Three months ago we welcomed a baby boy into this world. Our second child, Apollo, is a great kid, a delight to have around, a big smiler and destined to be a charming man. A Scorpio, born the year of the Dragon, his ferocity will be benevolent as he grins his way through life, cheeks high and ear-to-ear. How could it not be love?
As these past few month have whizzed by, I have observed a fictitious cloud looming over me -- call it my own version of postpartum depression. I feel that as a blogger I'm obligated to tap into these days of infancy, that I should be mommy-blogging to the extreme, documenting the experience for all to share. Where is this pressure coming from? Is the Internet itself responsible, the Culture of Me leaning down hard on my psyche?
I usually shake it off, realizing the notion as one of absolute ridiculousness: there is never any pressure than that which you place on yourself. But as my Facebook feed fills with pictures of babies in their best outfits, Instagram'd playdates and ironic vacation snaps, I wonder if this pressure I feel is just the reality of what readers want?
Do I share diaper-changing tips, breastfeeding woes and mommy-body workout suggestions? Does having a baby or two grant me this authority? And more importantly: who cares?
As a new mother, whether it is the first or fifth time around, there are inevitable moments self-concsiousness. In Ye Olden Days, one would have asked their own mothers, aunts or grandmothers for advice. Then we hired mid-wives and doulas to hold our hands. Now we have the Internet, where we can troll through the specific and personal experiences of perfect strangers against whom we compare our own situations.
We have become a global village, and even the most reclusive of women (*ahem*) need some sort of female support network. In our celebrity obsessed world it's often difficult to see that nobody has things sorted out, that nobody's life -- or child, for that matter -- is perfect. When the confidence can't be found within, social networking and the intmate details shared by mommy bloggers of the world can go a long way to fighting the oft-inevitable isolated feelings experienced by many new moms.
So to mothers everywhere, bloggers or not, thank you.
Follow Natalia Yanchak on Twitter: www.twitter.com/nataliayanchak