Was this the longest week ever or what? Seriously, having to wait a full week after the finale to watch Whitney stumble her way out of Brad's cross-examination was a true test of human perseverance.
The finale had all of the critical elements needed for a successful finale. And dare I say, with the outcome of last night's show, we may have actually successfully achieved the most shocking finale ever in Bachelor History!
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Ah, the 'tell all' episode -- one of the finest displays of fake apologies and insincere compliments, all in front of an estrogen-infused studio audience.
Ah, fantasy dates. Where couples are placed in the most unrealistic, extravagant locales, in order to come down to earth and get the most clarity in these final oh-so-important moments. Go figure.
How are we supposed to suspend our disbelief over the potential success rate and sanctity of these relationships when it is beyond preposterous that hometown dates are taking place on episode five? I mean we already know that ultimately, this relationship will fail. But at least by the end of previous seasons, we had hope.
If ridiculousosity is not a word, well, then, consider it one now. Really, Brad? You're on episode four and already scheduling hometown dates for ne...
Based on the 'Bachelor'-related break-ups lately, I'm thinking there is little to no chance that Brad and his woman of choice will last beyond New Year's Eve. If that. But yet, we watch.
This episode opened not with Brad readying himself to sink his teeth into bachelorhood, but with an uncomfortable abundance of product placement and overt sponsorship .
If you missed the first episode of The Bachelor Canada, then you missed all the boob talk. Boobs, boobs, boobs, boobs, boobs. Why is it that some women are so fascinated with whether or not another woman's breasts are "real" or "fake"? Is a potato stuffed with cheese no longer a potato? I rest my case.
Canada's version of 'The Bachelor' doesn't stray too much from the tried-and-true American formula: we have the same ol' bachelorettes, the same ol' bitchiness and the same ol' cringe-worthy awkwardness. Who were the first ladies to get the boot?
If you watch any of the "Bachelor/ette" shows, I'm not judging you, I swear. I just don't get it. So please, explain it to me. Because right now, it's unfathomable.
When the Canadian version of The Bachelor hits the air this fall and your hairdresser's cousin's co-worker's son's teacher is on the show, will you be watching? I will. And with my team of real and pretend online friends, we'll have plenty to say.