But now the stuff I dream of doing seems to be changing. There's no longer a driving need for me to succeed. I simply hope to experience some offbeat stuff that I think will make my heart happy.
I have been in a perpetual state of anxiety about the future. When I get those jeans, nab that boyfriend, lose those 10 pounds, learn that dance move, I will be happy. I have always had this sinking feeling that I was waiting for something to make my life perfect. But my life IS perfect. I have a life after all, and every single second is beautiful and precious and needs to be acknowledged and given great attention.