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Steph McGrath

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Does This Tweet Make Me Look Fat?

Posted: 05/27/11 09:00 AM ET

Someone I've never met, yet continue to follow, keeps Tweeting about her White Whine anguish in a very bitter way. If Twitter is to be believed, she's really pissed about being single (sweetheart, sarcasm is the garnish on your heartbreak entree) and finds her parents somewhat tiresome. I think she might also have a pony, but that's another story.

One day, after a series of annoying interesting Tweets from this individual, I found myself wondering: "What the hey, does this lady stand around the street corner bemoaning her fate to strangers?"

Probably not and that led me to wonder: "Do people tell the truth more often on Social Media than they do in real life?" And that led me to start snooping on friends' Facebook walls and combing through various Twitter feeds. I also conducted some exhaustive research on the topic by making a trip to the Google machine and typing in "Social Media Truth Telling Research".

The Google machine led me to something called honestly.com -- a "candid community-created reviews of business professionals". (Like LinkedIn without all the resume padding I guess?)

The Google also brought me to an article on socialmediatoday.com titled "Connectivity, Transparency and Truth Telling".

"The mutual interconnectedness of all things is not just an idea anymore, it is becoming a reality.

This means that truth-telling is the easiest option. Since, if everything is connected and transparent, falsity will be uncovered. None of this means that we will necessarily transition towards more democratic forms of political organisation. More likely it will organise around current political infrastructure."

Interesting ....but sort of brainier than what I'm wondering about, which is... just how embarrassingly honest can people be? So I set up a trap, in the form of a Facebook poll that asked my friends which they'd rather be if given the choice: Smart or Pretty/Handsome.

It didn't go very well. First of all, only seven people answered and that's because I forced six of them to and also answered it myself. Five chose "Smart" and only two (one of them was me) picked "Pretty/Handsome". Because I know my friends, I know at least three of the "smart" votes are total lies! So much for honesty on FB.

Deciding not to "insert myself" into the experiment, I moved over to Twitter and simply "observed". This worked better.

@HfxMan recently devoted a considerable amount of characters to telling the world about his adjustment to single life. Here's a snippet: "After being married 4 practically my entire adult life, this being single thing is taking some getting used 2." He goes on, in a series of Tweets, to talk about the difficulties of brunching sans mate. (Dear @HfxMan, I wish you no disrespect, I enjoy your social media ramblings, you just happen to help support my thesis.)

Then there are the types that are overly honest about their lives just by their check-ins. Example? A friend both on social media and off spends way too much time and money at Banana Republic. I know this because he checks into the store on social media every freaking weekend. I wake up on the weekend, I take my dog outside, I check Twitter and -- oops! There he is! Shopping for button-up shirts or something. See? He's being honest about his consumer culture nature and his fondness for an upscale version of The Gap. (Again, no disrespect.)

Others are simply too honest about their desire to be seen as a Social Media Guru (the very phrase makes me ill. Memo to all: no such thing! There are Social Media Strategists and they can help you! But the good ones don't call themselves gurus and do jazz hands while talkin' Twitter). These are the types that post blog links, "helpful hints" and factoids all day long. I'm considering expunging them from my feed. Example: @BrettRelander "5 Easy Ways to Liven Up Your Facebook Stream". Ick, too obvious in your effort to be seen as a Guru @BrettRelander! (I feel another blog post about the most ridiculous Social Media advice ever coming on.)

Then, there are the woe-is-me women, like the stranger on my Twitter feed, who talk endlessly about 1. The cute things their kids say 2. How much they wish they had a boyfriend/husband 3. How mad they are at their boyfriend/husband 4. How they're suffering from a general sense of malaise and discontent (paraphrasing here). 5. How they just ate soooooooo muuuuuuuch and don't care cause because it's so good but are now feeling fat. I vote these the worst set of truth tellers. Please tell me that after 2011 years we have something to talk about other than boys, babies and "does this Tweet make me look fat?". Please.

So why, why are (some of us) unflinchingly honest on Twitter? Maybe it's because we're tired of mundane real-life small talk about the weather, the weekend and how excited you are for Monday to be over? Maybe we want people to hear us complain in the hopes they sympathize and throw a social media pity party to make us feel understood and comforted. Maybe we're just all tired of making things up.

Oh, before I forget, I must give a special shout-out to my favourite social media truth teller -- The unicorns. Seriously people, all social media and the Internet in general would be 100 per cent better with more unicorns. @Unicornomics regularly makes my day with truthful Tweets related to the nature of this magical beast. "You can lead a unicorn to water, but you can't make it drink. Unless you give it a twisty-straw. No unicorn can resist a twisty-straw."

Indeed, there is beauty in truth.

 

Follow Steph McGrath on Twitter: www.twitter.com/somethingwitty

Someone I've never met, yet continue to follow, keeps Tweeting about her White Whine anguish in a very bitter way. If Twitter is to be believed, she's really pissed about being single (sweetheart, sar...
Someone I've never met, yet continue to follow, keeps Tweeting about her White Whine anguish in a very bitter way. If Twitter is to be believed, she's really pissed about being single (sweetheart, sar...
 
 
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Kache
Citizens, Unite!
05:42 PM on 05/30/2011
Sorry Steph. Facebook is the 21st century confessional. You just found out what the priest on the other side has been putting up with for 2011 years. We all thought it was matters that Saint Peter would keep in a database somewhere in the sky. Nope, it's always been about things as mundane as "boys, babies, and fat".
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Steph McGrath
01:46 PM on 05/31/2011
oh well ... maybe tomorrow something interesting will happen?
10:15 PM on 05/29/2011
To answer your question, yes it does.
10:43 AM on 05/29/2011
Where is the story about Anthony Weiner?
lovelybunchofcoconuts
It's nice, to be nice, to the nice
06:02 AM on 05/28/2011
I would like to read a blog post about the most ridiculous Social Media advice ever.
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jeanrenoir
01:59 AM on 05/28/2011
Young people today have taken the Beatles' dream of a life of TOTAL escapism into the yellow submarine of drugs, sex, and fantasy MUCH further down the road to oblivion. It's like Gen Y is standing right on the deck of the Titanic that is their sinking American future, and they are still completely oblivious to the ice berg because they are so lost on their phones. Somehow, I don't think the Asians, both here and in Asia, who are rapidly burying our clueless kids, are quite so obsessively out of tough and determined to not worry and stay "happy" in digital land.
garystartswithg
el sueno de la razon produce republicans
01:52 AM on 05/29/2011
i know a lot of Asians, and most of them aren't the uber-kids you make them out to be -- they like to play video games too.
boomers have burried gen y -- ironically the same thing is going on in japan -- they call their lost generation "grass eaters" becuase they aren't as hungry for raw flesh and success at the cost of everything else as their parents are. when you are told to overproduce for less than living wages at some point you just give up and grow a pot of arugula and decide that is ok too.
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Kache
Citizens, Unite!
05:52 PM on 05/30/2011
"grass eaters". Puts a whole new perspective on Vegan, doesn't it.
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Kache
Citizens, Unite!
05:50 PM on 05/30/2011
LOL! Yeah, boomers thought Brave New World sounded like a cool place and set out to make it come true, and their children were born in the Yellow Submarine and seeing nothing but water forever through the periscope see no reason to come up for air. On the up side, we're becoming more whale-like.....
09:36 PM on 05/27/2011
So anyone who isn't as shallow as you are must be lying?
Your curiosity about social media ramblings has led you to write an incredibly rambling post. And talk about White Whine anguish- do you know what "projection" is? Because you're doing an awful lot of it here.
10:42 PM on 05/27/2011
What is she projecting exactly?
11:43 PM on 05/27/2011
"Someone I've never met, yet continue to follow, keeps Tweeting about her White Whine anguish in a very bitter way."
This entire post is nothing if not "White Whine anguish."
Although for some I'm sure it's heart-wrenching to read about how terribly disappointed she is by her friend's Banana Republic check-ins.
12:46 PM on 05/27/2011
I enjoyed your post! But I think you miss the point of Twitter and even Facebook. It's not about communicating; it's about *feeling heard*. When I tweet I really don't care so much about whether anybody really reads my message. But I feel so much better having expressed myself. It's an ego boost and an emotional outlet.
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jeanrenoir
02:01 AM on 05/28/2011
A nonsensical statement. If it's not about someone actually reading what you wrote, how does that make you "feel HEARD," as opposed to feeling as if you shouted something into the void?
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Kache
Citizens, Unite!
05:58 PM on 05/30/2011
Well..... Screeny doesn't have any Fans yet.

So, Screeny has not yet had that thrill of knowing someone read her/his shouting into the void and LIKED it. Come on jean, let's do it, let's both Fan Screeny and see if she/he goes into a delirious frenzy beyond her wildest dreams.

Fanned Screeny!
11:59 AM on 05/27/2011
Love this, Steph! I think the anonymity of it all allows people to tweet their minds. Sadly, however, social media has allowed bullying because we don't have to face the other person (not even on Facebook) when we tweet or post comments. It is great though not to have to always make small talk to people. Look at all the holiday letters full of made up happiness about our "great" family lives. Let's face it, reality does bite!!
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jeanrenoir
02:03 AM on 05/28/2011
Our kids are just getting stupider and stupider. Read the Emory English prof's excellent book from last year called The DUMBEST Generation. I've been teaching college for forty years, and I can assure you that the kids get stupider every year, stupider in the sense of more empty headed, ignorant, and out of it as far as the realities of the world are concerned. It's incredible how unprepared for adult life most college students are today. There are exceptions, but most are truly immature and clueless. It definitely as NOT always this way.
10:35 AM on 05/28/2011
While young people must proportionally know way more than their forebears, not much has suggested to me that many kids are getting more aware of the world and what's around them, despite the proliferation of media. I do see that students of a higher level of intellect are still aware of and interested in all things. The "dumb" ones, however, seem to use the phone and internet as a means of just tunneling deeper into their own narrow lives.

My concern for years is not just with young people but with the lack of sound reasoning skills among the population of U.S. citizens as a whole. How people like Sarah Palin, or Michelle Bachman could actually have followers is, in my opinion, a resounding testimony to the low level thinking ability of many Amiercans today.
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Steph McGrath
01:44 PM on 05/31/2011
Thanks! Love your comment too
11:43 AM on 05/27/2011
Please tell me that after 2011 years we have something to talk about other than boys, babies and "does this Tweet make me look fat?". Please.

2011 years? Where does that number come from? Is 2 millenia of gossip and self important "tweets"something that Jesus started or did the Romans pioneer total wastes of time like "following" peoples random thoughts?
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nokaoi
seek the truth, and it will set you free
06:17 PM on 05/28/2011
smart. you deserve a fan.
09:37 AM on 05/27/2011
The Banana Republic friend sounds like he has a real problem. It's a good thing they don't sell unicorns there. Very cool piece Steph.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Steph McGrath
01:45 PM on 05/31/2011
I live with the hope he'll find another store to love soon