2013-05-26T05:22:25-04:00 Selena Cameron http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/author/index.php?author=selena-cameron Copyright 2008, HuffingtonPost.com, Inc. HuffingtonPost Blogger Feed for Selena Cameron Good old fashioned elbow grease. tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.2088333 2012-11-08T12:21:04-05:00 2013-01-08T05:12:01-05:00

Selena Cameron http://www.huffingtonpost.com/selena-cameron/
And, as a Canadian, I've been cheering for RIM for ages. Even in the face of its issues, I have unwavering faith that RIM will pull through. After all, who can imagine a world without BlackBerry? Certainly not me.

But, something happened last week that stopped me in my tracks.

The firm that my husband works for issued a surprising edict: as of mid-2013, everyone at the company will be force-migrated to Android, Windows or iPhone devices. Everyone. After I got over my initial horror, it got me thinking.

Just as the explosive rise of QWERTY phones changed our lives, so could their fall. And, a world without them might not be as dire as I first thought.

Emails "sent by iPhone" or Android devices have one thing in common: they're short. Very short. With few exceptions. No one bangs out an epic email after work on a touch screen device because it's painful to type. And, those same messages are painful to read, often full of spelling errors or nonsensical auto-corrected text. As a result, after hours emails from colleagues with touch screen phones are almost always short and less frequent.

Is it too much to dream that the rise of touch screen phones might just stop me and my colleagues from catching up on work via epic emails sent at night or on the weekend from our respective couches? After all, it's one thing to catch up on "work" email from your phone while you're already on Facebook, Twitter and the like, it's a whole other exercise to power up a laptop to type a "proper" email.

That work-from-anywhere ability that QWERTY phones first enabled seems to have created a culture of responding, even when a response isn't warranted. I wonder if the race to respond first will slow down as Android and iPhone devices continue to gather momentum. Or, if it won't slow down, perhaps at least the messages will be shorter and I'll save time in having to respond.

Fewer QWERTY phones might just mean that I'll start to get my evenings back. Or, at the very least, that I'll stop interrupting others'.

Now, what will I do with all of that extra time?




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Selena Cameron http://www.huffingtonpost.com/selena-cameron/
Maybe I'm generalizing, but the images that are conjured up by the mention of PPD are generally of mothers recovering from childbirth, struggling to bond with their newborns and experiencing feelings of extreme sadness. Using my focus group of one, that's exactly what I thought of when someone brought up PPD. That is, until I went through it myself.

I was diagnosed with PPD almost two years ago. The difference? My diagnosis came when my son was 11 months old (and my twin boys were 4), and three weeks after I started a new, full-time job.

Do the math: I suffered for eleven months before I was diagnosed. More than 330 days. In hindsight, I wonder if my difficulty in making sense of what was happening had something to do with those false images that I had of what PPD was and what it meant.

I feel like I need to put my experience into context for those who struggle to understand its reality. At the worst points (and there were many), I thought about killing myself every single day. I planned my funeral in detail. I cut off complete contact with everyone who was close to me. I was unable to contain severe overreactions to insignificant events. I was so far in that I truly couldn't see a way out.

I made the decision to go back to work on my own in the tenth month of this cycle. In hindsight, it seems crazy -- at a time when everything was going so wrong and I was letting so many people down, why did it seem like a good idea to add another set of expectations to my plate?

Strangely, going back to work is a huge part of what pulled me through.

Somehow, I could hold it together extremely well in front of my colleagues. My achievements at the office, however small, and the feelings of adding value that came with my work, gave me a sense of confidence. Being surrounded by people who didn't know "that" side of my life freed me from the constant questions at home. Yes, there were still many times when I was in pieces, but I was finally in a place that showed me just how wrong everything before it had been, and it motivated me to ask for -- and find -- help.

Nothing I've read says that this is the right path for everyone. Choosing to start a new job while battling undiagnosed depression and managing a family of three boys under five years of age sounds wrong, even to me. But I firmly believe that work saved me, my family, my marriage and, in some ways, my life.

When I realized I needed help, I scoured the Internet looking for examples that mirrored my experience. Trawling through countless discussion boards, blog posts and very official medical sites, I couldn't find anything that spoke to my situation. "Baby blues" didn't reflect my reality. My baby wasn't even a baby anymore, he was walking. I couldn't find myself in the countless stories online of women at home in pajamas, struggling to get out of bed.

So perhaps someone will read this and see themselves. Perhaps someone will read this and see someone close to them. Or perhaps it will just help to change someone's view of postpartum depression. To understand just how difficult it is to pinpoint, to survive and to recover from.

Postpartum depression is a serious disorder that clearly doesn't happen because of circumstances. But, strangely enough, changing my circumstances helped to stop it from ravaging my family.

I feel thankful every day for that.

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.]]> tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.1753017 2012-08-09T08:06:29-04:00 2012-10-09T05:12:04-04:00

Selena Cameron http://www.huffingtonpost.com/selena-cameron/ recent article about women supporting other women at work, it got me thinking: Do companies who value their female workforce appreciate that those who are also mothers need special support? Are there other employers in Canada like Hill+Knowlton Strategies (H+K) -- where I've worked for 12 years -- who value their working-mom employees enough to design benefits just for them? And what are they doing to help them succeed?

All too often, I think we get caught up in details of success that don't actually mean much to moms. I care far less about having a smartphone than I do about the option of using that smartphone to work from home when one of my kids is sick. It's an extra step, but an important one.

When I joined the firm in 2000, I was childless. I didn't join the company for maternity leave benefits or a flexible schedule. I was a consultant, keen to work hard, learn and grow. At that time, being nurtured as a woman employee meant something entirely different; I was eager to work in other cities and H+K helped me tick that box by hiring me in its London, UK office. That experience kept me interested and loyal.

Fast forward a few years, a few promotions and a few kids. As the vice-president of corporate development for our Canadian offices, and the mother of three boys under six years of age, the support I now need to feel nurtured and engaged at work has done a 180.

To be able to properly focus on my work, I need to know that I've put my kids first -- ensuring their needs are met, ensuring they're getting enough of me. I need to know that if one of my sons needs me in an instant, I can go to him -- and do it without feeling guilty. I need to know that I'll be pushed out the office door to make it on time to doctor's appointments and school meetings.

Yes, they're little things. But maybe to moms, that's what counts the most. It's all of these things added together that keep working moms working. Passionately. Sanely.

Work is fulfilling for women, and it satisfies something important inside of us. But once you become a parent, you realize that for it to remain fulfilling there has to be a balance. I can't be fully present in a meeting, for example, if I'm worried that I rushed off too quickly that morning when I dropped my kids off at school because I was afraid that I'd get looked at sideways if I didn't walk through the door by 9 a.m.

Engagement, you see, is as much about the work itself as it is about the environment in which I do the work.

What I think working moms truly appreciate is flexibility without trade-offs. Whether that's telecommuting, a reduced work week, flex hours to accommodate carpools, or a designated work-from-home day, it seems to me that employers who offer these benefits to working moms will find themselves with highly motivated employees who are extremely productive. Because they know how good they have it. Because they're excited to contribute. Because they want to succeed.]]>