Last week I mentioned how I had started a diet called Lindora. After the first week I lost 7.2 pounds. I will now open it up for questions.
Q: Shut Up!
I know!
Q: I'm sure you're going to tell us all the details of how the diet works but I don't like to actually read words. I just want to skim for the link that takes me to the site where I can buy the magic pills.
Yes, I am happy to supply a link that sends you right back to here.
Q: I notice you didn't post a picture like you always do with yourself on a scale that proves your current weight. That must mean you're lying and that NASA faked the moon landing.
The truth is, The Fat Diaries has coordinated going on the Lindora diet with a bit of minor toe surgery that will keep me off my feet through mid-August. While I'm recuperating I'm taking advantage by going on this quick weight-loss plan. Modesty prevents me from showing you my gross foot but I can assure you that higher-ups at HuffPost HQ can attest to my weight loss.
Q: How can I be sure those magic pills will work for me?
As I said in my opening remarks, I've lost the weight using the Lindora plan and virtually no gimmicks. There are no magic pills. Furthermore, I know of three other people who are on the same plan who are all achieving spectacular results, two women and a man. Therefore, to answer your question, if you are compliant with this plan you too will lose A LOT of weight -- quickly.
Q: So what's the secret? You have to use their packaged foods that are loaded with laxatives? Or -- I know! -- you have to use their packaged "food" that just so happens to include the same ingredients of the magic pill. Check aaaaaand mate!
Here are the facts: You may use store-bought food or Lindora's food. There is no magic to this. I am eating very small portions of protein for every meal and twice daily supplementing it with lettuce, a vegetable, a small amount of dressing, and a low-glycemic fruit. I am drinking 80 ounces of water and also taking potassium and fibre supplements. Oh, and every day I get a shot.
Q: Aha! The shot! There it is! That's the secret! C'mon baby, give Daddy the magic formula. Where's the link? Where can I buy a pallet of this stuff? Is it on sale on Amazon? You know what? SCREW Amazon! I'll buy it in bulk on eBay. I'll drive down to Costco RIGHT NOW if you just tell me what's in the shot. I'll buy enough for you and your whole family and a generation of families to fill a swimming pool with! I just wanna wanna wanna wanna --
So, the kind nurses at Lindora give each person a shot of Vitamin B-12 everyday along with loads of encouragement and answers to your questions. That's it. B-12. Small portions of protein with every meal and snacks. Keep your carbs around 50 grams a day. Drink your water. One day a week is protein-only, one serving every two hours. Comply with the plan. That's it.
You can even do this online.
Next week I'll talk about what it's like to be on the plan and answer the question everybody keeps asking me: Are you hungry?
Find your daily caloric maintenance level, and aim for 500cal a day less. Drink coffee (black, or w/skim. Skip on all sweeteners), and go on fasted walks (which will be much easier to get back into with an injured toe). Drop all processed foods. Drinks lots of water. The pounds wont instantly fly off, but it's a very easy, healthy way to drop weight and keep it off.
And look into carb cycling/how to time your carb intake to best prime your insulin response.
It sucks, but proper weight loss is about patience, will power and a few simple life adjustments you need to stick to.
Also, not everyone can take B12 supplements.
I changed from unhealthy food to simple food pyramid. Lotsa veggies, a bit of meat, sometimes a bit of carbohydrates and many fruits. 3 meals a day. Everything fresh, barely anything cooked or fried.
I feel full of energy for once and am practically bouncing off the walls with it.
I don't lose weight that fast but I do and it's at least healthy.
Congrats on your loss. This is not an avenue that I would have taken, but you're a big boy and you'll make your own choices. I wish you luck!
I hope that you are able to get back on track once your toe heals!
Portion control, water consumption, low carbs, and heavy intake of vegetables is best - though, you should talk to a professional. Taking in tonnes of protein without exercise is pretty silly... (though, I do understand that you have just undergone foot surgery)... Also, look into the dangers of supplements: you should be getting proper nutrition from your food. And there are MANY exercises you can do without being on your feet - to prepare yourself for the 'maintenance' phase, I'd seriously consider starting an exercise regimen now, instead of 6 weeks from now.
The thing is, if the diet ends in 6 weeks, you haven't learned the lesson. You should be using portion control, exercise, lots of water, low carb, and lots of vegetables in your daily life. The reality is that diets fail where healthy lifestyles succeed.
Yup, I am in daily contact with my doc and we are both encouraged with these results. He has seen me suffer with trying to lose weight for years. I'm doing upper body exercises but I must say I really miss the running. I can't wait to get back to it. And with a few sacks of fat less holding me down, I can begin to consider something I never thought i could do, a half-marathon.
I appreciate your concern.
This uninformed nonsense has no place in journalism.
I recognize the difference, but I would have hoped that a site like HuffPo would only share the views of bloggers who are actually well-informed on the subjects that they're writing about.
You may call yourself a blogger, but you're still being represented on a journalistic site, and you're putting ill-informed statements out to a mass audience.
Just the same way that there is a growing contingent of up-and-coming filmmakers putting content on the web. The distribution platform is new, and it gives rise to the chance for many non-credentialed people to put work out there... but that doesn't mean that it isn't a form of filmmaking/journalism, whatever... it's just that there is less discrimination, and so there's much more work that doesn't meet conventional standards by any means. That doesn't mean that the standards should be lowered, though.
Yes, this is the Weight-Loss part of the program. There is a whole maintenance section that I will write about once I'm on that. Next week I will add that I'm in daily contact with my doctor and that i'm not just doing this aloof without long-term consideration. I will also talk about what positive effect this has had on my blood sugars and the fact that I can now give up my nighttime insulin, which is a huge milestone for me. Thank you for your concern but I've done my homework and am doing this plan responsibly.
Whatever happened to portion control, eating a decent amount of vegetables and just plain common sense? Don't forget to get at least 30 minutes of exercise per day on the weekday and an extra 2 hours per day on the weekends.