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And I’ll scroll Facebook while I’m doing it, too.
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“To stay upset is a choice we make. We often choose to perpetuate our suffering.”
“They don’t ever go away.”
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Yes, Sophie Grégoire Trudeau asked for help. And with that request, a firestorm has ensued that has attacked her station. I don't mean her ambiguously political role as the spouse of Canada's prime minister or her status of privilege. I very much mean her standing as a working mother.
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Who doesn't want to be close to their mother, especially on Mother's Day? But for thousands it's just not possible. Being with Mom hurts too much. Her "love" is toxic. It causes too much emotional pain. No time is this more controversial and guilt-inducing than on Mother's Day.
After six years of writing about hot topics in parenting, I have read many studies, talked to countless experts and quoted hundreds of news stories. During that time, my family has grown a collective six feet, and aged from preschoolers and kids to teens and tweens. And I want to be honest when I tell you that despite the thousands of hours I have spent reading and researching parenting, I still have no idea what the hell I am doing.
Last week in this column, I explained how mom guilt works. It allows us to feel good about ourselves even when we think we are acting improperly. For instance, "I went back to work but I feel gui...
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At some point, many moms will wrap up their maternity leave and return to the work. Whether they have hired a nanny or are facing teary drop-offs at daycare, mommy guilt is sure to set in for many. So...
I don't judge my friends who work full-time (I'm completely proud and impressed by their success) and I don't judge my friends who don't work at all (I'm amazed by their patience and ability to put their careers on hold). The trouble is that moms feel the need to defend their position (myself included) whenever they feel it's being questioned, and sometimes it gets downright vicious. We've already established that there's no "perfect" solution that works for everyone, so it seems wrong that anyone has to compare themselves to anyone else (and feel guilty or insecure), but we're never going to get past it, it seems.
Sometimes I think I must be a really nasty, boring, bee-otch to be around. They're growing up fast, I just want my kids to want to spend time with me. I want them to be excited when they know we have an entire day together. I want them to think I'm the best thing since sliced bread, but I think those times are starting to disappear.