We accept life is irreversibly transformed and some parts of our pre-children lives are forever lost. It's hard to do -- life was simple and straightforward before kids and it's healthy to admit we miss it. It doesn't make us ungrateful parents, it makes us human. It means we're honest.
I resent being labeled as being on the "Mommy Track." First, unlike Thomas, I'm not a train, thus not on any track. Second, I've never once heard anyone speak about my husband or any male friend or colleague as being on the "Daddy Track." As soon as my husband inseminated one of my eggs bearing us our first child in 2011, all of my accomplishments and endeavours were overshadowed.
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The point is that working moms need a village to be successful. They need short-cuts and tips that make life easier. With precious little time at home, it's things like swifters and crockpots make a difference. If you don't have a support system that can help you find the things that can help you feel like a better mom, build one. It's worth it.
It's time to put an end to the "having it all" madness. For one, this meaningless term serves only to make the most successful women feel like failures. Rather than stay on track with this meandering debate, we owe it to ourselves, and future generations, to refocus our attentions on real issues: a stubborn wage gap, the under-representation of women in senior roles and covert discrimination in the workplace.
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We are shifting out of the patriarchy. The old model built for men does not work for us women as we read in Anne-Marie Slaughter's piece, "Why Women Still Can't Have it All." I admire Slaughter. Except there is one major difference that allows me to have it all; I am a Social Entrepreneur. I don't take this for granted and invite women to design the world they wish to live in.
Jim Power, school principal of the elite all-male Upper Canada College (UCC), recently wrote that boys need to know they can't have it all either. The fathers Power meets talk about the pressure they're under -- how they badly want to find time to watch their child "master a new acrobatic trick," that they often experience a "tug at their hearts that they keep to themselves." What about the other 99.99 per cent of parenting responsibilities?