When relationships end, it is a sad fact that people take sides, assets are split, and someone, if not both parties, must relocate. The "Geographies of Divorce" is the shifting of boundaries, the renegotiation of territory, the displacement, isolation and the staggering trauma of homelessness that accompanies divorce.
Children may worry they are being disloyal if they start to have too much fun with one parent. They also worry about the parent that they are not with, wondering if that parent is okay. Sometimes they just deeply miss the parent they are not with. The familiar traditions may be gone and this can leave the children feeling as though something or someone is missing.
A CBC investigation yesterday uncovered that 'deadbeat parents' in Canada collectively owe more than $3.7B in support. As a divorce lawyer for 20 years, it struck me that there is a lack of knowledge of how court-ordered support payments work. Here are three things to think about and two actions that you can take which should help Canadians understand spousal and child support a bit better, help you understand why the divorce support payments situation is such a mess, and help explain why it is not even worse.
A word to the wise: one cannot scale the side of a mountain while sobbing uncontrollably. You need your breath for the exertion. You can climb or you can cry. Not both. I soon realized I didn't need to compose myself and carry on. What I needed to do was to stop and let myself have a big fat embarrassing breakdown.
The moment the judge said in the court that my divorce is granted and asked if there was anything else I wanted to add to the list of wishes granted on my behalf, it was a no-brainer -- I wanted my name back. Little did I realize then the implications it would have for days, months, and years to come.