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You might be a bit of a psychopath.
You dated someone. You broke up. At some point you started sleeping with them again, but you never "got back together." You knew this wasn't a great idea, but you did it anyways. Sound familiar?
It's just so typical. You spend all this time complaining about being single, and then when you find a great new guy you start freaking out! All your old baggage starts reappearing, and you're not quite sure how to deal. Follow these tips, from self-reflection questions to a mock-conversation with your partner, to banish the past where it belongs!
In the weeks after my first real heartbreak, I made an effort to spend time with my ex in a misguided attempt to prove that, despite being brutally dumped, I was still awesome. He couldn't care less; he had already started dating someone else. But being around the source of my rage was eating me alive.
The zen master in me wants to put on a soothing voice and say that everything happens for a reason, that we learn from our pasts, and that pain can be a teacher. But let's talk instead about the ways of doing it with class; ways that make it hurt less and leave the door open to friendship. Maybe not right away, but eventually.
While I have never been married, and certainly hope never to divorce, I have had my share of failed relationships and rejections. As I reflect back on my own past relationships failures, I can honestly say there is no one that I wish I was still with. In fact, I've found myself thanking God that they are out of my life.