As a sex and relationship therapist, I count Valentine's Day -- dedicated to love and lust -- among my favourite holidays. Not everyone agrees. With traditions so rigidly entrenched, it can become the annual romantic Olympics. Anxiety can run high.

It can be especially tough for couples who have moved...

With winter's weather reminding us it is still January even while our memories of eggnog and wrapping paper are rapidly fading, those of us who dutifully write New Year's resolutions are likely sorting them into two categories, self-congratulatory Hey, I'm doing wells and self-critical Whatever was I thinking?s.

Much...

How does a sex therapist work with your medical doctor?

When people encounter a physical problem, they often discuss it first with their family physician. Those doctors often refer to specialists who have focused training and expertise. Sex therapists are one of these specialists.

On the other hand, sometimes...

I recently attended a colleague's seminar concerning professional coaching, in which she skilfully wove together values and goals. She explained that when our values are in conflict with our goals, we procrastinate. This was illustrated by one participant's story of how, though an academic with a Master's degree and several...

It's common for our children to surprise us with how fast they are growing. As a child I always looked forward to the packages that arrived seasonally from my year-older cousins, full of wonderful clothes just ready for me. My mother packed up similar boxes for my younger cousins, greeted...

We've all been depressed. We use the term often and loosely, describing sadness or unrelenting lethargy or any point in between. Many take prescription medications to alleviate the symptoms, while others self-medicate with alcohol, drugs or bad behaviour.

We grudgingly exercise to lift depression's cloud, or we pull up...

Genitals require very little care to function properly throughout a lifetime, but as with anything valuable, they appreciate being looked after. Some basic maintenance helps these organs provide years of pleasure.

In infancy, the foreskin protects the penis from infection and injury. There is no medical or logical reason for...

Remember when you were sixteen and you had just gotten your permit to drive? Remember the thrill, the power, the status of that driver's license? Can you recall the concentration you paid to each minute detail of the driving experience?

Let me compare that to the flush of new romance,...

Try as we might to keep our emotions in check, we invariable get irritated and sometimes succumb to expressions of anger. We display our individuality in our anger styles. We learn these as children, watching our elders deal with difficult situations. We can usually, for instance, recall Mom's and Dad's...

During my years of training, both academic and experiential, I have learned all sorts of methods of softening the messages I delivered to my clients. One of the most effective was reframing, like telling someone they were good at finding methods to meet their needs instead of remarking about all...

We learn early to reserve the use of the best of our things for special occasions, for others. This practice may, however, signal more than meets the eye about how we view ourselves and our world. Let me give you an example.

During the Christmas holidays, I was visiting a...

Let me see if I've got it right. You've been with that bright, independent, good-looking woman for a number of years now. You've learned how to weather the storms and support each other in the important decisions. You are really pretty content but you miss that fiery hot sex you...

Fifty years ago parents wrung their hands wondering what to do with their daughter who was 'going steady' with her high school sweetheart. Back then, parents encouraged their daughters to see many boys, correctly believing that this would provide experience with a wide array of relationship styles, promoting better choices...