THE BLOG

Ready For Love? Here's How To Find It

10/24/2013 05:29 EDT | Updated 01/23/2014 06:58 EST

We all say we want more love in our lives, but are we actually ready to receive it? People often say what comes into our lives is a direct result of what we're thinking about. So if we spend our time being sad and thinking about how lonesome we are, we will continue to be sad and lonesome. But if we shift our perspective and instead think about finding love -- not our lack of it -- then the universe might just respond accordingly. I believe positive thinking attracts positive outcomes; though I know it's not always easy training your brain to stop dwelling on negativity. But I think if you're serious about finding your match, and you're ready for it, you could just make your wish a reality.

Be the kind of person you'd want to meet. I really do believe if you want to find love you have to love yourself first. It's important to take care of yourself and put in the effort to be your best. Get out there, do good deeds, learn things, try new foods or join a class. Remember to have fun and live joyfully because you'll become the kind of person you would want to spend time with.

Visualize the person you want to be your "one." What do they look like? What do they like to do? Where do they live? How does it feel when they look at you? See this person as clearly as you can, and meditate on that image. Can you picture them beside you on Sunday mornings reading the paper over coffee? Do you feel them beside you walking through the park on a summer afternoon? Can you even smell the fire you're both cozying up in front of on a snowy winter night? What are the core qualities you're looking for in a partner? If you're unsure, you could start with your deal-breakers and go from there. Use your imagination to its fullest when you're picturing them; and once you have your dream partner in mind, hold onto them. Albert Einstein once said, "Imagination...is a preview of life's coming attractions." So true!

Write it down. There is something very powerful in asking the universe for what you want. The clearer your request, the easier it is for the universe to respond. Writing things down is an important step in getting what you're looking for. Try making a list of the person you visualized, but once you've made it, put it away or even throw it out. The act of writing sent your wish out there; you don't need to keep coming back to it.

You need to have faith. I do believe we ultimately have control over our happiness, but I also think the universe lends a helping hand more often than you think! Have faith in the workings of the world, believe that the universe wants you to be happy. Some people call this synchronicity. Have you ever wished you could learn a new language and then one day saw a sign for tutorials in your neighbourhood? Or numbers, seeing the same combination of numbers over and over again...11:11, 9:11, 7:11 etc...I believe these are your guides helping you...directing you to where you are supposed to be. There are signs all around us if you stop and look for them.

Don't judge a book by its cover. Although it is important to be specific about what you're looking for, it's important not to get hung up on things you've always expected or a person you've always assumed was your "type." Be open to meeting new people because you never know! Opposites sometimes attract. And if you've always gone after the "tall, dark and handsome" type but that never worked out...maybe it's a sign you should give a chance to that cute slightly goofy blond you've only considered as a friend? I know many women who are hopelessly in love with great men who don't fall into their stereotypical 'type' category -- and they're so happy! Imagine if they didn't give those guys a chance because they didn't fit into the mould of what they thought was perfect. You never know...dating outside your type could lead to a relationship!

But in the end, don't settle for anything less than butterflies. What matters in a partner isn't how they look; it's how they make you feel. Don't get me wrong you need to be attracted to your partner...and "feel" the attraction -- so their outer facade does matter to a certain extent. There's a great quote in Sons of Anarchy that I love: "We don't know who we are until we're connected to someone else...we just know we're better human beings when we're with the one we're supposed to be with." If you compromise on love, you may never get to experience the pure joy of it. And when your partner looks into your eyes and your heart skips and you have butterflies in your stomach, that's one of the best feelings in the world! I believe we all deserve to find that kind of love -- the key is being open to receive it.

xo Natasha

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