When my husband and I moved into a place of our own, we knew that we wanted to share our lives with a furry family member. We decided that adopting a cat would be the best option for us. We adopted our cat, Lily (6 years old), from a humane society in 2009 and she instantly brought great joy to us. As soon as we got the news of a baby entering our lives, we knew we had to start early in teaching Lily that a new family member will be joining us. Here's how we did it.
The emotional distress started to make me feel sick all the time and it came to the point that I just couldn't continue like this anymore. I decided that my first step to healing was to talk to people who have experienced the same type of loss, and by doing this it helped me realize that everything I was feeling was normal.
It's daunting to be responsible for another life. But it's also selfish... to pass on one's DNA. To have someone who looks up to you. To feel the pride and joy that comes with the pain and tears. Some say that parenthood is the most selfless of "loves" one experiences in one's life. In our case, it wasn't selflessness that drove us to the decision. We chose parenthood because we wanted something out of it.
As I was preparing myself for my maternity leave, all I could focus on was bringing this new life into the world. I did not want to think about all the changes that were happening at my workplace and did not want to overthink the changes happening in my workplace. Why would I invest that extra energy elsewhere when I needed it for my baby? Besides I was going on maternity leave so I had to come back, right? Well, not quite.
When a friend says postpartum depression is normal, I get disappointed. When a psychologist says postpartum depression is normal, I get worried. When a New York Times best selling author and former U.S. congressional candidate with hundreds of thousands of followers says that postpartum depression is normal, I get livid.
Preemie babies make feisty kids! They come into this world fighting for every breath. They struggle to survive each day and they work hard at simply growing one gram at a time. By the time my preemie twins could walk and talk they were ready to take on the world and tell everyone who's boss. They're strong willed and have proven that nothing and no one will stop them.
Forget about the uber-cute size 0-3 month onesies with ruffles and madness all over them, folks. Go for the bulk pack of onesies with the snaps at the bottom, or zippered jammies because they take .09 seconds to take off when baby blesses mom and dad with their first blow-out. And if onesies ain't your thang -- check out my other fave ideas!
There may not have been the stress of wondering about first kisses at the end, but I found I had to carefully navigate other potentially sensitive obstacles, like joking about Calliou being sent up to Netflix from the seventh circle of hell. In other words, I learned first play dates didn't differ all that much from first dates.
Typical milestones are not the ones I celebrate with excited texts to my husband and best friends, or give my kids gleeful celebratory hugs over. In my own experience -- and I think that four kids under the age of seven counts as experience -- these are the baby and childhood milestones that are really worth celebrating.