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Ever been on the receiving end of an angry tirade that turned threatening? That's exactly what happened to me Saturday on the golf course. I was on a mini vacation with my mom, and we were golfing on...
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It's very easy to judge another. Everyone does it. On Friday, we went to grab a bite at Wendy's. Ahead of us, there was an impatient woman, waiting to be served while a confused, older gentleman was...
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There is no hair of the dog for the morning after. There is no specialized rehab. Copious amounts of water to hydrate your burned-out system are of little avail. As with any good recovery effort, you need to acknowledge that you have a problem. Yep, this is your problem.
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My thoughts were always about how I couldn't do it anymore, how I sucked at being a parent or how my children hated me. "Can't," "won't" and "don't" were all constants in my vocabulary. I woke up and realized I didn't like who I had become or the road I was going down. But most importantly, I forgave myself.
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Rather than focusing on your anger, focus on hearing what the other person is saying. Don't listen to what they are saying -- hearing and listening are two totally different things. Hear past the person's words, and try to understand what they are trying to tell you.
Shouldn't I be happy? I have three healthy children, I have a wonderful husband, I have supportive friends and family, I have a roof over my head and a vehicle to drive, yet I'm so full of anger, so much anger. Every night I am mad at myself for yelling at my children, for losing my cool for reasons that don't warrant such anger.
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News headlines about sexual assault are too common, but stories of survivors and their realities are not commonly spoken. As part of Social Justice Week at Ryerson University, sexual assault survivors have shared their emotions in Lost Words, art workshops led by Toronto illustrator Hana Shafi.
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That men have higher rates of addiction than women do is not surprising, as men's social and emotional experience is rooted in what could be regarded as an abusive system which gives men only one emotional outlet (anger) and social expectations to uphold a masculine tradition that serves only the antiquated system that created it.
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"No one ever changed anything in the world without experiencing some level of anger."
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It is hard enough to stay calm, cool and collected when being criticized, but when it happens in front of our colleagues, and when we are "sure" it's groundless, we absolutely have to contain our baser instincts. We may not want to draw attention to ourselves, or worse, we want to avoid throwing gas on the fire.
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Wouldn't it be great if when people were wrong, they could just 'fess up, apologize and take different actions to move forward? Just imagine the increased opportunities of positive and productive workplaces. Call me a dreamer! Unfortunately, egos get in the way and fear stops us from acting on our healthier options.
They are just thoughts, no big deal, people often say when they find themselves engaging in bouts of anger, hatred, or cynicism. What we don't ask enough, however, is what all that negativity does to our health and well-being, not only psychologically but also physically?
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One time I heard that menopause is the last chance a woman has to straighten out whatever isn't right in her life. It's her last time of insight into the reality that "all is not well in the kingdom." I wonder, dear PMS, if you aren't a microcosm of that concept. My anger may actually be an insight into truth.
You do have a choice. You may have to take a financial hit to put yourself in a better long-term situation. This happens to people all the time and resilience comes from taking action with a longer more practical viewpoint.
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When you teach your child "calm breathing," you are using a technique that works to slow down his/her breathing, combating upset, stressed and anxious feelings. Teaching a child to use calm breathing to regulate their emotions is important because it shows them how to change their breathing to minimize the effects of their emotions.
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I have no patience. I'm snippy, rude and have a short fuse. I think my kids' behaviour is atrocious. Is this because I am newly widowed and stressed out or am I just another mom dealing with kids? I don't know the line between what is normal and what is a result of our grief? I am confused, frustrated and feel like a failure as a parent.
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For the survivors left behind, suicide is unbelievable and surreal. It is a game changer. Your life is permanently altered. It is the day time stands still. It is the day you stop taking a full breath. It is, alas, the day people can avoid you, talk about you and even blame you.
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You've had an argument and it got completely out of hand. It escalated into something personal, and then something hurtful. It's a good way to ruin relationships, and all the hurtful things that were said can be very hard to recover from. Force yourself to stay as calm as possible. Don't take any bait to react negatively, or explosively.
Alzheimer's caregivers are amazingly successful at juggling all of the things necessary to meet the needs of their loved one, but each day they're simultaneously learning how to juggle the many emotions they experience. Anger, guilt, fear and frustration are just a few of the complex emotional balls they are trying so hard to keep in the air.
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I am often asked to comment on the state of things in the world and of the universe. For a long time now I have been experiencing a transitional feeling to the vibrations around us. A major shift in u...
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I won't go into the details of black groups being marginalized at the hands of white people who dominate the "center," because if you're smart enough to think that you fooled us into feeling remorse for "leaving you out" during the protest in Toronto, then you're smart enough to do a Google search to figure out historical black oppression and its endless contemporary reproductions.
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When you're a woman, tone policing is rampant. Amid the hate and abuse, we are expected to stay as calm and eloquent as possible. Our justified rage is always attributed to over-sensitivity, hormones, or PMS-ing. We are treated as emotional, not intellectual beings, when the truth is we are emotional AND intellectual beings. Intellect without emotion is dead inside. There's a whopping double standard regarding tone between men and women (and of course others along the gender binary and non-binary folk). Men who are angry are passionate and driven. Women who are passionate and driven are just angry.
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The more exceptional the individual, the more vulnerable they are to the green-eyed monster. It would be intellectually dishonest to say that I never gossip myself. I succumb to the temptation too. We all do. Because we are human. But I strive to honour the wisdom I have learned from academia and everyday experience about the devastating effects gossip can have.
When we hear the word depression, we often imagine a person who is listless, sad and isolated. Rarely do we think of the angry, depressed person. Anger is a big part of depression. I know because I've been through it.
For some, emotions -- positive or negative -- are not readily expressed, at least not in public. Some may take this as good manners, others as signs of rigidity and unnatural restraint. In any case, researchers warn that perpetual emotional suppression is nothing benign but can lead to potentially serious mental and physical health problems and even premature death.
A few days ago, the well known and respected commentator Rex Murphy presented a blistering critique of atheists, which seems to have been triggered by the recent debate over whether atheists soldiers should have access to their own chaplain. I believe it is worthwhile to highlight another glaring weakness of Mr. Murphy's article -- his misuse of the term anger.
Anger is a daunting emotion, a sentiment that we try to evade or even conceal till our wit allows us to. It's interesting to see how we are repulsed by anger; even an association with it is dreaded. Though it makes me wonder, isn't it just another emotion, a feeling without which we would be incomplete?
A period of major change in one's life often provokes fear or anger, before making way for angst, uncertainty, and melancholy. And then, eventually, a more buoyant feeling of hope, optimism, and happiness. I have playlists of my own to help me through the change cycle -- for each stage.
I am friends with all my exes! Many people find this very strange. Many years ago I had an extremely bad break up, and because there was so much hurt between us we decided to not speak. This was one of the most difficult and challenging times of my life. But as I get older I have little time for bitterness, anger, or hurt. If there is an ex in your life whom you feel anger towards or cannot speak to them, let them go.
When I asked people why things are a mess, no one took responsibility for this crappy society we have created. No one said, "Well, I didn't vote so, X was elected." No one said, "Well, I didn't speak up, so X was bullied." Everyone blamed someone or something else.
A caregiver definitely needs to "get a handle" on his or her day. As the day begins, so it usually unwinds, and tension begets tension. I get a handle on my day by meditating. That ritual precedes the ritual of caregiving. And ritual it must be. I have found that a familiar routine is absolutely essential to a calm day -- meals, bathroom, exercise, naps, bed, at the same time every day. The pace of the day is determined by Alzheimer's.
It seems to me that Alzheimer patients have quite a lot to be angry about. It is tempting to take it personally, to be hurt, to even get angry ourselves. But that accomplishes nothing. We know that, in the end, this is a battle that Alzheimer's will win. But the disease doesn't have to win every round. I try to think of myself and my husband as partners in the fight. If I can calm his anger with a hug or a smile or a word of understanding, we have won at least one round.