profile image

Kathy Kaufield

Writer, Communications Consultant, Mother

Kathy Kaufield is a writer, communications consultant and mother of two young girls. She’s a former political reporter, columnist and news editor who now writes about the ups and downs of parenting instead of politics. She’s discovered her guilt-easing mantra “Well, at least I don’t smoke crack” makes her feel better about a multitude of parental transgressions. You can read her regular parenting column at www.welcometobrunch.com. Follow her on Twitter @kaufield.
BananaStock via Getty Images

Advice From A Breast Cancer Survivor: Check Your Breasts

My soapy hand grazed over the underside of my left breast and there it was. The dreaded lump. And it was big -- just a wee bit smaller than a golf ball. How the hell did I not notice that before? I poked and prodded at it as if that would make it go away. I swallowed my panic. It can't be cancer, I told myself. It's just a cyst. It's fine. I just had a clear mammogram four months earlier for God's sake.
09/28/2016 04:49 EDT
shutterstock

Breast Cancer Epiphany: 'She Did Not Lose The Battle'

Damn right she did not lose her battle with cancer. I immediately felt a... shared dislike for the language of cancer that labels those who survive as "winning" their battle while those who die as having "lost their fight". What, those who die just didn't try hard enough? Never.
02/08/2016 04:10 EST
Kathy Kaufield

How I Learned to Love Clutter

When my daughters were younger and we lived in a smaller house, I dreamed of having a playroom in the basement so I could shut the door, ignore the mess and minimize the noise. When we moved to a new house, I was ecstatic when we dumped the toys in the playroom. Problem was, our girls did not want to play downstairs.
05/14/2015 06:03 EDT
shutterstock

What Is Okay for Your Tween to Read?

My daughter is a voracious reader and has a fantastic English teacher who is keeping her engaged with reading and writing this year. I don't want to discourage her from reading, but I also don't want her reading books that are too adult.
05/01/2015 12:26 EDT
doll

A One-Armed Doll Taught My Daughter About Love

It's been two years since my daughter cut off the arm of her doll, Brianne. That doll will forever remind me of my daughter's loving heart, her compassion, and her innate ability to know her own mind in the face those who would make a different choice. I hope she never loses those qualities.
04/17/2015 05:45 EDT
AP

The Best Tool This Mom Has in Her Arsenal? Post-it Notes

My life as a working mother is dependent on Post-it notes. Put chicken in Crock-Pot. Pick up after band 4:30. Fill in hot lunch order. These bright sticky notes are literally strewn all over my desk. I shudder to think what would happen to our life without them.
03/20/2015 06:04 EDT

The Depressing Realization that I've Lost My Cool

Being "cool" won't make me a better parent, but at the same time, I don't want to completely lose touch with pop culture, fashion trends or most importantly, social media and technology. If I want to stay connected to my daughters as they grow up, I must ensure I stay connected to the music, movies, television shows and books they are interested in too.
03/06/2015 05:20 EST
chris carroll via Getty Images

The Most Heartbreaking Question My Daughter Ever Asked Me

No question from my oldest daughter has torn more at my heart. A discussion about never taking rides with strangers unexpectedly morphed into a talk about sexual assault. "Mom," she whispered tentatively. "Do you mean that someone can just sneak up and do THAT to me?" My heart lurched into my throat. Until that moment, my bright-eyed daughter lived blissfully unaware of the fact that women can be raped. I was rendered momentarily speechless.
01/22/2015 12:59 EST
Getty Images

You'll Never Regret Trying to Conquer a Fear

I hesitated when 4th Quispamsis Guide leader Heidi Quinn asked me if I would help with the group this year. Girl Guide leader? Ha! I hate camping. I don't do crafts. I can't sew more than a button and badly at that. What could I possibly contribute? This was definitely out of my comfort zone. Guide meetings are now a highlight of my week.
01/10/2015 11:41 EST
Matt Carr via Getty Images

True Stories of Tired Parent Style Fails

I made this dreadful realization after a meeting with a new client: half my face was covered with sparkles from my daughter's fairy princess costume and I had forgotten to brush my teeth. Yep, welcome to the world of personal hygiene and style for parents. So, for all you parents who are trying to look halfway decent during this crazy harried pre-Christmas month, this list is for you.
12/11/2014 01:09 EST

Secrets For a Less Stressful Holiday Season

1995 was easily my worst Christmas. I was in my mid-20s, unemployed, living with my mom and in debt after quitting my job to backpack around Europe. On Christmas Eve that year -- exactly one month to...
11/27/2014 12:01 EST

The Torture of Leftover Halloween Candy

I had this thought as I secretly stuffed a third mini-Mars bar into my mouth: my daughters are going to smell chocolate on my breath. I better rinse my mouth. That thought was followed by this more st...
11/13/2014 03:05 EST
Getty Images

Why Do Moms Feel So Guilty When Dads Do More Around the House?

Out of the blue, my daughter said: "Daddy, when I get up in the morning, you are always there. When I am hungry, it's you who puts food on the table. When I need someone to play with, you always play with me. Thank you, Daddy." This story should have made me feel utterly happy, but instead I felt like I was simultaneously kicked in the stomach and stabbed in the heart.
10/30/2014 12:54 EDT
rubberball via Getty Images

One Night Inside a Mom's Brain

Did I take the meat out for supper tomorrow night? Uh, wait, we have no meat for supper tomorrow night. Great. Just great. And skating goes until 6. That's a problem. OK, you can't fix that now, so just go to sleep. I am sooo tired.
10/16/2014 05:17 EDT
Taylor Hinton via Getty Images

How To Get Your Kids To Eat Their Veggies

I don't have time to hide veggies in everything I cook, and I can make only so many muffins. I continue to offer her veggies often, but I'm battle weary, folks. Ready to admit defeat. Then I imagine her little body deficient in countless vitamins and minerals, and I strategize my battle plans for the week ahead.
10/02/2014 05:57 EDT

The Angst of Parenting a Child with Severe Food Allergies

I just sat in the car and had a good cry. I was in the parking lot of my 11-year-old daughter's school on her first day of middle school, but I wasn't having the "oh my child is growing up" type of cry. Instead, I was unexpectedly engulfed in fear about her life threatening allergies to peanuts and shellfish.
09/19/2014 08:24 EDT
Getty Images

My Wish For My Daughter as She Begins Middle School

Memories are tumbling through my head as my oldest daughter starts middle school this week. I'm trying not to let my past demons get the best of me, but I'm worried. I don't want her to lose herself, to lose her confidence, to dim her own light like I did. Here are my wishes for you, my daughter, as you enter this new phase of your life.
09/03/2014 12:23 EDT