I believe we need to shift in how women -- and society -- classify giving birth. We need to spend more time encouraging women to embrace their unique experiences. We need to concentrate on educating women on what the body actually does as well as different methods of birthing and various outcomes -- without judgment.
It was becoming evident in photos of our baby that his forehead was very round and protruding, and his temples looked "pinched" into his head. He also had a very marked flat spot on the back right side of his long and narrow head shape. I brought up my concerns, and I was told not to worry about it. But I did.
It should have been a moment for my husband and I to celebrate, to hug and kiss over. Unfortunately, it wasn't. Immediately after delivering, I cried out to the nurses about the pain in my stomach. It had gotten much worse. It had become unbearable. That's when I started to fall into a deep, confusing haze.
"How's the baby?" you're asked constantly. "How's she eating/sleeping?" It doesn't take long for you to notice the monumental shift in focus, from you -- the glowing, pregnant woman -- to the baby. That seat that people jumped to offer you on the bus? Taken. It's touching to feel such warmth and interest towards your newborn, don't get me wrong. But how about we save some of that for mom?
Just in case you missed the first trillion times I mentioned it: giving birth was really hard. Now I am about to give birth again. This time, to a book. In some ways, giving birth to a book is harder than giving birth to a baby. Everyone loves your human baby because it's an innocent party in all of this. But many will hate your paper baby, because you made it, and you suck.