Those words secretly worked magic on me. As a disabled person, I had an extra swing in my waist that never bothered me. The joy in my feet was something far more powerful than anyone could understand. The flash in my teeth, were vicious to those that fed me negativity, and the same flash was a brilliant smile that won the hearts of those that I cared about.
The grief is still there. But suddenly, from somewhere, almost eighteen months later, I do now occasionally experience the unadulterated joy that I never thought I would again. To my surprise, I am no longer numb. The flowers in the park, a small child patting my dog, the flight of a bird, planning a visit with my grandson with his friends -- these things bring a lift to my heart.
Growing up in the 50's and 60's, my mother Lillian was primarily a "stay-at-home"mother. It's not that she didn't have high aspirations for her future, as she dreamed of being a dancer. However, times required she go to work directly after graduating high school as a bookkeeper for a dress manufacturer, her professional dancing dreams dashed.
We're tormented by our obsession with weight. Losing weight is hard to do, and the overwhelming majority of us gain back whatever weight we lose (and then some). Every failed weight loss effort drags us deeper into depression. Loving thoughts breed acceptance and patience. Sometimes I stray from my chosen path and eat something that triggers my food addiction. Because I love the body I once had and don't fear returning to it, I'm able to respond to these slips in a healthy way. I accept that I've gone off the path. I forgive myself.
It's been a month since my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and WOW has it been a learning experience! Changing diapers at 3 a.m., figuring out how to sterilize bottles, bathe the little one, strap her into the car seat, and rock her to sleep. One of my personal heroes, Ram Dass, once asked his guru "How can I attain enlightenment?" His guru replied: "Feed people and serve people." OK.
Many times we come into a relationship expecting others to create our happiness, and many times we end up being disappointed. Why? Because it's not someone else's job to make us happy. Happiness begins within. If you want and desire love, you have to begin by first emitting love, and that journey begins within.
You've just woken up from a deep sleep and then remember that you've been romping all night with the Sandman who may also happen to be your Ex. That's when the WTF moment kicks in. Sex dreams happen to everyone. Sometimes they are as pleasurable as riding white horses in the meadow with George Clooney or getting naughty with Mila Kunis' legs wrapped around your waist.
I met Helen Hayes, stayed several times in her house in Cuernavaca and she was kind enough to let me interview her for The Toronto Sun. Her husband had been dead for many years when Helen told me: "I could no more have remarried than I could have been unfaithful." Helen was just one of many public figures who spoke to me about love, marriage and sex.