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I suppose it is a given that we want our little girls to be polite, kind and respectful, but don't we want the same for our sons?
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While I'm happy he'll get to spread his wings, experience independence and have fun with his friends, this is a big deal for me. I'll miss him and I'm afraid I won't know how to let go. I will worry about him constantly. Is he eating well? Is he wearing sunscreen? Is he homesick? Is he crying?
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We can do better for our girls.
Single motherhood is undoubtedly the biggest undertaking I've ever managed. It's the most all-consuming task I've ever attempted. Some days I'm tired. Some days I'm not so happy. But I want to show my sons that certain things are in their control. I want them to go forward and make choices that bring them happiness. I want them to have faith and to be unafraid. This Mother's Day isn't just about me; it's about celebrating one another and our accomplishments as a little team.
I need you to raise boys who know what real women look like. Boys who know that women have body hair and curvy thighs or small breasts. Boys who understand the difference between actual consent and inebriated/coerced consent. Boys who value strength of mind, body and spirit over physical appearance. Boys who look for a partnership, not a hook up.
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My son runs towards me at full-speed and dives into my arms. He buries his head and tucks it in for a full-fledged snuggle. Then he pulls away, looks into my face and says, "Wait -- do you want t...
Are you going to try for that girl? That is usually one of the top three questions I get whenever someone hears that I have two young sons. Don't get me wrong, if one of my two boys had been a girl, I would have been over the moon happy, but am I any less sad that I have two boys? Are you kidding?
With kids growing up surrounded by advertising, movies and TV, toys, books, and clothes that tell them that some things are for girls, and others are for boys, we're already fighting an uphill battle if our goal is to raise girls who know that they can solve tough, real world problems, and boys who are interested in collaboration, not just competition.
Since starting to coach my six-year-old son's soccer team, I've found myself wondering: Am I helping the boys? Or am I saddling them with mommy truisms that have no useful place in the world of male sport, even when the "men" concerned haven't even grown into their kiddie goalie gloves?
My fear is to raise boys who go through life having a sense of entitlement. Who go from living in their mother's home to marrying someone who takes over the mothering role. I want them to be independent beings long before they get married.
I sometimes wonder if I was properly prepared for having five kids, four of whom are little boys. After all, no one handed me the instructions manual that explained what makes boys tick! So, I've decided to write the Cole's Notes version, just for you! Share it if you know someone who also never received the manual!