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Instead of getting what they want, the overly nice person will be used, abused and belittled. It's very confusing to them. Often, they think that what's called for is to be more pleasing. Of course, this only increases the persecution they're experiencing.
A lot of people are attached to the idea of being "nice." It's not so easy for these individuals to let go of their need to be nice, or to appreciate how different it is from being kind. This distinction is important, however, because these two ways of being lead to very different outcomes in one's personal and professional life.
After 20 years of dating and over 100 relationships later, I have created "The Milk and Bone Theory." Take a close look at the behaviour of cats and dogs, notice which qualities you share with both animals. You will most likely have commonalities with one more than the other. Here are five ways to tell if you are a cat or a dog in a relationships.
Kindness emerges from someone who's confident, compassionate and comfortable with themselves. A kind person is loving and giving out of the goodness of their heart. At the root of extreme niceness, however, are feelings of inadequacy and the need to get approval and validation from others.