Danya Sarafina Naqvi
Part of my journey has entailed realizing that mine will not always be right, or kind, or compassionate, or loving.
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No matter how strong your love, if someone is not motivated to help themselves, no matter how much they beg you, you cannot do the work for them.
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The main problem I faced was a distorted belief system. I felt that love came with accomplishments and accolades. I didn't believe that I was good enough to love as is. When love is missing, a lot of negative stuff comes out of the woodwork: anger, resentment, fear, jealousy.
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Standing for hours on end -- as a professional chef, bartender, butcher, home economist or cheese monger -- is hard on the body. Standing, lifting, bending, and twisting for hours on end, often with less-than-ideal posture, frequently results in achy legs and feet, a sore back, and stiff almost arthritic-feeling hands.
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I have told the story of stopping a young man who almost ended his life at a subway station. But my retelling of that story has always been incomplete. The truth is, the day I stopped that man from ending his life was the same day I was planning to end my life in the same way.
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There are too many Christmases where the shine was dulled by illness. Several times, Christmas Day got completely postponed, and everyone stayed home to avoid more cross-contamination! So, what you do to get through the next few weeks if an unplanned bug shows up to mess up your plans?
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I have spent over 14 years hiding this "tiny" part of my life, and it is now, only after writing my memoir, that I've realized that by hiding, I've been chipping away at my heart. I decided that I didn't want to hide anymore. I realized in that moment that I should have SHARED my pain instead of hiding.
During Small Business Week, it seems an appropriate time to praise small businesses across the country and to share lessons learned from a community's experience as we recover from the largest insured disaster in Canadian history.
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The winter semester has just ended, and instead of feeling relaxed and elated, I feel tense, exhausted and utterly tortured. The last few months of university had proven to be extremely challenging for me. I could barely manage to stay afloat. The pressure felt overwhelming, and the cracks in my life were becoming fissures.
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Please, whatever you do, don't be afraid of talking about your symptoms or feelings with friends, family, or peers. This can be a great first step in addressing your own mental health needs and possibly identify any issues that you may be having in your life that may require psychiatric or therapeutic attention... Believe in yourself and your own internal strength.
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Guilt and regret are the ugly Hyde to the Jekyll of sobriety, even years in. With new awareness, we relive past experiences---or in many cases bemoan what might have been. Pain and sorrow previously numbed by a drug or drink of choice is glaringly present, and strikes unpredictably---in the midst of a family gathering; alone, late at night; smack in the middle of an important work presentation, or during a particularly deep yoga class.
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Because we've all been there.
Tania DaSilva of Thrive Therapy @thrive.therapy had the pleasure of sitting down with Benn Young @bennyoungbennyoung in the Queen West area of Toronto. This is where they discussed Benn's journey over...
If you have gone through any form of surgery, have it upcoming or know someone who does getting informed on how to heal and nourish yourself after will be a huge step in helping the recovery process. To allow your body to heal efficiently and quickly you want to make nutrition a priority as I found myself having to do not long ago.
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I had to be in the moment because my brain would not allow me to think ahead. As I was speaking, it terrified me. What if I would forget my next line? But it was a blessing. I was forced to be present, in that moment and think about the emotions in my story.
Being under-recovered is just as bad as being under-trained; being under-recovered leads to exhaustion, lethargy, muscle aches, trigger points, and stiffness, and left long enough it will lead to injury. Recovery allows the body to become stronger, leaner, and generally healthier; it puts that extra little energetic pep in one's step. It is not something "extra" you do when time allows.
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As a recovering alcoholic and drug addict, feelings of remorse exist frequently in the wake of nostalgia. I'm told that, with time, nostalgia and remorse will undergo a kind of mitosis, and begin to occupy different spaces in my consciousness. Until then, they are forced to coexist, making Memory Lane feel more like an unlit back alley.
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I may not be popular for saying this, but guess what -- people relapse; that's a reality on the path to recovery. And if anything, over the years, I've discovered that the more people who know I'm in recovery, the more support I'm exposed to when I might be struggling and prone for a relapse.
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Do you find yourself squeezing in workouts around the rest of your life -- before work, during lunch breaks and in the evening? While your workouts are important, it is also critical to take your recovery seriously -- the little details have a bigger impact on your training quality than you might think.
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There are stories I come across in the news that leave me feeling angry, frustrated and, at times, bewildered. But hearing the news that parole had been granted to Graham James, the disgraced former hockey coach convicted of sexually abusing young boys in his care, left a hollow ache of deep sadness in me.
If, by some miracle, she makes it to age eighteen still sound of mind, it's time to bask in her glory! Sure, throw the big graduation party, but make sure it's all about you, baby!
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Addiction is misunderstood, and it leaves those suffering from the condition stigmatized. Society makes the assumption that an addict has a personal problem, not a medical one.
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I want you to see the 'real' me -- a man who has been running his entire life, a man who has travelled so far, only to come back to himself. My name is Jean-Paul, and I am a survivor of sexual violence, but I am so much more than that. I am a husband. I am a father. I am a writer. I am an elite athlete. I am an advocate for survivors all around the world.
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For anyone who truly feels stuck, who lacks motivation, or who honestly doesn't see a way out, here's an adage to take to heart: "The anticipation of change is worse than actually undergoing change." I should know. I am the poster child for turning around a ravaged life.
Two months ago, I was in a car accident. I was rear-ended at 60kph by a guy driving recklessly behind me. This split-second action threw me into a tailspin of injuries, endless medical appointments and insurance headaches galore.
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You have likely seen coconut water sold in fitness centers and yoga studios where it is heavily advertised as a natural rehydration beverage. This is because the companies that produce commercially available coconut water claim it contains significantly more electrolytes than sports drinks. However, you might be unaware that many of the companies that produce coconut water have exaggerated the health benefits.
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If you had asked me why I was the way that I was, why I cheated, stole, lied and took advantage of people, I would have told you that I had no choice but to behave that way. I had to look out for myself -- no one else was going to.
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So, is there a lesson in PTSD for all of us? Yes, most definitely. If abandoned in fear, past trauma has a way of writing itself into your future like a voracious virus, but if you are willing to face it head on, you may find yourself attuned to the lesson of growth within its whisper.
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It is not a loving act to allow addicts to get away with self-destructive behaviour. If someone in active addiction is consistently being rescued from the potentially negative and harmful consequences of his or her behaviour by his family, friends, teachers, bosses, or colleagues, then why should he ever change anything?
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Within the literature of Alcoholics Anonymous, the word "recovered" comes up at lot, and come to think of it, why wouldn't it? Many an addict latches on to that idea as a desperate lifeline of hope. I, on the other hand, have grown to embrace the fact that until the day I die, I will be a recovering alcoholic. I long ago decided to make peace with this disease, but that in no way makes me immune to feeling frustrated and angry by the circumstances surrounding my relationship with the addiction.
Given that May is National Physiotherapy Month I wanted to share three separate, yet connected, topics about physiotherapy to help you understand the incredible benefits it can provide, including: how to prevent injury using a technique known as "prehabilitation," and what exactly is physiotherapy.
I celebrated a year of sobriety in February. That first year is selfish in many ways--and necessarily so. After all, without sobriety, I am no good to anyone--to my child, my family, even strangers. In fact, I'm the flat out opposite of good, without sobriety. But now, almost 14 months in, there is space in my life to help others.