THE BLOG

Why Is KFC Trying To Give Us New Ways to Kill Ourselves?

01/28/2015 11:50 EST | Updated 03/30/2015 05:59 EDT

It's shameful, really, that KFC keeps finding new ways for us to kill ourselves. Double down dog. Go on, I double dog dare you to ingest it. It is only available in the Philippines for now and nutrition facts are not available. That is only one thing that flies in the face of an overweight world. You aren't even allowed to know how bad it is.

I'm worried about the slippery slope of this horrid harbinger trend. Launching terrible food, getting lots of press for it (yes, including this post) while flying under the radar of any legislation that may or may not exist about transparency. "Hey, it is a one off" they will say. "The recipe is only being tested; we won't know the final numbers until it is firm". Even if there were a country that mandated calorie counts, there surely would be a loophole for "trial" items. Even if this were an outlawed snack (in some nutritionist heaven where there are laws around feeding kids crap), there could be no enforcement without the data. You see where I am going here?

Bad behaviour without consequences is very uncivilized, immature behaviour. Perhaps, dare I say, like the behaviour of some young people to whom these foods are marketed. I worry about this very segment of the population who will have to carry the social weight of our overgrown choices.

There is a bravado element to consuming items such as this. There's a big ha ha ha in rinks and on fields when these abominations are, er, enjoyed. But the notch on the belt that makes you need another notch on the belt can't be tenable. Why would you eat these things more than once? Nothing could possibly taste that good. No matter how hard the food producer hits the key addiction buttons.

Salt, fat, sugar and crispy texture. According to an article in Scientific American there is evidence that each of these things create a dopamine brain surge of pleasure just like sex or cocaine. Putting them together creates a high more powerful than the sum of the parts.

I don't want to live in state run nation, I don't. And I am a big believer in that even big food can make improvements. There is money to be made on the bright side of the moon; I have seen it with my own eyes. But, I wish there was a way to prevent stuff like this from ever getting to market. I'm not sure whose rights are infringed when we are only saving their heart, lungs, brain... from damage. Not to mention saving the rest of us from having to pay for the triple bypass, lap band or any other surgery that may come as a result of too much dog foolery.