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Why isn't that an acceptable way for boys to react toward pressure or other feelings? Why do we tell them to toughen up?
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Extensive rigorous research demonstrates that an emotionally secure child has a healthy understanding of interpersonal skills and improved academic performance. Every parent knows the pain of seeing their child in distress over some emotional hurt. As parents we must accept that we cannot make 'boo boo's go away for their entire life. Let them feel it and learn some agility skills. Dexterity counts in the game of life too.
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You're waiting for your flight to board and you receive an unexpected text that sends you to an emotional tailspin. Lucky for you, if you book it the nearest bathroom and compose yourself before heading up in the air. But what if you find yourself unexpectedly sobbing at the ending of a rom-com mid flight?
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I've seen fathers go from being authentically overjoyed in the presence of their kids to becoming these sad, defeated men who can't even muster a hello, much less a toast at a family function. Worse, I've seen what it does to their kids. Hell, I am one of those kids.
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Our fast-paced lives often require us to make decisions on the fly with little consideration of why we are doing what we do and even less consideration of the long-term impact of those decisions. Clarity acts as a steady light beam that guides us to the right decision -- in our business or personal lives. It helps us identify our goals and precisely when we want to achieve them.
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In a rare occurrence, Christmas Eve and the first day of Hanukkah fall on the same day this year. Perhaps these two religious events coinciding is a signal that the world can be a more united place in 2017.
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Anger or anxiety disables our thinking brain. We need to re-calibrate what we are thinking in order to reclaim our emotional balance. That being said, when someone is putting pressure on us or elevating our blood pressure, stepping back and approaching things differently can help improve the outcome.
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Have you ever had a closet that was full of old clothes and that you lost a lot of weight? If you decided to buy a new wardrobe, you would have to declutter the stuff that doesn't fit anymore. We have to do the same thing with our calendar.
The people who use emotional blackmail are doing so because it works. They rely on our negative emotions where we turn off our logic. People who use emotional blackmail are also adept at punishing you if you try and play their game.
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Oh no. You can hear them coming down the hall and are wishing you could hide under your desk. Being on a team project with them can feel like there's no escaping them. You know who I'm talking about: the nay-sayers and folks who seem to go around thinking there's a contest to be won for complaining or seeing the worst out of every situation.
While research increasingly places feeling valued and getting promoted on the same level as being well paid, we still need to feel we are being fairly paid. I have always felt that compensation is another way of keeping score and of measuring your professional value.
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I've often wondered how high-IQ individuals feel about the increasing importance placed on emotional intelligence (EQ). Over the past three decades, we've witnessed the exponential rise of EQ as a key...
A lack of soft skills will take a toll on the bottom line. Prospects hate to feel like they are merely potential revenue sources for sales people who simply want to "hit their targets". Winning their business should involve much more than a sales call, presentation, or a lunch.
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Lisa called me to get some advice about a colleague named Wendy whom she called a drama queen. (Both names are pseudonyms.) She started pointing out several exchanges and I asked her to just describe...
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Our egos, especially when we are feeling insecure in a new undertaking, can sabotage us. This can be exhausting if we are unaware that we are reacting to fear. Stepping back and taking stock of why we are reacting is a healthy first step. Then we need to implement some leadership habits.
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If you're a caring parent, of course you want the best for your children. You think about their future and want them to be happy, healthy and successful in life. You want them to have good relationships when they grow up; meaningful pastimes and success in whatever job or career they eventually choose. When it comes to their future work life, they'll need important guidance from you, their parents.
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Being talented, driven, confident, curious, creative, courageous and ambitious are all necessities if you want to be a success in any field, but they're not enough. The interpersonal component can make or break even the most promising career. The bottom line is that if you don't know how to relate to other people it will be difficult, if not impossible, to succeed in your career.
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For those climbing the organizational ladder (and others already at the top) the ability to earn the trust and loyalty of colleagues, clients, and prospects through exceptional soft skills now tops the value of technical expertise as the hunt for prospective leaders continues.
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You do have a choice. You may have to take a financial hit to put yourself in a better long-term situation. This happens to people all the time and resilience comes from taking action with a longer more practical viewpoint.
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When improving or correcting money management behaviour in others, we must be sensitive to the personal and emotional definitions of value that are consciously and unconsciously involved. Yet most financial literacy programs avoid this altogether and focus on the more pragmatic and practical skills.
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Counselling should push you and test your limits, and help you understand your strengths and vulnerabilities. It may be uncomfortable and exhausting at times, but in the same way a good work out feels good physically, a good psychological workout can be deeply, emotionally satisfying.
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But, what if you don't have access to cuddling? What if you are one of many who seemingly function in life as touch-deprived individuals? What if you wanted to and could cuddle with someone right now? Well, here's what I've learned you can do about it.
Our personal brand evolves with us. This is why it's important to continually check in and re-evaluate how we define it. For me, I know I need to take stock again when my gut instinct tells me I am growing and changing. Lately, I have found myself feeling a bit antsy, and I thought revisiting my Five I AMs might help reset my priorities.
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Your world is no longer the same. There is no clock, no formula, no standard operating procedure. It takes as long as it takes. Your healing journey is unique to you. In grief, you remember and sift and sort through the good and not-so-good memories, feelings, history and artifacts of a life.
Throughout my career I worked for some pretty awful companies. They were awful mostly because a couple of key people at the top were successful in creating a toxic work culture. Exclusion, discrimination, and bullying were the daily norm.
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If you feel you just don't have that gift of natural connection, don't worry. Great interpersonal skills can be learned. You can become aware of others and engage them more naturally and easily than you think. You first need to get over your belief that you're "just not a people person" and that it's not your responsibility to foster teamwork -- just results.
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I want to work in a world where it's OK to really feel things, to shed a tear, to let it all out, to have a meltdown. Maybe not in the middle of a board meeting, but privately and with someone who feels safe.
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In the 1992 film A League of Their Own, Tom Hanks' character, a coach, responds to a female player who started to cry almost uncontrollably when she couldn't handle the criticism, yelling: "There's No Crying In Baseball!! THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!!!!"
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Making a comeback is about reclaiming your authenticity. It's your chance to shine brighter than you did before, because you are embodying a better version of yourself -- the YOU you were meant to be. Sometimes those qualities get lost, sometimes they get buried and sometimes they just need to mature.
The holidays are filled with social gatherings, family dinners and opportunities to connect and share the joy of the season. But with this festive season also come land mines that are within every family -- all this togetherness can sometimes backfire. So, how do we avoid this meltdown? Here are some tips to assist you in keeping the family peace during the holidays.
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Making mindless decisions with our money may create short term bliss or satisfaction but can have long term impacts on our financial well-being and financial security. When we make mindless decisions with our money, we don't take the time to really understand our thoughts, feelings and actions around our choices.
Learning is not just about retaining knowledge, it's about understanding how to relate that knowledge to other people in a meaningful way. And you can't do that if you are distracted, stressed or lack emotional intelligence.