As Muslims celebrate the festival of Eid, there are LGBTQ Muslims of various denominations, who may find themselves alone on this holiday. Cut off from their biological families, some find community amongst online friends. Such a community alleviates but does not necessarily resolve all their concerns.
This summer, don't compare yourself to the spray tanned, filtered, posed, air brushed celebrity pics on Instagram and in the media. In fact, don't compare yourself to anyone. Love your body, as it is now. As it looks now. Don't hide behind cover ups and over-sized T-shirts. Be proud of your body. Love your body, as it is now. As it looks now.
By and large, we live in a diet-obsessed society, so my health nuttiness went unnoticed. Plus, like most individuals with eating disorders, I was a master at hiding all this dysfunctional behaviour for many years. I was also incredibly successful at outwardly presenting a well put-together front when facing the world. I had been a model student, a star employee, a good friend and doting auntie to my young nephews. Until it all came crashing down on me.
For most people, fashion is a way of expression; for me it was a support system. When I found myself lost or in transition I simply picked a new character to play and let that character loose in a mall. I would pick bits and pieces of the people around me and tried to imitate their appearance. In true alien mode, I formed myself to look like the inhabitants of whatever place I happened to be occupying at the time.
The true power of the video and the reason why so many people watched it, was the fact that Candace Payne was able to laugh out loud without an ounce of self-consciousness. Ms. Payne was willing to look silly online, and I think that this ability to be so authentic and free was the real reason why her video got over 140 million views.
After a lot of self-work and love, I dropped the crap and chose to love myself, every wrinkle, every imperfection inside and out. This form of self-love is what we could be spreading, as opposed to fear of aging and the fear of ending up alone. We were born alone, and we will die alone, whether or not you have a husband and kids, this is true for all of us.
"Careful" is a helicopter parent's mantra. These kids have grown up in the shadows of fear, always too afraid to take risks, too cautious to make sound decisions alone and too callous to stand up for themselves as they have never had to. In their childhood their parents made all their decisions and as young adults they have no clue how to fend for themselves.
Listening to a friend talk about their divorce, I pause and think -- this all sounds familiar. My friend details the lead up to her separation and there are so many similarities it's a bit unnerving. Same actions, same words, same behaviour. How is that possible? Turns out similarities are not even unusual but predictable, right down to the language a departing spouse might use.
No matter how independent, self-reliant, and strong we are, sometimes there's a part of us that wants to self-destruct. Usually, after a traumatic experience, when we feel especially vulnerable, scared, and alone. And after the devastating breakup with my fiancé and boyfriend/best friend of nine years, I self-destructed in a big way.
I am not asking Mattel to raise my child with a healthy sense of self-esteem and value; it is my job to make sure of those things, and it is Mattel's job to sell toys - and with these dolls, I feel like those goals are aligning more than they ever did before, and I will continue to combat the body-negative messages sent to my daughter, because our daughters should be free to feel amazing about themselves, whether they fit into a mold or not.
By helping their children recognize their inner qualities and focusing on their accomplishments, parents help to teach kids that what is really important about them has nothing to do with their size, shape, or weight. This creates an environment that promotes self-acceptance and positive self-esteem.