What if you stepped up to a urinal and the puck inside spoke and said, "I know what you're doing down there?"
That exact thing is happening all over the province as part of Crotches Kill, a $380,000 campaign launched to combat distracted driving on Alberta roads.
"We know what you're doing down there," is the main tagline placed on billboards, radio, online and yes, even urinals, aimed at stop commuters from using their cell phones while driving.
The campaign supplements the province's distracted driving law that came into effect in September of 2011.
And the talking puck? It actually uses a seductive woman's voice to get the attention of unsuspecting men.
"Distracted by your crotch again, huh?" she says, "Well, it's fine to do it here but it can kill behind the wheel."
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The campaign is targeted at all types of distracted driving, not just texting, including e-mailing, using a GPS receiver, or writing or talking on a cell phone, according to the campaign's site.
A text message takes a driver's eyes off the road for five seconds, and for every second a driver is distracted they travel an extra 28 meters before they can react to a hazard.
A collision takes 250 milliseconds to occur so 1.5 seconds is substantial time, says Sgt. Colin Foster.
Alberta's police chiefs are also pressing the province to hand out demerits for distracted driving tickets, instead of just the current fine of $172.