Entries by Donald D'Haene from 08/2012

Suck it Up And Visit Your Aging Relatives

| Posted 08.03.2012 | Canada Living

I can't tell you how many times I have heard people say of their loved ones or acquaintances in nursing homes, "I want to remember her the way she was." I understand the sentiment but it's a cop out.

My Relationship with an HIV-Positive Man Taught Me About True Love

| Posted 08.06.2012 | Canada Living

What relationship comes with a lifetime guarantee? So back in 1990, I was a man on a mission. I answered an ad from someone HIV-positive in Toronto looking for a serious relationship. Even today, people still have a reaction when you tell them you've dated an HIV-positive person. My friends were supportive of this relationship but my mother for years worried about my contacting HIV. Robert passed away a decade ago. Our relationship opened up a space in my heart that wasn't there before. Risking that initial date with fear taught me existence without love is as a lifeless as a corpse.

I am (a Gay) Canadian

| Posted 08.11.2012 | Canada Living

My name is Donald. I am a gay Canadian. But I can talk about subjects that aren't "gay" and for the most part I do. Don't assume all homosexuals are alike or like the same things. And just because you know a homosexual or two doesn't mean you "know" us or me.

An Informal History of the Word "Slut"

| Posted 08.16.2012 | Canada Living

Even though the euphemism "four-letter word" only came into use during the first half of the twentieth century, I think the first and most controversial anachronistic example must be "slut. I found an unusual modern-day definition: a woman with the morals of a man. Surprised? Slut is not just a term used for women.

Canadians are Excited to Vote... in the U.S. Election

| Posted 08.20.2012 | Canada Politics

A poll by the Canadian polling company Environic and co-sponsored by the CBC found 15 per cent of Canadians would have given up their ballot in Canada's '08 federal election to vote in the U.S. election. I get it. I'm so uninspired by our Canadian political leaders it's not even funny.

As a Rape Survivor, You Get Used to Stupid Remarks Like Akin's

| Posted 08.21.2012 | Canada Politics

Todd Akin's ridiculous declaration on the serious crime of rape has created a justifiable uproar. Rape victims everywhere have experienced similar insensitive, nonsensical remarks. Count on it. But no one can top the comments of the man who sexually assaulted me for a period of 11 years.

I'm a Feminist Because My Mother Was Abused

| Posted 08.28.2012 | Canada Living

My mother's life is why I am the feminist I am. From the moment I saw her crying, holding her just-hit face, looking into my four-year-old eyes in helplessness, I knew she was something and I would dedicate my life to making her believe it. I once spoke at an event in which I touched on my mother's story. Imagine my surprise when I was later informed, by a woman no less, that one man in the audience didn't like my saying that I was a feminist and said that those he was with felt the same way. She hoped it would be food for thought for me.