I've always been an advocate for speaking openly about sex and masturbation. I make a point in asking my friends (and mother) who are in long term relationships about their sex lives, partnered or solo. The singles are more likely to offer information, but I'll pester them every once and a while anyways.
Valentine's Day is coming up, and you know what that means. There's no need to be coy about this: If you're planning on getting busy this weekend, why not go the extra mile and bring the right equipment? Investing in a sex toy can make all the difference between a night to remember and an evening you'd rather forget. So here are some highly-recommended suggestions.
There are plenty of articles about sex and aging. For women, the advice seems to boil down to "use lube"; and for men, "consider Viagra." But erectile dysfunction is not inevitable; neither are dryness and vaginal atrophy. Lest one might think distress is lower in this age category because we have given up on sex, some of us who are 65 and older are having regular and satisfying sexual activity with no need for aids of any kind.
Despite what porn and Hollywood lead us to believe, women's erotic networks of nerve endings, erogenous zones, and pleasure options are more complicated than for penises. While erotic hotspots and pleasure techniques in men are generally more universal and consistently popular, the sources of arousal and pleasure in women are more varied from person-to-person.
You've just woken up from a deep sleep and then remember that you've been romping all night with the Sandman who may also happen to be your Ex. That's when the WTF moment kicks in. Sex dreams happen to everyone. Sometimes they are as pleasurable as riding white horses in the meadow with George Clooney or getting naughty with Mila Kunis' legs wrapped around your waist.
A longer lasting solution for pumping up your sexual 'oomph' comes from a different type of sexual variety. By changing the how instead of the who, we can open a world of sexual pleasure for a lifetime. By fighting against your body's natural habit of getting locked in to one method of pleasure, you can train yourself to enjoy a much wider variety of sensations and situations.
By the time this couple came to talk to me, they were in a pretty bad sexual rut. They had been married for 15 years and had two teenage kids. Both were masturbating almost daily, at about the same time in the evening without their partner knowing. To top it off, neither wanted the other to know what they were up to because they were too ashamed of their behavior.
It is my hope that this next generation of women will put a stop to this crazy nonsense of being a "yummy mummy". If and when they do, sex can then become what it was meant to be: a time for emotional connection with your partner. Because right now, sex for the super-busy woman is just one more thing that sits on her to-do list, that makes her feel guilty to boot.
For over a hundred years, sex researchers, feminists and pop culture have been enmeshed in an ongoing debate as to which is superior: the vaginal or clitoral orgasm. Regrettably, their high-brow ponderings have left the average gal in their wake wondering whether her orgasm is either real or even the best one.