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If I asked you to close your eyes and imagine a car crash, it might play out like a movie scene in your mind: a car skidding down the road on dark, stormy night or rain pelting the windshield of an out-of-control car surrounded by darkness.
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The main problem I faced was a distorted belief system. I felt that love came with accomplishments and accolades. I didn't believe that I was good enough to love as is. When love is missing, a lot of negative stuff comes out of the woodwork: anger, resentment, fear, jealousy.
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I am looking for a light at the end of the aisle. This light is where consumer racial profiling is no longer part of the daily shopping experiences of many racialized and Indigenous consumers in Ontario. Each CRP story ends with the targeted person describing feeling left stripped of their dignity, humiliated, embarrassed, fearful and vulnerable.
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Resilience has very little to do with surviving, and everything to do with awakening into where you are at this very moment. When we distance ourselves from, or anaesthetize ourselves against trauma and loss, we inadvertently diminish the potential breadth and beauty of our life.
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We often think of resilience as a manifestation of the human spirit's ability to survive the unfathomable -- those grand disasters and tragedies that populate news headlines and our social media feeds. It's as though we don't believe resilience could possible be at play in the midst of our own "mundane" life.
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When I meet people and tell them what I do, they often ask what the most common accidents and injuries are. Those who watch a lot of American TV imagine it might be gunshot wounds. Many people assume, particularly at this festive time of year, that the majority of victims end up in emergency due to alcohol-related car accidents. But even traffic accidents pale in comparison to holiday falls.
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As a therapist, I help people to recognize their patterns of defense, their habitual ways of responding: their default mode. We all developed ways of adapting and protecting ourselves in our early years when our brains and nervous systems were developing. These ways of coping can become hard-wired.
Writing saved my life. Without it, I wouldn't be here. It's really that simple. While that may sound a little somber, stay with me as I elaborate. Last year, I fell into a deep depression. The deepest...
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We as a diaspora, watched the curtain fall on a decades-long conflict we could never fully understand. And although the impact of the war varies drastically between us, what remains consistent is the recognition of a profound loss and the silent mourning of a forgotten identity.
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Teal Swan was only six years old when she found herself in the hands of her abuser and forced into a nightmarish world that a lot of people were unwilling (or unable) to believe. For the better part of 13 years, she was was raped, beaten and psychologically tortured by people who she was told to trust.
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I really didn't understand why I was so sad all of the time. It was a whirlwind of overwhelming emotions of loneliness, frustration and annoyance with everything. It's these times when you need to recognize what's happening with yourself and discover and use the tools to help you get through it.
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A characteristic of resilience is having an ability to make decisions without having all the answers figured out first. I believe this comes from a faith that no matter how something works out, you will either have success or you will learn something important about yourself.
Welcoming refugees into our communities implies a responsibility to provide a safe environment for rehabilitation and integration. Yet this weekend thousands of our neighbours will be exposed to trauma in a spectacle many of us would do away with in the first place. The air show is nothing like a charity bike ride. In a city with a large population of refugee newcomers and people who have experienced the trauma of war it is insulting, invasive, and violent.
I think it's safe to say that as a society, we are rather risk-averse. We are eager to walk a smoother path, and are naturally drawn to life hacks, shortcuts and workarounds. But are we doing ourselves, and more importantly our children, a disservice by sidestepping the lessons of adversity?