Everyone agrees that there is more bullying these days and that it could be handled better. However, no one is asking why the incidence of bullying has increased so markedly. People used to think that bullies act the way they do because they suffer from low self-esteem. The truth turned out to be exactly the opposite.
To most parents Toddlers & Tiaras is so offensive that we can hardly watch it, let alone relate to it. While this may be obvious to many, what we often fail to see are the grains of these behaviours "normal" parents may engage in. Here are the top five lessons all parents can take from these pageant-parents in order to help their daughters build authentic and long-lasting self-esteem.
Constantly trying to avoid being disliked can take its toll on one's mental health. Indeed, most of the people I have seen in therapy with such an issue were more harmed by the worry and anxiety caused by the possibility of being disliked than by actual instances of rejection or negative evaluation.
It seems shameful that a girl or young woman should feel consumed by the alleged cornerstones of physical beauty -- perfect weight, perfect measurements, and perfect skin. If you are a mother, an aunt, a teacher or a friend to a young girl or woman, you possess the power to mentor, to help change their minds about the meaning of being beautiful, thus rescuing their potential and redirecting them toward qualities that are worthy of cultivation.
We live in a world where we've elevated starlets and hunks to god-like status because of the fact that they are thin and fit. We don't feel good enough. Skinny enough. Pretty enough. But a "thinspiration" website has gone a step further -- by calling Kate Upton (aka: Sports Illustrated cover girl) a cow. Is nothing sacred?
There is no absolute and true number when it comes to attractiveness. There are no real fives, eights or threes. Just because our society seems to be confused and mistaken in its understanding and conceptualization of physical attraction, doesn't mean that you have to make the same mistake as an individual. Having a realistic and grounded understanding of what attractiveness is and the role it plays in your life can have a big impact on your mental health.
As a mom, you may have noticed your teen struggling with self esteem. While it could be acne, weight gain or hormones, it might be your teen's smile. Are they proudly displaying their pearly whites or do they cover their mouth when they laugh? I spoke to Jennifer Vishnevsky, a contributor to TopDentists.com and she gave me some great guidelines to help you decide if tooth whitening is the right choice for your teen.
You must live life in the present -- the key to aging successfully -- but you can't do so if one foot is chained to the past and both hands are shielding your eyes from the fuzzy future. Your vision will be blocked, your hands will be full and you'll be teetering on one leg! Try to integrate the following eight habits into your day as often as possible.
My daughter does not even read magazines but the girls on television that are popular are impossibly thin while the heavier girl is either funny or obnoxious. These images trickle into our children's minds and they meanly call other kids fat or tell them they are not pretty. As a parent, how do you build your child's self esteem when it feels the world is trying to destroy it? Here are some tips that I have found really help girls to be positive and confident.
I recently wrote about rejection phobia and the impact it can have on people's lives. One of the more tragic aspects of rejection phobia is how self-sustaining the problem can be. In fact, people who are rejection phobic ultimately fabricate their own reality that perpetuates their phobia and can leave them socially isolated.
Prejudices against the overweight seem to develop early. One study found that children as young as three years of age believed fat people were "mean, stupid, ugly, and had few friends." People suffering from emotional distress in connection with weight problems are much less likely to succeed in their efforts to improve their health. For our society in general, a shift in attitude would help.
How is it that we so easily deny ourselves kindnesses and pleasures because we underrate the value of the occasion, or our own value? I've caught myself buying such tiny treats as scented soaps, and then storing them in the closet for when guests arrive. Why do I hesitate to give myself the pleasure?