We're already into the second month of the year, and there are more than a few of us who'd just love to skip this one out because of two little words:...

Unless we self-reflect and make a change we risk becoming the voice we grew up defying. We might live long enough to see ourselves become the villain. The circle of defiance continues except now our children are the rebels and we are the evil empire.

When I was nine, I had a bad experience while in the hospital with scarlet fever. A nurse restrained me and abruptly poked a needle into my arm, inflicting a pain that felt worse than a bee sting. I avoided having blood taken for the next 20 years, even if it meant risking my health.

Do you find yourself feeling overwhelmed with the many responsibilities in life? There are times you probably feel you can't possibly make it all work, ending each day feeling hopelessly behind schedule and possibly anxious, irritable or depressed. Rather than buckling under the pressure of an impossible to-do list, you should take a moment to view the larger perspective.

So you went from being a slacker with unrealized potential to a mover and shaker in the world in 13 steps. Or more likely, you just read all the blog versions of the whole book (without skipping over too much, I hope) and you are wondering a bunch of questions. I will answer the questions first and then get to the ones who have gone through the 13 steps.

When you are mindful of your daily life, your life is one of being present. Of really living and not just killing time to go virtual. Learning to care and to matter may be one of the greatest commodities in the age of ideas because then your work, play, study and relationship times become chances to experience, feel, think and grow. Live each day like it was the only one you have. Care about people and learn from everything.

The young clients I work with tend to be addicted to: video gaming, magic cards, junk food and/or cannabis. Many would say that their addictions seem to provide a level of comfort -- a buffer from an unsafe world. Having an addictive nature means that you have a passionate nature. So, how do you take these passions and make them become something generative?

So here you are, taking another stab at "making it" in life. Your parents are cautiously optimistic.You are non-committal. Your dog still thinks you're amazing (but he likes Yanni). It should go well. You're older. You've had a few "challenges" under you belt and you've survived. You're not on the street or in a cult or both. Then why so nervous?

In a positive stage of your life, you're meeting with people who will accept you for following your purpose and sharing the qualities of passion and striving that you have in common. Each positive action builds upon itself. Each setback becomes merely a minor bump on the road you are travelling on and everything leads you towards your bliss. You may just find yourself unboxed and free for the very first time!

What would you do? How would you be? How would you go about it? Who would you seek out? What if it wasn't what you thought it would be? How would you know when you'd arrived? Be careful for what you wish for. I am going to give you the keys to make whatever you want happen as long as it is for the benefit of all who are touched by your choices.

Now meet your greatest challenger: the time-stealer. He (or she) is fun, charming, great to be with, someone you are happy to do things with, gets all your jokes, just all around great to kill time with. Yes, the time-stealer is a time-killer. You never get it back, and yet, you value the time spent with them.

If you were to ask a young person in their teens or 20s where they really love being, most would shout out in unison: "I really love my room!" The following exercise is to help create portable "boxes of safety" in the real world.

At some point in our childhood, we have had some negative incidents happen to us that have caused us to be self-limiting. These become tapes playing in our heads so often that we don't even notice what they say anymore but they effect every decision we make. Here is an example of changing the loops:

Success starts with looking at the strengths and challenges in our daily life. Through these challenges, we can understand the patterns that we keep repeating and the self-limiting tapes running in our sub-conscious. Our strengths can inspire us to rise over these repeating patterns and tapes, leading us to a richer life. I invite you to try these exercises for a happier, fulfilling life.

The other day, one of my patients described herself as a "control freak," and an unhappy one at that. Certainly, she's not the first person I've worked with who's been frustrated in their attempts to be "in control," but it always saddens me to see someone wasting her time on something that's neither possible nor necessary.

Letting go of the past is easier said than done. So many of us are hung up on our past -- on the love we felt we had but lost, on past behaviour that has created a certain pattern in our life that is unhealthy or the opportunity that we missed out on. But, we also know it's an unproductive space to dwell in, not only because it leads nowhere, but because it might actually hold you back from a better future. Maybe even from your destiny.

Ever wish you could be a Jane Austen heroine? Do you recognize yourself (or anyone else) in any of these romantic dilemmas? Jane Austen's solutions might work for you! Figure out which heroine provided the romance advice in the mini-quizzes below!