First and foremost answer the question why you want to write your memoir. What is driving your need to write? The memoir you are writing is your story, unique to you. Pack your fear of honesty at the door and answer why this story is important to you. The truth frees you to be who you are honestly -- as a person.
Many people may experience an oft-ignored phenomenon well-known to existing singletons - that single people can be marginalized in 21st-century Canada. Like all forms of social marginalization, it can result from the attitudes of individual people, as well as from government and institutional policies.
I don't want to dwell on the past or on my divorce. I only want to look ahead. I'm grateful that things worked out as they did, even though it's been hard. I hope my kids will be resilient because of this. I hope they will realize how strong they are. How lucky they still are to have two parents who love them very much, even if their parents no longer love one another.
This place, this home, is especially special. It's where my oldest son first crawled. It's where my youngest first hiked a mountain. It's where they learned to swim and catch fly balls. We cry every time we have to leave. Then the countdown to next year's trip begins, first with months, then weeks, days, and now hours.
Retirement years mean different things to different retirees. Some want to spend those years playing miniature golf in Florida, others want to fulfill lifelong dreams. Travel, giving back with their expertise, and becoming involved in their community in a significant way are just some possibilities. Life expectations at this stage can be very different from your partner.
Accepting that the marriage is really over is hard for many divorcing parents. In my case, although I initiated the split, I could only look sideways at myself as a soon-to-be-divorced woman. The pain surrounding that was too overpowering to take in all at once -- I felt it would have squashed me if I tried. So I got to know it gradually, with support, until I could stare it right in the eye.
Blended families are everywhere, representing nearly 13 per cent of all Canadian households. In the U.S. approximately 40 per cent of adults have a close step-relationship, such as with stepchild or stepparent. The process of bringing two families together, or adding a stepparent, can be extremely complex.
The question I've been asked consistently throughout my life is, "which side do you identify more with?" I hate this question. You are forcing me to choose between my Italian culture and my Filipino culture. It feels like you're asking me to decide between pasta and puncit. Between gelato and halo-halo. Between my mom and my dad.
When does a wife become an Alpha Parent? When they become the person who hovers over her husband when he changes the baby's diaper or prepares a meal, just waiting for him to do something wrong -- or rather, something different than she does -- so that she can correct him, criticize him or just take over with an exasperated, "Oh, I'll do it."
Blended families don't feel in unison or in sync right off the bat; it's not something that happens overnight. It takes patience, love, understanding, compromising and time. In our case, it took us a few years before we felt in sync, like a real authentic family. Having a child on the autism spectrum made this journey even more delicate.