Dear Vienna Philharmonic Orchestra, I hear that Asians aren't allowed to play in your famed ensemble. We get it. If I bought tickets to see The Harlem Globetrotters, I wouldn't want to see a bunch of red-haired, freckled-faced, white boys. Ain't nobody got time for that! If I go to Hooters, I don't wanna be served by a dude! I mean where would it end?