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"Home Alone" for the Holidays? Embrace it!

Once December rolls around, it can seem like everyone is divided into couples and singles. It can be pretty overwhelming when you're single and not coupled up, it can be too easy to let yourself feel lonesome or down in the holiday dumps. But you do have a choice about how you feel you can choose to be happy.
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Once December rolls around, it can seem like everyone is divided into couples and singles; it's almost worse than Valentine's Day because it lasts all month! You'll hear couples talk about the gifts they're buying one another, or the dinners they're hosting, or the holiday parties they're attending. Many couples get engaged or married this season too. It can be pretty overwhelming when you're single and not coupled up, it can be too easy to let yourself feel lonesome or down in the holiday dumps.

But you do have a choice about how you feel; you can choose to be happy. You have the power to decide whether you will be happy or sad about any given situation. Here are five ways you can choose to be happy if you find yourself alone over the holidays.

Donate your time to a worthy cause. I know I say this a lot, but it's because generosity and charity are so important to me. Nothing pulls you out of what can be a 'self-absorbed' slump than donating your time to those in need. Yes, it can be lonesome to be single for the holidays; I'm sure we've all been there at least once! But don't forget that you still have so much value and worth to share with the world. Especially during this season, anything you can do to help out will be greatly appreciated. And the feeling of joy you'll get from giving back is incomparable.

Get out there! I know it takes a lot of energy not to sit home when you're feeling lonesome or blue, but it really does pay off to get out of the house. It's a lot easier to feel down about being alone when you're sitting on the couch in your PJ's. And even though indulging in a cheeky candy or two and Love, Actually works wonders (it's one of my favourite holiday movies!), there's a whole world out there full of inspiring and interesting things to see and do. Whether you're donating your time at your chosen charity, or heading over to a museum or gallery...the point is, staying home can often lead to feeling sorry for yourself, something that really limits your potential.

I'm not saying we should ignore our feelings of loneliness altogether; sometimes they are what spur you to find your own romance -- or find ways to fill your life with hobbies and activities. There's also great singles meet-up groups in many cities across Canada and the U.S. that go beyond the usual drinks-at-a-bar routine and take advantage of the winter; you can go snowshoeing or skiing, skating or even do the Polar Bear dip! :)

Say yes to holiday party invites. I know it can be hard to attend holiday parties when you don't have a date and it feels like you're the only single person in the room, but remember that your friends and family invited you for a reason: they want you there. These festive events are really special to the people throwing them, and if you drop by -- even for one rum & eggnog -- it will show you care. Celebrations like holiday parties help make the most of the season, and can turn life's everyday moments into lifelong memories.

Parties can also be a great way to meet new people, and you never know -- you may just stumble upon a holiday romance of your own! Plus, when you're off to a special event, you'll also take the time to put in a little extra effort...doing your hair or changing out of those PJ's. I'm a big believer that looking good helps you feel better! There's a great quote from Coco Chanel that goes: "I don't understand how a woman can leave the house without fixing herself up a little, if only out of politeness. And then, you never know, maybe that's the day she has a date with destiny. And it's best to be as pretty as possible for destiny!"

Treat yourself. One of the positives about being single for the holidays is the money you'll save not having to buy your partner a gift...so why not spend (all or some of) that money on yourself! Book a spa day, get a new dress and heels, buy yourself a beautiful piece of jewelery. You'll probably want to say yes to more of those holiday parties after a day of spoiling yourself. Plus, pampering yourself can be a great stress reducer and it's important to treat ourselves from time to time.

Take a stroll over to Holt Renfrew, or pick up a Starbucks and check out the beautiful lights (and great shops) in your neighbourhood. A lot of Canadians and Americans are doing their holiday shopping online these days, so why not order yourself a treat from Net-a-Porter or shopbop.com! Or, for the budget-conscious, even a relaxing bubble bath or spa day at home can be enough to lift your mood.

Be grateful. Above all, don't focus on what you lack during this holiday season; instead be grateful for what you have. Start a gratitude journal. Pick out a beautiful new notebook (it can be a treat in itself!), and write what you're grateful for first thing in the morning; it's a great way to change your perspective before you start the day. Journaling can help your mood at any time, but it's especially beneficial in December with the feeling of new beginnings around the corner. Write down what you want for the year to come, and don't forget to include ways to nurture the love you already have in your life. When you train your mind to focus on the positives instead of the negatives, you'll start to attract more positives into your life. It's what the phenom book The Secret is all about, and it works! Don't believe me? Who would you rather ask out -- the guy with the frown or the guy with the smile? :)

In the end, remember that being alone for the holidays doesn't mean you have to feel lonely; you can always choose to be happy. Closing yourself off from the world is only going to limit your opportunities and possibilities, so get out there! If you approach the holidays with an open heart, you'll make the most of the season, feeling love (and loved) in your own special way.

Happy Holidays!!! xo Natasha

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