Yourselftag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2013:/theblog//3.26728302013-02-13T07:52:50-05:002013-04-15T05:12:01-04:00Natalie Strouthhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/natalie-strouth/A tide is rising, and you may be unaware. One out of five Canadians is providing care to a family member or friend. This number is rapidly climbing as the number of seniors who need help at home is due to double over the next 30 years. Most Canadians will experience being caregivers at some point in their lifetime. Are you ready for the job?
Natalie Strouth is a nurse with Saint Elizabeth and the information specialist behind Ask Elizabeth, a free caregiver support service. Saint Elizabeth has been a trusted name in Canadian health care for more than a century and is a national, not-for-profit, charitable organization.
In her weekly column, Natalie answers your questions about caring for a family member or friend who needs extra support -- and caring for yourself as a caregiver.
Jane asks: I am taking care of my mom who recently had back surgery and lives on her own. She needs help with small things around the house. I wish I could be there for her, but I work full-time and have three small children. I feel guilty not spending more time with my mom. What can I do?
What you are feeling is very understandable! Being a caregiver can be very rewarding and deepen relationships, and it can even be filled with unexpected moments of laughter. Yet it can also be very demanding. Remember that it is not only okay to ask for support, it's necessary. Caregiving is not often something one person can do on their own, and asking for help is a sign of strength.
I believe that guilt comes from unrealistic expectations of what we are capable of doing, as well as what we think we "should" be doing. Be realistic about what you can do for your mother. From my experience working with many families and caregivers -- the key to caring for a loved one is knowing your own limits and working within them and then having the strength and courage to ask for help with the rest.
Consider creating a checklist of things your mom needs help with, and who you could ask to help with these responsibilities -- other family members, friends and neighbours can help you form a caregiving team. Online networks like Tyze are a great way to organize help and foster a sense of community and sharing around your mom's needs.
I also encourage you to consider joining a local caregiver support group. It can be a great place to express your feelings, find reassurance that your emotions are normal and expected, and learn new tips and strategies from other people who have been there.
To find a support group in your community try contacting:
• Your local health authority (e.g. CCAC in Ontario or Home Care in Nova Scotia)
• Your family health team
• A local advocacy organization (e.g. Alzheimer's Society, Cancer Society)
• A caregiver support organization (e.g. Family Caregivers Network Society, Victoria, B.C.)
• A local seniors centre
• Friends, family, co-workers or neighbours who are or have been caregivers
Also consider online, group and one-on-one support. And where it's available, Call-211 provides information and referral to community and social services.