Marcia Sirota is an author, speaker, coach and psychiatrist. She's the founder of the Ruthless Compassion Institute, whose mandate is to help people have better relationships, be happier and create good habits.
If you've grown up with parents who overprotected you, did too much for you, and made you feel like everything was coming to you, you're going to be at an even greater disadvantage than the average graduate in today's marketplace. These helicopter parents love their kids but they're doing them a terrible disservice, as their kids are coming out of college and university lacking the basic skills and mindset that will set them up for success.
If parents and schools make it too easy for young people to shirk their work, it's unlikely that these youth will ever be willing or able to do what's necessary, in order to excel in their training or in their future jobs. If a young person has had helicopter parenting and/or has graduated from a college that coddled them, how can they overcome these disadvantages and achieve success in the workplace? It's simple, if not easy. They have to learn the attitudes and skills that will make it possible for them to succeed.
Helicopter parents think that they're doing what's best for their kids but actually, they're hurting their kids' chances at success. In particular, they're ruining their kids' chances of landing a job and keeping it.
In working with people for over 25 years, I've identified five styles of human interaction. What do I mean by five styles of interaction? I'm describing the ways that people relate to one-another based on what's driving them internally and how much awareness they're bringing to their relationships.
It seems that people have become more and more alienated lately. More often than not, our mode of interaction is transactional, as opposed to empathetic. "Empathetic" and "transactional" are two of the ways that people behave with one-another, and they're quite the opposite.
Parents do their kids no favours when they're in denial of their child's capacity for behaving badly. Parents need to stop idealizing their children. They need to see that even their precious darlings are capable of behaving badly, and that it's their job to guide these children onto the right path in life. If parents remain this state of denial, their children are deprived of of this guidance.
Sex is great, being sexy is great, looking sexy is great. Double standards, not so much. I don't see why a young actress in a magazine article describing her talent and her latest projects must be photographed in her underwear, when a young man in the same situation is photographed in jeans and a shirt.
Parents need to take advantage of every opportunity to redirect their teens' energies toward more constructive and fulfilling activities, or risk raising a generation of irresponsible, entitled youth with barely any coping skills to bring to their adult lives.
With Family Day fresh in my mind, I've been thinking about the way some teenagers are growing up these days. I see these kids all over. They're angry and frustrated, miserable and lost, and it's mainly the fault of their parents who've been letting them down.
I recently wrote a post about who marries an extreme narcissist. Now, I'm going to talk about what happens to the children of extreme narcissists. In my practice as a psychiatrist, I've encountered many such children and they've all been adversely affected by having one or both parents with this personality type.
Recently, it was Family Day, and I got to thinking about all the different types of families there are: single-parent families, blended families, LGBTQ families, mixed-race families, multi-faith famil...
What all these people share is the fact that their actions are driven by a powerful need within them. And interestingly, although the choices they make in trying to satisfy this need might be very different, each one of them has the exact same need.
The powerful extreme narcissist will never stop trying to silence those who question or oppose them but when we unite, we become equally powerful, if not more so. When we stand together and stand up up for what's right, we become empowered to create positive change in our own lives and in the world.
It's 2017 and extreme narcissists are among us. These toxic individuals are a real problem, as they're destructive and often dangerous. When an extreme narcissist holds a position of power, say, as the head of a corporation or a country, we're in a mess of trouble.
She inspired Americans to be more caring and respectful toward one-another, as she never treated anyone with less than the utmost respect. For that reason, she won the love, respect and admiration of her fellow Americans. Many First Ladies are respected and admired, it's true, but few were as deeply loved as Mrs. Obama has been.
Using people or things isn't a valid solution to our feelings of loneliness, emptiness and alienation. Consuming things -- or other people -- has never made anyone happy. That's why someone who uses other people or things in order to fill the void is compelled to keep on being a user. It never feels like enough.
This time of year, we're told to be more loving. We're encouraged to get into the "holiday spirit." We're supposed to be more giving, more understanding. But what if we don't feel particularly connected to other people? It's hard to be loving when you don't feel much love.
We see how women aren't taken seriously by almost anyone when they speak up about their experiences of sexual abuse, assault or harassment. As a result, we grow up not trusting that in matters of sexual abuse, assault or harassment, we'll be taken seriously or accorded our proper rights.
Even though the workplace is not the same as the home, and even though the people at work aren't our family, when we're grouped together day after day with the same individuals, we human beings naturally have family-type reactions to one-another. In other words, interpersonal dynamics at work will often mirror familial ones.