Want to really rev up your relationship? Even your life? Step it up for our one-week relationship challenge. We challenge you to embrace your relationship as the most important thing in your life. The most interesting thing is that if you and your partner meet this challenge, you'll find your own needs met in a way that doesn't happen when you're both optimizing for yourselves.
I'm not personally a proponent of cohabitation before marriage. If you asked for my advice, I'd tell you not to. There's plenty of empirical research out there to suggest that it might not be the greatest idea. But you don't need to reduce men to sex-starved lunatics (or women to desperate shells who will whither and die if they don't get a ring) to get your point across.
We put our team therapy approach into action -- three of us working with one client at the same time. Over time we've come to understand why men seem to prefer this team approach to therapy. Not only can we help navigate rough emotional terrain, and get to the root cause, but we can help translate and teach them the emotional language of their spouse.
You need to see that your partner has suffered too, not from your anger, but from the weight of his or her own actions. If you believe your partner deeply regrets his actions, knows he was wrong, and even feels he violated his own personal standards, you will feel more trusting and open to forgiveness.
With our couple, Robyn feels insecure about their connectedness. She wants to feel close. So when he comes home late, she turns that into, "I'm not important. He doesn't care." She feels hurt or abandoned, and that's why she gets upset. On the other hand, Blair needs validation. His sense of identity and confidence are important.
This may be one of the greatest conundrums a couple can face. How to have a stable and secure relationship, and keep the passion alive? How to become a family (with or without children) and yet remain lovers? We have gathered research, clues, and client feedback for some practical ways to stay hot and heavy.
Relationships are messy, and sometimes love sucks. You won't always be 22 and carefree and riding on a train through Europe, wondering if you should doodle in your journal or take a nap. The movie Before Midnight understands that long-term love never comes easy, and romance isn't always about long walks in a Viennese park.
And so it seems the quality of our sex lives hangs in the balance of these ordinary life moments that have little to nothing to do with sex. And just as easily, they can be reconciled and turned around in a matter of seconds. Remember: In these moments it's really up to you and your partner which way you want your relationship to go.
Last Christmas, my best friend's spouse bought her a pair of furry, leopard panties -- size XXL. He's never lived it down. But even that unfortunate purchase is eclipsed by a gift one of my clients received from her mate: a pair of nose-hair clippers, sent, with love, from "The Nose Hair Fairy." For many couples, gift-giving is a minefield of potential conflict.
You'd have thought Maclean's would have blazoned the death of Section 13 all over its front cover. With a massive headline along the lines of "SCREW YOU, CENSORS!!!" Or "WE WON!!!" Instead, the cover featured a generic picture of an innocuous youngish woman and an innocuous youngish man grinning maniacally and the silly headline: "The majority of us are singles. So why do we still live in a couples world?"