I recently saw an old friend for what we both knew would probably be the last time. I was a little shell-shocked, and given the awkwardness of the situation, didn't really know what to say. I didn't think I should be flippant, resorting to something day-to-day innocuous like "See ya soon!" or "Take care!"
Sometimes it's important to slow down, take a breath and realize what is actually going on around us. Especially when it comes to relationships, we can lose sight of our love in the day-to-day madness of our career-driven lives. Here are a few simple, quick things you can do to let your girlfriend know you keep her at the top of your list.
Cheating is about one thing, and that's the transgressor's inability or unwillingness to reconcile the feeling of love with the decision to love. Feeling love is easy, because it's a largely chemical affair. But, once we cross that bridge into a serious, committed monogamous relationship, those feelings aren't enough. The decision to love is another matter entirely, and one that many cannot come to terms with.
I wanted to share the words of my dear friend Wes with you: "Marriage is a curious thing, especially a straight-looking marriage like ours. We are not straight, I am not straight. I am a man who was born a woman, and I began my transition to male about four years ago. I'm marrying a woman who was born a woman, in three weeks. It has taken longer than it should to appreciate that the love my partner and I share exists in two worlds. It has taken longer than it should to appreciate that we are more than one thing. More specifically, it has taken me 27 years to figure out just how many things I am."
There is yet another chain message going around the Facebook ranks, this time involving moms. While I understand, and even support, what I feel the author's intended message is, I don't think that a poorly-written and typo-laden chain letter can sum up motherhood. So I'm forced to ask myself -- yet again -- why Facebook is so stupid.
One of my favourite self-help-style books and one that I still think about every day is the The 5 Languages of Love. The book made me reflect on how I express love to those in my life, but also on all the ways people tell me that they love me too. After all, isn't it sad to think that people are telling us they love us in ways we're too "deaf" to hear?!
Relationships are messy, and sometimes love sucks. You won't always be 22 and carefree and riding on a train through Europe, wondering if you should doodle in your journal or take a nap. The movie Before Midnight understands that long-term love never comes easy, and romance isn't always about long walks in a Viennese park.
I am friends with all my exes! Many people find this very strange. Many years ago I had an extremely bad break up, and because there was so much hurt between us we decided to not speak. This was one of the most difficult and challenging times of my life. But as I get older I have little time for bitterness, anger, or hurt. If there is an ex in your life whom you feel anger towards or cannot speak to them, let them go.
What is an ecosexual, you might ask? It's about looking at the Earth not as 'mother', but as 'lover' -- calling to reduce our carbon footprints and revolutionize how we each truly impact our environment. What's a better trend than being eco-friendly and increasing your pleasure capacity at the same time?!
Imagine going to bed with flu-like symptoms and waking up three weeks later with no legs and only one arm. Bryan Cuerrier doesn't have to imagine. He lived it. He was diagnosed with Flesh Eating Disease. But his love and passion for life hasn't changed. To mark the third anniversary of the incident, he and his incredibly devoted wife have signed up for the Toronto Marathon on May 5.
I have to admit, I am a through-and-through romantic and, although my love life has had its ups and downs (whose hasn't!?), I like Valentine's Day. But love isn't an easy concept. For me it's something that has changed as I myself have changed. In each relationship and decade of life, love plays a different role.