On this superficial scale of chromaticity, P.K. Subban is endowed with the darkest of chocolate hues. None of this should matter in a game of Olympic hockey where the only colour on our minds is gold. And Subban's skin colour should definitely be of no consequence in a multicultural country like Canada. Yet, reaction to the sight of a black man on Team Canada's Sochi roster, as it did at the 2013 World Juniors, revealed that a nation that "doesn't see race" has discarded its rose-coloured glasses.
As of this writing, Canada is 12th, with one gold, five silver and 12 bronze medals. Let us all bow our heads and listen up to what Jerry Seinfeld says: "You win the gold -- you feel good, you win the bronze -- you think, "Well, at least I got something". But when you win that silver it's like, "Congratulations, you almost won. Of all the losers you came in first of that group. You're the number one loser." So at least we have something. A lot of something.
Would the federal government please cut it out with their War of 1812 ads? One minute, I'll be watching some riveting event of sportsmanship at the Olympics, and then suddenly CTV cuts to commercial, and I'm treated to an array of cartoonishly noble characters attired in soldierly red coat and womanly bonnet, circa Regency England, with platoons aiming bayonets at the American frenemy, and I'm like: WTF, federal government?