I've got a pretty face and a pretty extensive urban spoon wish list. We all know that getting what you want in life can be tough. Which is why I've decided the let someone else finance my dreams. My dream? To eat in pretty restaurants without costing me a penny. You had me at elk tartare, lost me at chin strap. Follow me to learn who I screw over, bang and love as I navigate Toronto diners, drive-ins and dives.
As far as this "social experiment" (as it has been recently deemed) goes, I think some of you are already eating your entree whereas I've only just delved into my appetizer. My rationale? I want to go to nice restaurants and have guys pay for it while I review the food. I will review the restaurant and the date after the fact.
"Is she just looking for boyfriends?" Whoosh. I'm sorry but this blog has gone over your head. I suggest you take that chin strap back to the 'burbs and order some quesadillas from your neighbourhood Kelsey's stat.
If you so choose to dizzy yourself with my logic..."What is she satirizing?", "Whose blog is this an extension of or in response to?", "Is she going to tell the guys at the end of the dinner date that this whole thing is a shameless pursuit of entertainment, fine wines, and the best desserts?" My advice would be: don't be such a university student about this. Let's give it some time before we get all psychoanalysis Freudian Oedipus-complex shame-based egocentric feminist on this one.
Lastly, these guys should feel honoured by this open invitation to date me.
"The world needs more Traditional British Pubs." I couldn't disagree with you more. If you are looking for some hearty scotch eggs and a ploughman's lunch in fiddler's courtyard then please look further. There are no fucking Firkins on this hit list. McLobster? Hell yes. And by hell yes, I mean a big no.
Would I like to Jack it up? Absolutely not. The Old Spaghetti Factory? Kill me. Or rather suffocate me with that awful complimentary bread they bring you. And YES I have been to Salad King, now can we please move on to bigger and better things?
Surf & turf at Harbour 60 and restaurants with absolutely no signage is what I'm talking about. A little back alley tapas, a plate of carpaccio, and some caviar in the back of a joint that doubles as a barber shop. I'm saying yes to the charcuterie plate and no to the garlic bread.
The Hit list
Banh mi boys
Electric Mud BBQ
The Black Hoof
The Rude Boy
Hawthorne Food & Drink
Parts & Labour
If you don't see it on the list its because I've already been there.
Read more at Erin's website, Restaurant Tips From a Serial Dater.
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Follow Erin Wotherspoon on Twitter: www.twitter.com/SerialdaterErin