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Where Did All My Thinness Go?!

Posted: 01/23/2012 7:26 am

Inspired by the very public diets of Toronto's Ford brothers -- Mayor Rob and brother Doug -- a Huffpost contributor has decided to take up their Cut the Waist challenge, and shed 30 pounds by June 18. Our contributor will weigh-in every Monday with his progress (including a photograph of his bathroom scales that morning). He would like to be less public, however, about his identity.


I was born. Thin.

I figured if I was going to start a serialized account I might as well open like Dickens. But that's where any similarity between Dickens and my weight history stops. There were no "Please, sir, may I have some more?" moments in my childhood, only "Please, family, may I eat whatever you have left?"

I was a human garbage disposal, skinny and tall like a praying mantis, and my two sisters haaaaaated me for it. A box of Kraft mac 'n' cheese? After-school snack. Dinner was always two heaping helpings of food along with two heaping glasses of whole milk. Skim milk? Who had ever heard of such a thing? A box of pudding? Round one of dessert.

Counting calories? Portion control? These were alien concepts to me during my teenage years. I grew to be six feet quickly and in seventh grade was the Shaq of my day. I was a free-range eater. I ate when i was hungry and I was always hungry, and there were absolutely no consequences to this behaviour.

It was all fun and games until around 25. Then, all of sudden...well, what the hell?

Now I'm 52, I have Type-2 diabetes, and I have been battling weight my entire adult life. I have been on every diet, been to behavioral therapy for a year, and met with a nutritionist weekly for several years. I know everything I need to know about nutrition, about making good choices, about exercise, and about strategies before holiday parties.

I can tell you the Weight Watcher points for anything just by looking at it. I can tell to the tenth of an ounce how much is four ounces of turkey. I can tell you the best strategies for late-night snacks, the best snacking foods before exercising, and the trade-offs between various salad dressings.

I can tell you why I'm eating, and what my emotional eater profile is.

The one thing I can't tell you because I'm still trying to figure it out is why I'm not freakin' losing weight?

I hope that by keeping this fat diary, I can reveal to myself and any dear readers who care to follow my trek, what I'm doing right and what I'm doing wrong.

About myself: I'm a professional geek who has been building Human Resources software since the first Bush administration. I sit on my butt pretty much all day and think think think. I go deep into flow, fingers typing with maestro flare, a Mardi Gras carnival of activity in my brain. But, to the motion detector in my office my physical body resembles the onset of rigor mortis; it commands the lights to turn off. Thankfully we don't have "smart" lights programmed to send an alert to HR to pick up the dead guy.

My nutritionist turned me on to running and the concept of regularly going to the gym. Oh that's right -- the body was designed to sometimes move. That was a couple of years ago and now I run 10K a few times a week. I also have a racquetball game every Sunday morning with my friend whose the same age as I, but a number of pounds lighter.

When I went to the gym and started working out occasionally with a trainer -- I'll call her Kickass -- with whom I developed e a very special relationship. Even during the periods when I wasn't training with her -- when I was running and was on the eight out of 10 km and my body was pleading me to stop for the day -- I would imagine Kickass with her encouraging but forceful tone saying: "You can do it. Keep going. Don't let your body convince you you can't." Now I see Kickass every Saturday for one-hour training sessions.


I weighed in this morning at 239.6 pounds which is my "point set." Last year I got down to the 225s for a week, recently i was up to the early 240s. But eventually all roads lead to 235. My goal for the Fat Diaries is to track how I get down to the low 200s. I don't know what support system Rob Ford has for his weight-loss challenge, whether the mayorship brings with it a staff of trainers and personal cooks.

I just have myself, my wife, my 16-year-old, my two dogs, my iTouch and my Nike+ sensor on my gym shoes. I hope you follow me on the Fat Diaries. Maybe together we'll learn a thing or two about how to lose weight.

My plan for this week:
I've found what works best for me with weight loss is accountability. It's one thing to make a promise to my doctor to do better or to join a support group with a weekly weigh-in. But you have to hand it to Mayor Ford for committing to a weekly weigh-in on the steps of City Hall. Mucho huevos, my friend, mucho huevos.

The biggest step I'm taking this week is to start this blog in front of potentially millions of HuffPost readers. I'll be thinking of you, and you, and you, and you -- and yes, you, I'm talkin' to you -- whenever I reach for, oh, say a stray cinnamon roll that found its way to the kitchen area at work. I'll be thinking of you when I consider skipping a 10K run because I've faked myself out to think I'm too tired.

I have no idea how many people will actually read this. The more the better, because my theory is the larger the accountability is, the better I'll stick with a strong regimen. The problem is, of course, that nobody knows who I am. And it's not like I've embedded hot Google search phrases like "Naked Scarlett Johansson" as a cheap way to get more hits...

 
 
 
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06:45 PM on 01/30/2012
Good luck with your quest. I 2nd the food log - it's amazing how much extra stuff sneaks in. And try a standing desk or balance ball to get some stray exercise.
08:05 PM on 02/06/2012
Thanks Cass. I've thought of the standing desk idea. that would be radical and fun. but sitting is good too. maybe the desk could have hydraulics to make it go up and down.
05:11 PM on 01/24/2012
Three words: Raw Food Diet. Try it for 30 days, and you're body will have no choice but to lost weight - naturally, and healthily.

Best of luck!
08:07 PM on 02/06/2012
Thanks Miss Dee,
I have seriously considered the raw food idea. I'm a very finicky eater. When I wrote about eating Mac N Cheese as a kid? I haven't evolved my food preferences that much as an adult. I don't know if i could handle it. but i've got it as a backpocket idea in case I plateau. Another friend suggested that the other value of RFD is the lifeforce you get from food that is never cooked beyond a certain temp.
12:23 PM on 01/24/2012
All the best on your weight loss journey! I suggest you try the health tools at https://www.bestliferewarded.com/tools/ The TimeTracker logs your routine and helps you to see where you can fit in time to excercise and the EatTracker helps you balance diet and activity. I use it to log my weight and get motivation each week as well... saves having to go to meetings and such.
08:08 PM on 02/06/2012
Hi Margaret,

thanks for the tip. I've tried various trackers in the past, most recently Weight Watchers. I'll keep this in mind if i start to plateau. Thanks for the support!
08:14 PM on 01/23/2012
You should try a free calorie counting app for your iTouch called My Fitness Pal. I was the same as you, my weight wouldn't fluctuate at all. But once I started using the app, I really noticed a difference. There was a lot of snacking that before using the app I could rationalize away, like, I've had a hard day, or I went to the gym today. But calorie counting removes the ability to engage in that type of guestimation. I've lost over ten pounds and hope to lose more.
08:10 PM on 02/06/2012
Hi ReadMe,

Thanks for the tip. I'll keep this in mind if i start to plateau. So far my calorie counting app is YOU. Just being there and reading my blog has helped in ways i couldn't have imagined 3 weeks ago. thanks!
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02:59 PM on 01/23/2012
You can do it!!!

And i think weight watchers is awsome! a great resource for anyone looking for help getting healthy. Even weight watchers online can help.
08:11 PM on 02/06/2012
Hi SweetBlondie,

Thanks for your enthusiasm!! I know i can do this too. On the other hand, I've been down this road before, getting all excited before a diet adventure. Anybody can do pretty much anything for a month. Let's see how this all works out in June. So far it's been a blast and i'm down 4. Thanks for your support.
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Arti Patel
02:56 PM on 01/23/2012
Good luck!
02:53 PM on 01/23/2012
Your desk job sounds like the biggest obstacle for you. But, it sounds like you know everything there is to know about weight management - you can't fail!! Good luck anyway... I'm sure you wont need it :)
08:12 PM on 02/06/2012
Thanks, Beanzy, for the support!
02:38 PM on 01/23/2012
Go Vegan, cut out junk (if you haven't already). No need to count calories or points. It just works.
07:09 PM on 01/23/2012
My husband is vegan and weighs more than the author. And we eat all organic, local food, homemade everything. I guess it's just too much good food and not enough movement. I'm vegetarian and struggle with my weight too. I plan to follow this author!
08:14 PM on 02/06/2012
Hi Jason & Lorax,

Vegan, eh? I suppose Mac 'n' Cheese is vegan, right? The good news is that my ability to enjoy eating vegetables has increased since i was a kid. The bad news: not a whole lot. Today i ate raw pea snaps with a sandwich for lunch. I enjoyed them, i would say. Did I crave them? Was i wagging my tail for them? Eh....no. I don't think i could go vegan. but i could try to get close. There's certainly more room in my diet for veggies so I'll think about that if i start to plateau. Thanks for your support!
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Glass Cannon
Let every eye negotiate for itself.
02:31 PM on 01/23/2012
Good luck. Like ChrisH75 and yourself, I can't eat a thing without something bad happening, more or less. I eat less and better than most people I call friends but I certainly do NOT have the exercise regimen you describe here. This may be the key. I will follow your blog closely.
08:17 PM on 02/06/2012
Hi Glass,

I haven't written about exercise yet but i plan to soon. It's funny: you always read about exercise when it comes to dieting but it's still unclear exactly what it does. On the other hand, do you watch The Biggest Loser? Those guys pound! And it makes a HUGE difference. I try to run 10K 2-3 times a week and i play racquetball every Sunday morning. Running has changed my life. I love it. I miss it when I don't get to it. I remember starting and i couldn't jog for 5 minutes without stopping to walk. Now I jog for an hour and 20 min without stopping. if I can do it, anybody can. thanks for your support!
02:07 PM on 01/23/2012
Good luck to you, the same thing hapenned to me when I turned 25. I used to be able to eat anything without consequence. These days, if it doesn't make me fat, it gives me the runs or heartburn. Getting old sucks.
08:19 PM on 02/06/2012
Hi Chris,

Getting old has some downfalls, but not getting old has one very seriously downfall - you're dead. So on the whole, I choose the downfalls.

sorry to hear about the runs/heartburn. there's all sorts of OTC stuff you can take for that.

thanks for your support!