How I Abandoned My Goals and Became Happier

10/05/2012 04:20 EDT | Updated 12/05/2012 05:12 EST
Flickr: ra_coons

Brace yourself. If you're an A-type personality, what I'm about to share with you might stress you out.

Here is how each of my weekdays unfolds: I sleep in. I feed my cats. I open my email and deal with it. Then, I start on whatever work is next on my to-do list.

Other than keeping a simple flat list of tasks and commitments I've made to my clients, I don't have any big plans, long-term goals, or great desires. I don't even have priorities or an order to my list of tasks. I do whatever is next on the list. Life is simpler that way.

And that -- in this age of extreme productivity -- freaks out many, many people.

Goals Are For Suckers

Of course, I want the same things as everyone -- financial stability, good health, and everlasting love. But I'm amazed at how many books, applications, podcasts, and blogs there are that all say essentially the same thing: You should first map out your entire life then work toward each goal in a series of well-planned steps.

Well, here's the harsh truth for you: Life sucks and Murphy's in charge. Have all the goals you want; they'll always get derailed. Life isn't about avoiding the potholes; life is about dealing with them the best you can.

Instead, I Have Fallbacks

I used to program computer code. In all well-written software, there exists a series of fallbacks. In simplified form, the code looks like this:




So instead of goals, I keep a small mental list of computer-code fallbacks -- things I could do if everything falls to pieces. If my speaking career dies out suddenly, what would I do for an income? What jobs would I like to do? Who do I know that could help me get them? I revisit this list in my head every couple of months, then feel completely at ease. I know that if everything goes to hell, I'll be okay. Then, I don't need to worry about marching steadily toward a set list of prioritized tasks -- I just take each day as it comes.

Story continues after the slideshow...

5 Ways to Calm Your Brain

Some days I work really well and am super-productive (like this week) and other days I can't get started to save my life. On those days, I stop working, make popcorn, curl up with my cats, and watch bad reality TV. And try again tomorrow.

It is incredibly freeing and I've never been happier.

Negative is the New Positive

People have told me that focusing on "negative" fallbacks (how to respond when something bad happens) will bring negative energy into my life. Nonsense. There is no such thing as positive or negative energy (or homeopathy, for that matter, but that's another blog post).

There is only life. Life is nothing but falling and getting up. Each fallback is a chance for me to get back up -- and each time I do that I get stronger.

So one day -- just one day this month -- drop your to-do list and follow your curiosity. Surf link to link to sites you find interesting. Play. Dream.

The work will still be there when you get back. And so will you -- even stronger than you were before.

Tod Maffin is president of engageQ digital, a digital marketing agency in Toronto and Vancouver.