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If you look around the Internet you'll find that most advice for the 30-something crowd centres around how to find your future mate. Why nobody is talking about how enjoyable and acceptable it is to be happy, in lieu of a partner, is beyond me. I must have missed the memo when being 30 and single was declared an alternative lifestyle.
Many times we come into a relationship expecting others to create our happiness, and many times we end up being disappointed. Why? Because it's not someone else's job to make us happy. Happiness begins within. If you want and desire love, you have to begin by first emitting love, and that journey begins within.
Sometimes when I sit down with a new client, we review how and with whom they are spending their time. What I often see is that women have a "fill-in" boyfriend in their life, meaning a purely platonic guy-friend that they hang out with, laugh with, do activities with, confide in but are not involved with. I've come to learn that this type of closeness can sometimes get in the way of meeting a boyfriend because you are already getting all your needs met by this guy-friend, except for physical intimacy.