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Jowita Bydlowska

Writer

I'm the author of the bestselling memoir, Drunk Mom (Doubleday Canada, HarperCollins Australia, Penguin USA). Out in the U.S. on May 27, 2014.
Nico De Pasquale Photography via Getty Images

How Writing About Being a 'Drunk Mom' Changed My Career

I drank while taking care of an infant. I was full of fire, ready to tell my story. The book got published; it became a bestseller; I received lots of praise, but also lots of criticism and even the occasional death threat. One of the most challenging and interesting gigs that Drunk Mom brought on was ghostwriting somebody else's memoir. We recognized each other beyond our differences. We were both addicts.
10/02/2015 12:34 EDT
Facebook

Rapunzel, Rapunzel, Get Out of Your Damn Tower And Get me a Beer

While I was on a date, I noticed that at a table near mine was occupied by a wonderful woman and...Brad Pitt. Or at least it had to be Brad Pitt, otherwise, why would she put up with such a booming voice that wouldn't let her get a word in edgewise? But this is what dating is like nowadays; men getting laid because they're men.
08/03/2012 12:11 EDT
YouTube.com

The Deadly Cost of Bullying

Confession: I was an A-hole kid. I gave into the monkey mentality and harassed another person who everyone decided was a loser -- even our teacher. Consequences were only mentioned in passing after that kid killed himself. Watch the Karen Huff Klein video with your kids. Show them what bullying looks like. Teach them.
06/22/2012 11:21 EDT
alamy

Paper-Pushing Toddlers

Have you noticed how much kids enjoy the mundane aspects of life that we grownups hate so much? Pushing buttons, inserting coins, handing over tickets? I wish that there was some way I could channel my toddler's obsession with the establishment and make both of us happy.
04/23/2012 03:29 EDT

Postpartum Depression: Let Them Catch You Before You Fall

I'm OK! HAPPY! I'm higher than god. In fact, I am god. A human came out of my body. How would I ever feel bad? The problems began a month or so into being a mom. It wasn't anything specific -- it never is -- but I was starting to get that antsy feeling that I was doing this whole thing badly.
01/24/2012 12:12 EST
AP

Is There a God? Always Question

Grown-ups usually have their minds made up about religion one way or another, so either you're (pun intended) preaching to the converted, or talking to an unholy wall. I'm curious as to what will happen when it (religion, god) will be brought up by a child, my child specifically.
12/22/2011 10:36 EST
alamy

Hey, Postpartum Brain, Shut Up!

You may very well be aware of your postpartum depression and feel guilty about it, but you can't see the way to get out. And the deeper you get into it, the harder it gets to maintain the happy face. And if you're similar to me, you end up doing harmful things to change the way you feel.
12/13/2011 11:17 EST
AP

Reading Is Hard! (In Defence of Real Books)

There's a video going around of a baby who's using the hand gestures you'd use on an iPad when leafing through a magazine. This video kind of pissed me off. The baby doesn't understand how pages work because her parents have never showed her a book before.
11/09/2011 01:01 EST
alamy

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Motherhood

I kind of thought that giving birth would automatically turn me into a bouncing, bib-juggling, broccoli-mushing machine who felt self-fulfilled because of motherhood. But it didn't. Having a baby was equivallent to a mini nuclear bomb going off in my mentality.
11/02/2011 09:25 EDT
Bravo TV

From a Child Prostitute to a Housewife: Yay Women.

I can think of four reality TV shows that have stupid females in common. All four are about females dressing up and and having fights. I can't think of one example in any of these shows where somebody visits a library or a museum or applies to school somewhere.
09/12/2011 09:23 EDT

Naked and Free on a Nude Beach

At the nude beach, I wanted to see wrinkles and sagging bits, hair tangling where you never see it tangling in modern porn. I never stared, but I'd glance discreetly and register. My looking was always connected to the process of affirming that I, too, was human.
09/08/2011 09:32 EDT

I Cheated on You... Will You Marry Me?

I believe in love. And I also believe in men having fire lit up under their butts after dalliances, suddenly panicking and making the gravest of life decisions to save the said butts.
09/02/2011 07:52 EDT

Solidarity -- From Lech to Jack

My support of the NDP reflects my sentiment for what I grew up with: a pro-democratic movement that began in 1980 and managed to topple communism in 1989. I come from the country that had its own Jack, complete with defiant moustache and charisma.
08/29/2011 12:48 EDT
Jours Après Lunes

Little Girls Wearing Bras

Mommy has a frilly tank top that shows off her chest, so why shouldn't her daughter have one produced by a company named Jours Après Lunes (or should it be "the morning after"?). The little girl will put on a string bikini not understanding at all what the string is meant to suggest, not understanding that it's a signifier.
08/20/2011 10:36 EDT
Thinkstock

A Failed Woman Out of the Kitchen: Why I Don't Cook

I'm not a bad cook or anything, I'm just not a cook. I don't make pies, cupcakes, pickles, jams, banana bread or even cookies from a mix. If you make me a pie, I will not make you one in return and we will never, ever exchange recipes for anything.
08/17/2011 02:16 EDT

Kate Middleton and I Would Probably Rather Be Sad Than Fat

The lives of thin women revolve around denial, restrictions, guilt, and depression over failing... I know because I'd been hiding my own fat monster and had to appease it with Prozac and talk therapy. Still, I suppose, I'd rather be sad than fat. And so would Kate Middleton, probably. And so would you.
08/15/2011 04:17 EDT

Relax!

In my childhood, my mother would barge into my room early in the morning, her shrill voice like a bucket of ice water over my head. Sometimes, when I would complain, my mother would bellow, "Relax!" I used to be upset, but now I know that she was just training me to deal with the world in which she grew up.
08/04/2011 12:34 EDT