Magical, desirable, but forget about it, it ain't real.
It all comes down to balance. And sometimes a car wash.
The dinner table is a battle zone.
Watch our new video series 'Apparently' for some real talk about life with kids.
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"Apparently the harder I try to run my evenings routinely... the opposite happens."
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September marks the beginning of the new school year and that usually means mayhem after a long, slow summer. Here are some ways to regain a calm house and peace of mind during a time where you need all your wits about you.
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It's a totally different world after the terrible twos.
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Growing up in Toronto, there were many things to do as a family but one of my ultimate favourite places to go to was Centre Island, or more specifically Centreville. I remember loving the ferry ride to get to the island and then spending the day on all the fun rides. Those are the moments that I remember and cherish to this day.
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Because we've all been there.
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The euphoria of falling in love with our new babies is intoxicating. For me it was such a dominant force, that for a while it overshadowed everything else in my life, including my marriage. I took our marriage for granted, assuming it was strong enough to withstand any challenge. And it is incredibly resilient, but when a baby comes along we're tested like never before. Small cracks in a relationship may grow into colossal chasms and threaten the foundation of our precious family units.
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When you truly connect and are present with another human being you create a powerful emotional vulnerability in yourself and others. Disconnection is a self-protective mechanism that is activated when we feel highly vulnerable. This self-protection then leads us to pull back and withdraw.
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One of a child's basic emotional needs is to be treated with respect. It sits at the heart of a strong parent-child connection, which is fundamental to healthy emotional development. We're capable of giving this to our children, but first, we need to recognize disrespectful behaviour and stamp it out before it jeopardizes our most precious relationships.
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I feel that parenting is my responsibility, but I do not feel that my role of mother or wife or daughter is my purpose. I do not feel my role of counsellor or teacher, author or business woman is my purpose. My purpose does not feel as though it can be defined by a role, any role, in my life.
I was just a little girl, but you had a barbed tongue. Oh, you always couched your cruelty in humour. As if comedy was a disinfectant that redeems meanness. Time and again, I asked Mommy, "Please, tell Daddy to stop teasing me. It hurts my feelings." But you wouldn't or couldn't stop.
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As parents, recent stories of children wandering off and tragically encountering a gorilla or an alligator strike fear into our hearts. We've all lost sight of a child for a moment while tending to another or had two toddlers shoot off in separate directions at a theme park. So how can we show our kids the world while keeping them safe?
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The truth behind four common pieces of baby advice.
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Because my baby girl, you come from a proud line of loving, nurturing, loud laughing, often giggling, deeply feeling and wonderful women with curves who have been wounded by other people's aesthetic expectations and cheated by their own understanding of perfection. I want you to see me love myself for all the gorgeous, nurturing mamas that came before me.
"Careful" is a helicopter parent's mantra. These kids have grown up in the shadows of fear, always too afraid to take risks, too cautious to make sound decisions alone and too callous to stand up for themselves as they have never had to. In their childhood their parents made all their decisions and as young adults they have no clue how to fend for themselves.
"Mommy! Daddy! I had a nightmare!" These words can make your heart sink. How does a parent get inside their child's head and "protect" them from the "boogyman?" The answer is, frankly, you can't. But there IS a way to help your child learn how to face their nightmares.
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HINT: It starts with a shift in our attitudes about kids and housework.
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As I was preparing myself for my maternity leave, all I could focus on was bringing this new life into the world. I did not want to think about all the changes that were happening at my workplace and did not want to overthink the changes happening in my workplace. Why would I invest that extra energy elsewhere when I needed it for my baby? Besides I was going on maternity leave so I had to come back, right? Well, not quite.
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Unfortunately there are officially no Canadian NHL teams in the playoffs this season. But that doesn't mean children across Canada didn't have a great time playing our national sport. And hey, there's always next year. Here are six things I learned from being a hockey mom.
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If your parenting needs to evolve, expert Alyson Schafer is here to help.
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Our children need to develop and equip their own tool box -- we cannot do it for them. This is not our job, nor should we be trying to make our children's happiness and success our goals. This generation of parents is much too eager to do their children's work for them, and therein lies the problem.
We have one dad in boy's baseball who, when asked to help out as volunteer umpire, was happily willing to bend the rules in favour of his child's team. What sort of example do you set for your child when he sees his dad make clearly incorrect calls to ensure his team wins?
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We are doing a huge disservice to our kids. We are raising a generation of children who are going to be incapable of succeeding in the modern era. They are being taught to be egocentric and to give up, often before even trying.
If you have a child who is destroying property, physically attacking others or repeatedly berating themselves, take matters seriously.
This news story is a sickening one: Talk of women being allegedly blindsided with punches to the head in the name of foreplay, of them allegedly bashed against cement walls, of courageous women agreeing to press sexual-assault charges only to be ridiculed on the witness stand. What, on earth, do I tell my intelligent and social-justice-minded daughter about this?
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I am judging you if you are barking orders at your partner. That person is not your slave. Their role is to help you, support you and guide you. There was a time, before stress, when you were loving and kind, which is why you are together. Get back to that. Your life will be better.
"When I work with kids, I tell them, 'You are the chef, I am the sous-chef.' They feel good about themselves and they don't want to let you down. Involve them in the whole process. If you let them pick out the ingredients and bring them home from the store, they are going to be more excited to prepare it and eat it."